| From WorldWrestlingInsanity.com Canadian Bulldog
The inspiration for this particular column came about after I watched the film GI Joe: The Rise Of Cobra recently with Complete And Utter Bulldog co-hosts The Liz and The Big Rybowski.
Rybowski noted that the actor who played Duke (Channing Tatum) had a similar look, voice and even similar mannerisms to a certain WWE superstar, namely:
This got me to thinking: How the hell can the movie theater charge $3.99 for a bottle of water? Much later, another thought came to me: what would certain movies be like if professional wrestlers played the lead roles? And no, not the "WWE Studios Straight To Video Crapathon" movies, but actual good movies? For example, what if the toughest S.O.B. in World Wrestling Entertainment history suddenly became a lot groovier and more shagadelic? Then you'd have: Stone Cold Steve Austin Powers: International Man Of Whoop-Ass
Memorable Quote: "My name is Stone Cold Steve Austin Powers. WHAT? I said, my name is Stone Cold Steve Austin Powers. WHAT? Danger is my middle name. WHAT? I said, my middle name. Do I make you horny, baby? WHAT? I said, horny..."
Forrest Punk
Memorable Quote: "My momma always said, 'life is like a box of chocolates'. Chocolates are an addiction for the weak-minded, and maybe if more of you had parents that acted as better role models, your stupid children wouldn't be addicted to chocolate!"
The Incredible Brock
Memorable Quote: "BROCK SMASH!"
(Yeah, yeah; I know. Someone wrote about this exact same storyline about two years ago.)
Game's World
Memorable Quotes: Hunter: "Hey, Shawn. Look at that total fox over there. In French she would be called 'la renarde' and she would be hunted with only her cunning to protect her." Shawn: "She's a babe." Hunter: "She's a robo-babe. In Latin she would be called 'babia majora'." Shawn: ".... Not!"
Hunter: "I think I'm gonna hurl."
Indiana Rhodes and the Templ'ahdoom, baby
Memorable Quote: "Yea, baby. We gonna get all up in the templ'ahdoom tah fine da treasure and all da gold'an'rubies'an'diamonds, baby!"
BatMcMahon
Memorable Quotes: BatMcMahon: "I'm not going to kill you. I want you to do me a favor. Okay, pal? I want you to tell all your friends about me." Criminal: "Who are you?" BatMcMahon: "Not so fast, pal. But before you get away, you're gonna have to.... KISS MY ASS!"
Criminal: "Um... what does that have to do with anything?"
© Copyright by WorldWrestlingInsanity.com WorldWrestlingInsanity.com is not
affiliated with any wrestling promotion. |
