Greetings, Crockerholics. I'm writing this article a bit early because I'm going to be camping later on in the week. Something spectacular might happen between then and now and I'll look like a fool if I don't predict it. I'm going to hedge my bets a bit.

Holy Crap!   The non-Hogan/Bischoff edition of TNA drew a 3.2 rating.   I'm just as shocked as the rest of you.

Wait. I have   a real gripe. Several weeks ago I wrote that TNA should cut back on the PPVs. I wrote that they should give away some stuff on free TV (like they did in the old days) and have half as many pay per views. Now some fool over on the Torch  is writing the same thing in a much more coherent and serious manner and taking all of the credit for it. Next week, they'll be talking about TNA's 3.2 rating. Actually I have nothing against the Torch. They aren't very funny though.

I think that Half Pint Brawlers is going to be the best show to ever be on television. Screw Lost. Half Pint Brawlers is taking over where it left off. If Super Porky doesn't make an appearance then I'm going to pissed off though. Like I warn every time,   if Super Porky is dead then don't write me to let me know. Let me go on with my fantasy that the fantastic little fucker is still alive.

Folks, I'm now Doctor Crocker.

Also, Half Pint should make an appearance.

 Super Porky is my big pappy.

Who is this R-Truth person?   That's just bad grammar.

Breaking news: Something or other happened to Orton's shoulder. Orton has grown on me over the last several years. I think the difference between him and Cena is that one of them can actually wrestle. I have to admit, however, that Orton isn't nearly as good as a face. Same with Jericho.   Batista, on the other hand, should always be a face. I know the monster heel is a big deal. It's old though. Here are some other things that are a bit old:

A series of near falls. It's starting to seem like a cheap way to garner heat in a match. Instead of near falls, how about we have a good match where people wear each other down, perhaps work a limb, throw a few one counts in there, and then someone wins clean. TNA, I'm talking to you. It could be that simple. Then again, maybe I'm too old school. Perhaps today's fan doesn't want that. Then again, we don't know until we try it.   I mean, TNA, what you're doing now is working so well.

Also old, any version by anybody of Hulking up. In fact, that's been old since 1989.

I can get behind Bret being the new general manager of RAW if that's what they want to do. Fine. He can work up another program with someone or other. Make it a slow burn leading to the next Wrestlemania. That said, can we drop the guest host now?   Has this gotten any mainstream media attention at all? Also, old--do we have to keep calling it mainstream media?   We sound like Rush Limbaugh. In today's information age there is just media. Hell, I'm part of the media and I'm as mainstream as it gets. I have all the Justin Bieber CDs and I love Glee.   I have my finger on the pulse of society. You all knew that already though.

Okay, I'm off to pack for camping. Who wants to check me for ticks?