World Wrestling Insanity: Dan Crocker on...What About Raven Four Years Ago, Teaseamania Running Wild, Triple Threat Boredom, A King Is Supposed To Be Above a Mayor, Relating To Matt Hardy's "Witty" Issues, and More

Dan Crocker on...What About Raven Four Years Ago, Teaseamania Running Wild, Triple Threat Boredom, A King Is Supposed To Be Above a Mayor, Relating To Matt Hardy's "Witty" Issues, and More

By Dan Crocker
Jul 9, 2009 - 4:01 PM

I can remember back during the Wednesday night ppvs on TNA a time when everyone was just chomping at the bit for Raven to be given the belt. I think I even wrote something (either for here or one of the many TNA fan sites that popped up and didn't last long) that a Raven championship win could be a turning point for TNA. At the time, it was a perfect storm. TNA had built up so much tension around it, the fan base wanted it so badly, that it would have been a great moment. But, there was something back then to do with permanent contracts, etc, and TNA was reluctant to give anyone but Jarrett the belt. Maybe it was for the best, because let's face it. Raven is like that really good looking girl you wanted to go out with in high school but never had the guts to ask. Then you see her ten years later and she's about 300 pounds overweight.

I have a funny hat, but at least I didn't get fat, baby.

Speaking of TNA, Hogan has said that TNA is just missing that one big start to put them on par with WWE. To this I say...no.

Does anyone else watch UWF on ESPN classic? I try to catch it as often as I can. I love the announcers. They're so earnest that they tried to sell Super Ninja. You really would have though he was going places. That Larry Zbyzsko, however, no future for that guy.

I'm pretty tired of triple threat matches—especially ones involving HHH and Cena. You could say I've Cena it one too many times. Come on, where's my rim shot? That was good. Seriously though. Here's a suggestion for both WWE and TNA. It's a pretty novel idea. Cutting edge even. How about PPV main event matches that go over twenty minutes, inside a wrestling ring with only two people and no other gimmicks that have a clear winner and a clear loser? It's revolutionary. Also, bring back Super Ninja—who from what I can't tell wasn't really a ninja.

I can't understand why Jerry Lawler is considering running for mayor of Memphis. Isn't this a step down for him? I always though King was better than mayor. That would be like Bruce Springsteen running for Senior VP of a company when he's already the boss. That said, I love Memphis. It's one of, if not, my favorite cities in the world. So go for it Jerry. Why the hell not. We're only a few Michael Jackson tributes away from the apocalypse as it is.

Matt Hardy wrote this: “Anybody who writes about me, whether good or bad, but especially bad.. I couldn't care less. I just say thanks for keeping me in the news." Guys and gals, this quote is directed toward internet writers, haters, and bogus pro wrestling journalism--no one loves & respects their TRUE casual fans more than I do! Anyone who has met me over the course of the last 15 years knows that. So basically, when a "keyboarder" looks to be "witty" by making a joke surrounding myself of Jeff, I'm indifferent towards it”

I just have one comment about this. Why did he put witty in quotation marks? I am witty, damn it. There's no reason to get snarky about it.

Apparently Matt is mad about internet writers who have made fun of his weight when it was, in fact, caused by a medical condition out of his control. I don't think I've ever made fun of Matt's weight, and I make fun of just about everyone's weight—see my opening paragraph for example. I only do it because fat people don't have feelings.

I'm fat as well. Do I have feelings? Well, is hungry a feeling?