So, I watched a little bit of the Larry King Wrestlemania special, and I learned a few things. First, Larry King looks like a cave troll if you’re high. It’s especially scary when he looks right into the camera and says, “Next up, I’ll introduce you to the biggest man you’ve ever seen.”   Seriously, I sat through the commercial convinced there would be a knock on my door, I’d open it up, it would be Larry King, and he’d have a giant standing behind him.   It’s also really funny, if you’re high, when Larry Kings says “So how big are you, Big?”   I don’t know why it’s funny, it just is. Maybe there’s just one too many bigs in that sentence, or maybe it’s because one of them has to be capitalized. Or possibly it’s because half of the time Show was in character and half the time he wasn’t.

            HHH was also on the show. Larry King ask Hunter if WWE treated him pretty well?   He’s the owner’s son-in-law Larry, of course they’re treating him well. Do your homework. Hunter’s answer was classic though.   He said, “Larry, you’re a king. I’m the King of Kings, ergo, I am your king.”   Then, to top it all off, Vince uttered the greatest wrestling catch phrase of all time, “Last time he broke his nose, this time he’ll break his jaw.”   Well, it wasn’t exactly that, but it was close.

            Seriously, am I just being a curmudgeon here?   Have I gotten to the point that I can’t be happy about anything that isn’t the “good old days” (and by gold old days I mean when I still had a mullet). But I really don’t like it when my wrestlers break kayfabe on Larry King. I can handle it if it’s just one wrestler; it doesn’t break my suspension of disbelief as much. But when it’s a face and a heel who are supposed to hate each other, I feel like nothing in my world makes sense anymore.   I mean, if two hated archrivals can sit down next to each other on Larry King without coming to blows, then why the hell are there heel locker rooms and face locker rooms?   Hell, turn on Larry King and they’ll all get along, save yourself some money on a locker room.  Maybe it’s just because it’s Larry King, king of cave trolls, who I once watched interview Prince for a full hour. By the time the interview was over, I was convinced Larry King had never heard of Prince in his life.  He spent twenty minutes asking the man who wrote Purple Rain if he missed doing that TV show where he was a poor kid living with a fat guy.

            In other news, we’ve seen the last RAW until after Wrestlemania, and it was WWE’s last chance to sell the PPV. I’ll be interested to see what the buy rates are for this one. I’d also like to hear, from our faithful readers who decide to buy Wrestlemania, which match sold it to them.   Personally, I’m not going to get it this year. I would like to see Flair’s last match, especially since I think they finally got Flair right this week. His interaction with HBK was right on, his manic figure four on Orton, all of it was great. WWE should have had him doing this stuff for weeks now.  I also wonder what’s going to happen between Big Show and Mayweather. I’m not sure it will be good, but it will be a spectacle, and that’s not a bad thing for a wrestling show. However, I really can’t afford to hand over 55 bucks when I’m not real interested in the main event.   Knowing my luck though, it’ll end up being the best PPV in years.