We Want Insanity
(23 Mins) JG's Free Audio Insanity: The 2016 WWE Draft Rerun
JG's 7/25/05 Raw Insanity: Carlito Pins The WWE Champion...Seriously
We Want Gaming: Real Time Video Game News
The ROHbot Report: Philly Results, Field of Honor Dream Match, and More
WWE RAW Real Time Streaming Coverage
Facebook
Twitter
Weirdest Wrestling Video Game Moments
TGIF: Finally Ibushi, No Confetti For Charlotte, and More
The Queen's Bow: An Emerald Appraisal
(45 Mins) Honor Nation: Dashing, Drafting, Wellness Violating


Crocker! WWE Has a Dream, New Newt Has a Problem, Jericho Has a Jacket, and Linda Has Celebreality Counseling

By Dan Crocker Jan 19, 2012 - 3:53 PM print


This week WWE had a dream. They even started out with Martin Luther King's famous speech.

 

 

Unfortunately, WWE's dream is that it was 1991 again. Come to think of it, in that way me and WWE aren't that different. To help fulfill their dream, it looks like they're putting Foley in the ring for the Royal Rumble. I think he has a chance because not even Sheamus could throw his fat ass over the top rope. The laws of gravity give me a decent chance in the Rumble as well. I deserve my shot.

 

Seriously, I'm a Foley fan. I just don't know how good of an idea this is, but if he is going to wrestle again this is where he needs to do it. He didn't hurt the six man tag match on RAW and was actually kind of fun. With all of the chaos and what not, he won't have to carry the match. He can sit back and be carried. He can even take a bit of a beating, go far into the Rumble, and come out looking pretty good. It's a mini-storyline that could work. So why not. Just make this it.

 

 

On TNA this week, you can look forward to a steel cage match between the knockouts. When reached for comment, one anonymous fan said, "as long as the cage don't get in the way of some boob action, what do I care."   Speaking of boob action, Flair will also be on tonight's Impact. No word yet on whether or not he's going to be in the steel cage match.   One man who most certainly won't be there (and not because TNA didn't do their best to book him) is former WWE champion Newt Gingrich (or as he was once booked, New Newt Gingrich or in Georgia just "The Grinch" whose finisher was "The Eye of Newt).

 

If you haven't heard you are probably dead, but old Newt is in a bit of trouble over once proposing to his ex-wife (one of them) that they have an open relationship. I don't find this surprising, and it has nothing to do with political affiliation. I never find anything rich people do surprising. If I was rich, I'd do all sorts of crazy stuff. What I do find surprising is that   Newt found two women who would have sex with him. That's one more than me, and I used to be pretty good looking.

 

 

Look at the way this cougar eyes Newt's neck waddle.   In some cultures, the waddle is a sign of virility.

 

 

Look folks, call it what you will, but I want Jericho's new jacket. I can finally live my dream of being featured on People of Walmart. It's awesome, and I'd fit right in around here. Of course I'd have to make a few adjustments. For one, it would have to be camouflage.   I'd also have to tear the sleeves off. Then I'd have to put a pack of Decades  in my front pocket.

 

Finally, you may have heard that VH1 has decided to give up helping celebrity drunks and druggies and instead have decided to turn their humanitarian efforts toward celebrities in dysfunctional relationships. What does this have to do with wrestling? Why wrestling's own Linda Hogan, along with her 23 year old boyfriend, will be featured. I bet Hulk loves the fact that his money is paying for his ex to be banged by a 23 year old. And while Linda is 53, I have it on good authority that New Newt Gingrich would still tag it.

 

 

So Linda is looking a little doughy around the middle. That doesn't deter New Newt, who can be seen here on the left being a total douchebag by pulling his shorts down to his scrotum so the photographer can get a good shot of his "killer abs."

 

That's it folks. This picture has put me in a bad mood.

 




blog comments powered by Disqus

JG col

JG's 10/19/15 Raw Insanity: Hell of a Sell
JG's 10/5/15 Raw Insanity: Flashing The Brock Signal
JG's Insanity: The 12th Annual WWE Memorial Day Barbecue
JG's Insanity: The 11th Annual WWE Memorial Day Barbecue
JG's Ten Facebook Posts To Annoy Your Friends
JG's Ten Beloved TV Characters Who Were Obvious Psychopaths
JG's 10 More Fun Ways To Infuriate People Online
JG's Ten Insider Wrestling Terms You Shouldn't Use When Talking About Something Besides Wrestling
JG's Insanity: The 10th Annual WWE Memorial Day Barbecue
JG's Ten Demented Ways We Misused Our Toys
JG's 15 Fun Ways To Infuriate People Online
JG's Ten Sesame Street Muppets That Are Missing And Presumed Dead
JG's Scene From WWE Raw (After Vince McMahon Goes Senile)
JG's Ten Signs You Were A Wrestling Fan Of The 1980s
JG's Insanity: Stone Cold's Greatest Moments (Without Stone Cold)
JG's Ten Wrestling Moves That Really Hurt When You Try Them At Home
JG's Insanity: Everybody Is Tito Santana
JG's Ten Reasons Why WWF LJN Figures Were The Greatest Toys Ever
JG's Ten Judges Who Would Make American Idol Worth Watching
JG's 2012 in Pictures (As Hulk Hogan Will Remember It)
JG's Quintuple Bypass Surgery Insanity
JG's Five Episodes of Diff'rent Strokes That Scarred Me For Life
JG's Ten Facebook Posts That Are Slowly Driving Me Crazy
JG's Ten Truly Terrible Reality Competition Shows
JG's Ten 1980s TV Characters Who Taught Me To Hate
JG's Ten Wrestling Characters Who Went Through Massive Personality Changes
JG's Ten Old School Wrestlers Who Would Terrorize Today's PG WWE
JG's Ten Crazier Fanbases Than Wrestling's
JG's Ten Copycat Wrestling Characters (and The Gimmicks They Copied)
JG's Raw 1000 Insanity: The Rocky Road To Royal Rumble

The ROHbot Report: Philly Results, Field of Honor Dream Match, and More
TGIF: Finally Ibushi, No Confetti For Charlotte, and More
Weirdest Wrestling Video Game Moments
TGIF: Here Comes Balor, Must Watch Matt Hardy, and More
Greatest Summer Video Game Releases
The Question: What's The Greatest '80s Movie?
The ROHbot Report: Aftershock Baltimore, Return to England, and More
TGIF: The Viper Heads To Suplex City, Down Goes Jones, and More
Greatest Video Game Patriotic Moments
The ROHbot Report: Concord Tapings, CMLL Star Debuts, and More
TGIF: New Day vs Bullet Club, Russo To The Rescue, and More
Worth Your Money? ROH "Supercard of Honor X: Night 2"
The Question: What's Your Favorite Riddle?
The ROHbot Report: Best in the World Review, Strong Leaves, and More
TGIF: It's Damn True (Or Not), ROH Gets Less Strong, and More
The Question: What Discontinued Snack Do You Miss Most?
The ROHbot Report: "Best in the World" Preview Special
The ROHbot Report: Tag Wars, Return to Hammerstein, and More
TGIF: Overthrowing The King, TNA Saved By A Pumpkin, and More
Worth Your Money? ROH "Supercard of Honor X: Night 1"
The Question: What Video Game Have You Mastered?
Someone Sell Me a Fighting Game!
The ROHbot Report: Adam Cole Pulled, Women of Honor Event, and More
TGIF: Hideo Any Day-o, The Passing of Kimbo Slice, and More
The Bad Girls Club Season 15 - Episode 13: Reunion (Part 3)
The Question: What Music Video Freaks You Out?
Game Day - Dead Rising 4 Leaked, Rick and Morty in Fallout 4, and More
The ROHbot Report: Collinsville Results, Fight Without Honor, and More
TGIF: Ellen Gets In Cena's Pants, Big Critic Vader, and More
The Bad Girls Club Season 15 - Episode 12: Reunion (Part 2)

-

Crocker! Lead
Jan 31, 2016
Crocker! It Ain't No Lie, Baby
Sep 24, 2015
Crocker! Eat
Apr 9, 2015
Crocker! City of Bones
Feb 26, 2015
Crocker! I Ain't Eating This Crap
Feb 5, 2015
Crocker! Welcome To Fantasy Island!
Jan 29, 2015
Crocker! Leave Me The Unwanted
Jan 15, 2015
Crocker! Dear God
Dec 18, 2014
Crocker! Video Poem: C Is For Cookie
Nov 20, 2014
Crocker! My Stupid Cucumber Story
Nov 13, 2014
Crocker! Elmo Goes Emo
Oct 23, 2014
Crocker! Stigmata
Oct 9, 2014
Crocker! The Greatest Game Ever Told
Sep 25, 2014
Crocker! Where We Come From
Sep 11, 2014
Crocker! What's Wrong with Missouri?
Aug 21, 2014
Crocker! My Pal, The Vagina
Jul 31, 2014
Crocker! I Used To Be Someone's Favorite Eclipse
Jul 18, 2014
Crocker! How Me and Lord Byron Got our Grooves Back
Jul 3, 2014
Crocker! The Night I Met Larry Brown
Jun 19, 2014
Crocker! Hole
Jun 5, 2014

Even More From This Category >>

ClubWWI.com Contact Us Forums
All content contained here Copyright - We Want Insanity Dot Com