Dan Crocker
Crocker! Roode Tizziness, Razor On The Edge, and Brother Bro Bro Brotherman
By Dan Crocker
Oct 20, 2011 - 7:02 PM

When I wrote my little thing about MCW last week, I forgot to add a transcript of an actual phone conversation between Hulk Hogan and Johnny G. So rather than just forgetting about it and moving on to something else like a normal columnist, I'll add it here.   It is as follows.   Keep in mind that this is an actual phone conversation. Nothing has be omitted or added.



Johnny G (as Hogan picks up the phone):   Hey, brother.   I got some bad news. Some really bad news, bro.


Hogan: Don't tell me, brother. I'm not even in the mood for this today, bro.


Johnny G: You're going to have to hear this, brother.


Hogan: Bro, what is is, brother?


Johnny G:   Bro, I fired Blixx for, bro, talking back to me, brother bro.


Hogan: Bro brother, that's brothersome.   We're going to go broke, bro if you don't brogin to book, bro, matches better, brother.


Johnny G: Brother bro bro.


Hogan: Bro.   I mean, bro!


Johnny G:   I'm sorry bro bro.


Hogan: Brother bro, bro, bro, brother, bro bro.



            In other news, TNA had a PPV and it was a'right. The much anticipated Sting and Hogan match happened. There was much raking of fingernails across the back. There was plenty of circling. They eyed each other up like a couple of real champs. A few people, and I'm not naming names here, choped and punched.   Then Sting won.


            Roode did not win. He was beaten fairly cleanly by Kurt Angle. Sure, Angle held the rope for a bit of leverage, but the outrage for that sort of thing ended around 1986. These days, that's like not even cheating. Let's face it, if you can't kick out because someone is holding the second rope, which bends a fair amout--I mean getting any real leverage from that sort of breaks the laws of physics--then you deserved to lose anyway.  


            There were some other matches too. I think Diamond Dallas Page beat Chris Jericho for a chance to join the NWO.   I can't mention Page without posting this:



Remember her?


            This Roode thing has gotten some folks in a tizzy.   Most people think he should have been given the belt on Sunday.   You know what I say to this?   Give it some time. I'm sure TNA has a plan. When have they ever let us down before on this sort of thing?


            Watch the ESPN documentary on Scott Hall. It's sad and frightening, and one can only hope he gets on the right track eventually. I guess there are just as many of these stories for plumbers as there are for professional wrestlers. I know there's just as many for writers. Professional wrestlers are in the spotlight, of course, but it's the same for anyone. Addiction is a bitch.


            Finally, speaking of writers and addiction, buy my new book.   All the info is HERE (click here, fool!).



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