Dan Crocker Crocker! Filling Three Hours, CM Punk Punches Us In The Nose, Clean and Hardy, and More
By Dan Crocker
Nov 17, 2011 - 2:00 PM
Everything old is new again. This includes Mick Foley and the Rock. Obviously, the Rock has aged a bit better. I love Foley. I think he's intelligent, a decent enough writer, and good on the mic. His wrestling days are over, however. In all honesty, he was always entertaining in the ring but never technically a top notch wrestler. He could just put his body through a bit more pain than the next guy. Still, it was pretty nice to see Foley and Rock back together again. At least I thought it was going to be, but in the end the segment just fell flat. The "This is your life" thing went on too long and was agonizing.
All of this just to set up the Rockbottom on Mick.
I understand that they had three hours to fill and were probably scrambling a bit. You know how to fix that problem?
Don't have a three hour long show.
We did get to see Bull Buchanan. Take that for what you will.
One of the big problems with this segment was that those involved kept talking about how bad it was as it was going on. The only other place you but be so adament about how bad something is and yet continue is in bed with a wife you've been married to for forty years.
"Jesus, honey, what are you doing . .. what . . . This is awful."
"Want me to stop?"
It happened in the opening segment as well.
All that bullshit between Cole and Ross. The armwrestling, the dancing, it all sucked. So, Punk comes out and tells us all how much it sucked. You know, that doesn't actually make it better. It's like if I punched someone in the nose and then said, "You know what. That wasn't very cool of me."
Their freakin' nose still hurts. WWE has got to be pretty damned confident that their key audience will sit through any shit.
And we will.
We're like Pavlov's dogs.
I have a question? Is WWE now working for Twitter? I swear, they mentioned it at least 9,000 times.
Now on to the good news.
I'll let a picture do the talking:
That's right, my fiance is back in TNA.
TNA also had a recent PPV, of course. I didn't watch it. It doesn't sound like I missed much. By all accounts, it made people as sad as Kermit the Frog.
Apparently Jeff Hardy beat Jeff Jarrett three times in short order during the PPV. That's almost as many times as he shot heroin during the PPV.
We all hope Hardy is clean and healthy.
Of course, after the clean chair shot Jarrett gave him, who knows. I thought we were past chair shots in wrestling. Not that I'm complaining. In my day we gave chair shots to students, during church, weddings. It didn't matter. We were tougher back then--unless you gave us a pile driver anywhere but in the ring. Also, some of us were a little susceptible to the claw. You wouldn't think it, but that shit hurts.