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The Heat Report: Snitsky Does a Crazy Squash, Holly Takes On Murdoch, and The Magical Mask of Charlie Haas Does Him No Good

By Fritz Stephey Jan 9, 2008 - 3:11 PM print

Ladies and gentlemen, let's get ready for some HEAT!

We're opening with Super Crazy. He will be taking on…Snitsky. Funny thing about Snitsky, why is it when you take away the hair that he looks 50? With it, he was - what? - 30-something at worst?

Crazy dodged a blow from Snitsky, but he gets shoved into the corner post. Crazy goes to work on Snit's legs but Snitsky slams him down. He drops an elbow to his back and slaps on a headlock. Snitsky looks to be preparing for the pump handle slam while Crazy was trying to fight out, but the big bald man turns it into a suplex of sorts. That's when Super Crazy ALMOST gets tossed out of the ring, kind of got tangled up on the top rope. Once out, he eats another suplex from Snitsky, who then goes to drop the leg but Crazy moves. Crazy is starting to use speed and it's helping. He grabs a two-count. Crazy unfortunately also grabs a boot to the face and Snitsky hits the pump handle slam. 1-2-3, and Snitsky wins.

Did you think with Super Crazy that it may be more than just a squash? Me neither.

The world's best Royal Rumble commercial makes a HEAT appearance.

DH Smith makes his way to the ring. He's taking on David Owen. This David guy just looks like a smaller Tomko. DH starts by putting an arm-lock on and twisting, but he gets it reversed. Holy crap - here's somethign somewhat interesting. As Tomko Jr. had this arm lock on DH, Smithy walked to the ropes, managed to get David's arm wrapped around the middle rope, and then gave it a swift kick. He stays focused on the arm. He now has locked on an ARMBAR, but Tomko's long-lost brother gets his foot on the rope and lands a big fist to the face. He then gives the same treatment to DH, working on the arm. DH Smith fights out with some big hits to the face, but Owen slams Smithy into the corner post. Two big uppercuts - strike that - three big uppercuts from D.H., and a clothesline. A big boot from Owen, followed by a big suplex from Bulldog's son (British Bulldog's…not Canadian Bulldog), and he scores the 3-count.

Wow…good match from two people I haven't seen much from. I thought I was just gonna see The Tomko Imposter do the job, but…it was more than that.

Making his way to the ring next is none other than Charlie Haas. He's taking on Drew McIntyre. If you happened to listen to ZAH's audio, this was the episode of HEAT he was referring to. Charles Haas started off by saying he's the W in WWE. A Wrestler

Haas goes right for Drew's arm, but gets flipped around by Mister McIntyre. Haas leads Drew to the corner, gets a cheap shot in, whips McIntyre to the opposite corner, and charges for him.  Drew leaps up, hits two arm drags, locks on a side headlock, and scores a two-count. He follows up with a nice dropkick that sends Haas to the outside…and  under the ring. He pops out and he's wearing a Lucha-esque mask. He flips into the ring, gets some hits on the Scot, and rubs his face into the mat. Haas chokes up McIntyre on the ropes, sends him head-first into the corner. Drew comes back with two kicks, but Haas takes him down. Charlie winds up eating an ellbow to the face as he charges in. But Haas rebounds with a belly to belly suplex and two-count. This is followed up by a side-suplex from Charlie. He then flips around some more and climbs the ropes. He's up top…and he just jumps off and lands on his feet…and then hits a standing splash. The mask is off, and Drew gets a clothesline, a big hit, big back body drop, and a swinging neck breaker but only a two-count.   A back-suplex later and Drew holds the move to grab a 3-count.

Decent…this Charlie Haas mask thing is kinda weird though…maybe if I give it some time? I dunno.

It's time for the Main Event, and that just happens to be Trevor Murdoch, and he'll be taking on Hardcore Holly.

The two southern gentlemen get ready to square off.  The crowd is chanting Hardcore Holly's name as they lock up in the middle. Trevor gets to the ropes and it's broken off. Murd puts a headlock on, Bobby tries to fight it off, but gets sent off the ropes. However, he gets in a kick to Trev. Some big hits and an elbow drop later and Bob gets a two-count. A knee to the stomach and slap to the back from Murdoch. Big elbow to the face from Trevor, but he won't get any count, as Holly winds up landing directly under the ropes.  No matter.  Murdoch lands another elbow to Holly's face and stretches him out.  He focuses on Bob's midsection and tries to use the ropes for leverage, getting in what he can while the ref doesn't see him. Hardcore counters, but gets sent into the corner post. Some clotheslines and a big back body drop from Holly, who picks up a two-count. Murdoch jumps up after being thrown into the corner, which just allows Holly to grab on and hit the Alabama Slama. 1-2-3, and Holly is your winner.

Not bad…especially if you like the style of big hitting.

And that…is HEAT. It got the squash out of the way at the start and then put up 3 decent matches.

As always, I appreciate comments and criticisms. You can reach me at BrothaFritz@gmail.com or on the forums (Other Insanity > HEAT Thread). Cya next Heat.

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