JG's Columns
JG's Insanity Notebook: Koko Pops, Two-Inch Hogan vs. Andre, TNA: Celebreality Edition, The Boy Toy and The Dead Man, Hunter Hearst Home-Invader, and More
By James Guttman
Mar 12, 2009 - 9:54 AM

- Koko B. Ware is in the Hall of Fame this year.   While I don't particularly care too much either way, I think it's nice to see him honored.   Then again, I can’t help but think that if WWF Primetime Wrestling shot to a match between Koko and Bob Orton in the late '80s, I would have switched channels to Perfect Strangers or go play with some Shrinky Dinks or something.   I mean, the bird was great and everything but Demolition, Davey Boy Smith, Jacques Rougeau, and many others could come before him.   That's without even mentioning you know who-ooooooooooo yeah.   Dig it!

- Vicki Guerrero has the most widely varied taste in men of anyone I've ever seen.   I wouldn't be surprised if she started boffin' Hornswoggle next.

- WWE's Legends of WrestleMania video game looks really good to me.   Sure, it's got different controls, but I'm from the '80s, folks.   I used to play the handheld two inch LCD version of Hogan vs. Andre.   It had one button that went only up or down.   You had to be on the same line with Andre to do some sort of tackle move.   Also, the only noise it made was a high pitched beep.  

- On a side note, now I feel really old.   I should have ended the last blurb with the sentence, "…and it was made out of rocks and dirt and we LOVED IT!"

- Stan Hansen should be in the WWE Hall of Fame.   He should be in every Hall of Fame.  He's friggin' Stan Hansen.

- TNA is now brining in Danny Bonnucci and the girl who was on Survivor about 19 seasons ago.   One day, TNA is going to sell off everything they have and release every wrestler.   Then they're going to do an edition of Impact in an entire empty arena with Jennifer Lopez just sitting still on a chair for the full hour.  

- It would probably draw a 1.2 and they'll tout the success of their wrestling show to all who'll listen.

- I hope Triple H's home invasion and terrorizing of Randy Orton's happy family doesn't give Chyna any ideas.

- Kizarny got released.   Sizuprised?

- I have a new uncut shoot interview in the works with many more on the way, guys.   So stay tuned.   In fact, I just posted a 32 minute audio on ClubWWI.com called "Good Morning with James Guttman."   I enjoy my coffee and speak about everything from the Christian-was-supposedta angle to why nice wrestlers might have bad reps.   To show how it truly was first thing in the morning, I got the date wrong until the second half of the show.  

- Shawn Michaels and the Undertaker will be awesome.   The casket match that lead to Shawn's hiatus between the two was the culmination of a great feud back in the '90s.   When the DX coffin that was supposed to have Hunter in it for a silly skit ended up really being Taker, Michaels sold it great.   With the Montreal Screwjob in November and Austin 3:16 at Mania that year, most forget about the feud between the two.   It was a great one though and I'm glad to see them getting to do it again at Mania.

- That said, Shawn needs to cheer up.   Ever since he stopped crotch-chopping, he's so down trodden.   Buck up, Boy Toy.  

That does it for now.   Crocker should be by soon with his stories of eating too much barbecue and love of Lita.   Fritz Stephey is back tonight with a full review of TNA Impact as only he can.   Then tomorrow, it's Matt Dawgs in the morning with his week-in-review and Aaron Wood in the evening with some Unreal Time Smackdown coverage.   See you then.   Be well!