(This column originally appeared on July 25, 2007.  Not much has changed, has it?)

"Hogan Knows Best" Returns for Yet Another Season

Jim and Margaret Anderson and their winsome kids, Betty, Bud and Kitten, returned to our TV's this week. Well, not quite. Instead of the more modest nostalgia TV favorites from "Father Knows Best," we got Hulk and Linda and their winsome kids, Brooke and Nick, with a new season of "Hogan Knows Best."

We also got a whole lot more. In fact, we got what is commonly known as "too much information." I'd be willing to bet there is NO ONE who longed to see Hulk Hogan sitting on a toilet, pants around his ankles, doing his business. Trust me, it's not a good look for the Hulkster.

Since the theme of the episode was marriage counseling for the bickering Hogans, there was no need for the potty shot other than for shock value. Either that, or Hulk has come out with a new line of bathroom fixtures--the HulkaPotty.

By the end of the thirty-minute episode, the Hogans had kissed, "cuddled" *wink, wink* and made up. What wacky topic will they find to entertain us with next week?

Never mind--I don't think I want to know.

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Remember The Oddities?

When I learned that Hornswoggle had become the Cruiserweight Champion at "The Great American Bash," my first thought was Are they serious? But then I thought about it a little more. Maybe it was a brilliant idea in disguise, especially since pro wrestling has often been compared to a circus.

Consider this: Smackdown has the nearly 8-foot tall Great Khali wearing a title belt (or title bracelet, when you're as big as he is). Now, with a little person wearing the Cruiserweight Belt, they have the perfect championship poster in the making--Khali holding Hornswoggle in the palm of his hand. The only thing missing is a bearded lady.  The Highlanders are bearded and wear skirts. Would that count?

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John Who?

WWE is in the process of giving makeovers to some of its superstars. For instance, John Morrison wasn't a household name a few days ago, but since Johnny Nitro has started using his "given name," it automatically gives him a more serious persona. And now that he's in the hunt for a title, it doesn't hurt to be taken seriously.

Snitsky got a makeover, too. His goatee with the festive rubber band has been replaced by the clean-shaven look. All the better to see his greasy skin and poor complexion. How about morphing Snitsky into a fur-covered wrestling Sasquatch next time?

Just a thought.

Sometimes makeovers are not such a good thing.  How often had you wished that Viscera would finally get out of those ridiculous silk jammies?  Well, Viscera has resurfaced on ECW as Big Daddy V, someone whose ringwear consists of black pants and suspenders (sort of like a jumbo singlet) and mural-sized tats.  Once you get a look at a shirtless Big Daddy V, you'll be begging him to put those jammies back on.  Get that man a BRA!

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Thanks for reading and see ya next week.