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Mallory Looks at Stuff on TV This Week: Brooke, Torrie and The Miz

By Mallory Mahling Jul 1, 2009 - 8:58 AM

Wrestling turns up in the darndest places. I was watching an episode of TLC's "What Not to Wear" recently when The Miz's tee shirt showed up on the style-challenged person who was about to be transformed by show hosts Stacey and Clinton with a new $5,000 wardrobe and a make-over. Actually, The Miz's tee shirt was one of her better outfits, since this person admitted she actually wore pajamas to the office.  Yikes! 

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Congratulations to Torrie Wilson for surviving the Costa Rican jungle, the critters, the bugs, and Janice Dickinson on "I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here."  Torrie very nearly became Queen of the Jungle, but lost in the finale to Lou Diamond Phillips. 

"I'm a Celebrity is one of those shows that sounds like a recipe for a train wreck, but it turned out to have a lot of qualities guaranteed to warm the hearts of viewers.  These folks may be celebrities, but they came across as wonderful people.  (Except for Janice and Speidi, who seemed to have no redeeming qualities whatsoever.)

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If you ask me, the viewers are being played on "Brooke Knows Best."

Last week Brooke and her roommate were invited on a cruise by some guy with a boat and "sleazebag" written across his forehead. She was also given a fistful of cash ($20,000, we were told). To a normal person, that would have set off a red flag, but not Brooke and her pal. They hopped on the boat and didn't seem to realize until they were in the Bahamas that something was expected in return for the 20 grand. *slapping forehead*

It was a real adventure for the gals, who had to flee the boat when it docked in the Bahamas and then charter another one to get home.  When the chartered boat neared Miami Beach, the scantily-clad gals leapt off that boat and swam to shore.  (By the way, according to Brooke when she appeared on the Chelsea Lately Show Monday night, she has recently had her bubbies done.)  Throw in a couple of wardrobe failures (with the naughty bits obscured, of course), and what do you have?  Probably not a real reality show.   

Were viewers really supposed to believe that Brooke was that naive?   And where was her HulkaDaddy, who routinely becomes apoplectic when Brooke so much as goes out on a date, much less on a cruise with a playboy with monkey business on his mind?

I would surmise that Daddy Dearest was probably secure in the knowledge that the cameraman and the film crew would take care of his little girl.

Moving right along . . .

This week on "Sister Knows Best," Nick reappeared and shared his jailhouse tales, then tried to reunite Brooke with her brokenhearted mother. I was beginning to feel sorry for Linda the Cougar when it occurred to me that Brooke and Linda's estrangement was probably as real as that $20,000 cruise to the Bahamas. In a few weeks, they will hug and makeup, and Charlie the Boy Toy will take his place at curbside, having been kicked there in order to bring about a happy family reunion.

I've said it before and I'm sure I'll say it again -- Oh, brutha!

 

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Thanks for reading and see ya next week! 

 


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