THE GREEN TEABAGGER

Might as well start off with....Chavo Guerrero's release.

Aaron Wood: Some Chavo tweeting since the news has come out, verbatim.

Yes, it's true. My release is the big news I was talking about. But let's get something straight. I asked for my release. I was just tired..

Of not being used correctly. Just cuz u can make other ppl look good, doesn't mean they should just have u lose to them. The same thing...

Happened to Eddie. After being champ, they still had him working mid card status. Being a Guerrero, we've been taught since diapers to get..

The most out of ppl & matches. It's our gift, but also our curse. WWE has always used us to make other ppl look good. It all comes down to

Being happy. I was not happy in WWE anymore. I had a smile on my face last night though when I got my release though! :) now it's time for

For me to start being a Guerrero again, and start kicking ass again, be able to tell stories in the ring like u know we can. :) win or lose

I will never go back to the place WWE put me in. I will never go back to being under utilized and watching ppl who suck get bigger "pushes"

Than me! Thank u to all of u who stuck by me & kept reminding me, I was better than that! :) stay tuned.. Big things coming!! Now I will

Really be able to entertain u! :) like me or hate me, 1 thing I have always tried to do is entertain u and give u fans your $ worth. Even if

My hands were tied most of the time. I love u all and can't wait for the future!! So happy. :)

----------The Chosen 1: 17 Hours before that (and right now) he said: "Guerrero's have always been rebels, so It's time for me to start being a Guerrero..Big news coming a bit later..stay tuned!" So he knew atleast as of around 6pm yesterday

shooting: Wait isn't he a still an active pro on NXT? If so then I wonder what they will do. Yeah is the last WCW guy but the amount of WWF guy from 2001 still in the WWE is only 9. Also the guys they picked up in 2001 weren't long term talents (DDP and Booker T were the ones with a name value to them) BTW Rey was in WCW. Personally I think its got something to do with that Sin Cara match at that PPV

----------Aaron Wood: Yes, while Rey was in WCW, he wasn't part of the group who came in after the buyout. He was brought in later, and so doesn't count. But yes, going from his tweets, I'd bet that he's not in fact a big Sin Cara fan. He sure as shit got the heat for having the bad matches with him.

RowdyRodimus: Did anyone ever tell Chavo he isn't Eddie? Chavo seemed to think that he deserved a huge push because Eddie died. He hasn't changed his character at all since Kerwin White ended. He is too plain, it's as simple as that. Hell, WWE knew it and made Rey the successor to Eddie instead of Chavo because they knew Chavo wasn't a "player".

Chavo was part of the lucky sperm club. If he wasn't a Guerrero and Eddie hadn't died he would've been gone years ago. He was lucky to even be considered a mid carder. People complain about HHH, Hogan and the rest of the veterans (who can at least truthfully say they put butts in seats) holding young talent back and here is Chavo, who did his best work 15 years ago and never drew a dime on his own, complaining because he had to lose to people and make them look good. Who the fuck does he think he is?

I hate to break it to Chavo but coasting off of your last name is all well and good but the problem is that there are so many second and third generation stars out there who come from families that are better known in the US (where the companies he's worked for are located) than the Guerrero family (yes, even better known than Uncle Eddie, Chavo) doesn't make you stand out and deserve anything.

Does he not understand that he is mostly remembered for Pepe? When was that? What has he done since? Has he tried to stand out? No, he took the easy way and just kept reminding people of someone they loved who died and that he would never be. Why is Vickie so over? The fans know her last name is Guerrero and they think of Eddie, but she doesn't invoke his name constantly. She became her own person and character. What Chavo did was become the Renegade to Eddie's Ultimate Warrior, a cheap copy.

Honestly I'm surprised that Chavo was kept as long as he was and I hope for nothing more than for him to go to TNA and stays exactly what he is now, a jobber. Because as long as he wants to keep being a poor man's Eddie Guerrero instead of making Chavo into something people can care about, that is all he'll be.

ZAH: He sucked in WCW and he sucked in WWE. He wasn't half the performer Eddie was. WWE used him to the best of his abilities. #harshtruth

Drewcifer: I don't know...

When I went to Wrestlemania Axxess earlier this year, Chavo was working an autograph signing booth with Khali. The line was short as Chavo and Khali were due to depart, and someone else (we didn't know who--we just gambled on a short line in hopes we wouldn't get Jack Swagger) was going to take over in 15 minutes.

As soon as WWE security/handlers/whatever came out to hustle the two to the back, Chavo jumped offstage and started shaking hands, posing for pictures, and signing autographs for every fan who was left in that line. He shook my hand and thanked me for coming, then he squatted down to get eye-level with my daughter and high-five her. The whole time, I noticed the handlers were getting frustrated trying to get Chavo to go wherever he was supposed to go. I noticed Khali was getting annoyed, waiting on Chavo to work the line.

I just remembered how classy I thought Chavo was for respecting the fans like that. I wasn't even in the line to meet him, and he still took the time to thank me for being there. I wish him well in his future whatever.

Yeesh, some Chavo love and some Chavo dislike---hate seemed too strong a word.

Honestly? I haven't like Chavo since he was Kerwin White when Dolph Ziggler was his caddy. What? You don't remember such gold as....

....now back to the Raw thread.]

The Green Teabagger: Kelly Kelly's going to win by a landslide.

And its going to suck when she wins

-----JT: So what to do for the 2.5 minutes the match lasts. I'm not used to Diva shit this early in the show.

JohnnyCraze: Kelly Kelly's never been Divas champ Michael Cole....not that I can remember?

The Green Teabagger: Did Cole just claim Kelly Kelly was a former Divas Champion?When the fuck did that happen?

(Writer Note No. 2: At this point, Cole had mentioned a couple of times that Kelly Kelly was a former Divas champion.)

wolfchild: You know what's sad...Watching Kelly Kelly wrestle just shows how much Brooke Adams/Miss Tessmacher has improved.

And great... Kelly Kelly's a champion. Very sad day in wrestling history.

JohnnyCraze: Well, I have to say that Kelly Kelly has worked her ass off. She has definitely improved. She's not better then Beth but she has definitely improved.

--------wolfchild: She has improved. From knowing absolutely nothing about wrestling, to knowing just a little bit more than nothing about wrestling. Sad. She never would have won that match if it wasn't for Maxim. God damn you WWE. You made me get mad at Maxim!

JohnnyCraze: So, either Jack Swagger, Batista or Mysterio's cousin will face Evan Bourne. Anyone but Swagger and he jobs.

TheGreatWhiteDope: Hey, they've learned that Evan Bourne and Sin Cara would work well together. I also like the video package before the voting to show off "Hey, this guy is a high flyer...why not pick the other high flyer instead of the 2 slow, boring muscle-buffed doo-doo heads?"

Yeah, pretty obvious that WWE wanted Sin Cara to win, especially since Mason Ryan is a clod and we've seen Swagger-Bourne done enough for a while...but then.....

JohnnyCraze: What???!!!! Mason Ryan won!!!

wolfchild: Ummm.... What? Mason Ryan?

The Chosen 1: What the fuck? Really?

TheGreatWhiteDope: Maybe its the fans who still want to see Nexus be something other than a gigantic afterthought on a constant basis.

PeterDawson: You know, I can buy Kelly Kelly getting picked just because she is extremely attractive and since it was a bathroom break match no one really cared. But now Mason Ryan? Are they even trying?

wolfchild: If voting is legit, it may lead to WWE's new catchphrase..."You told us. Wrestling doesn't matter. We listened."
***
As we find out a little later.....we may not have been supposed to get Evan Bourne killed by Mason Ryan.
***
The Green Teabagger: Kane vs. Mark Henry

A--Body Slam Match
B--Arm Wrestling
C--Over the top

Can I choose D? Match doesn't happen

JohnnyCraze: Ok, this is a dumb stipulation. Who cares if it's an arm wrestling match or a bodyslam match or a over the top rope match. Who the hell even wants to see Mark Henry in a match??

wolfchild: Okay. 'B' has won three times in a row now... [Writer's note: That's a hint]

JT: Fans choice:

"This is stupid!!!!"

LOL

***
After all of that, R-Truth came out, then Christian came out, then Miz came out in one of the weirdest, funniest talking segments in a while.


***
The Chosen 1: Who makes better hype packages than WWE?

As far as R-Truth goes... When was the last time someone got a one on one title shot at a PPV and then just didn't get a re-match the next month.

The Chosen 1: Cage & Killings....

T.N.A. We Gon' Knock Yo Blocks Awwwwffff

JohnnyCraze: "Maybe in Canada, they don't have little Jimmy's!!!!!!" That is the funniest comment R-Truth has ever said.

TheGreatWhiteDope: R-Truth
Miz
Christian

Debate Contest...come on WWE universe...come on WWE universe

damn

***
Following this, the already mentioned former caddy and former cheerleader Dolph Ziggler defends his newly won US Title against Kofi Kingston. The choices were "2 out of 3 falls" "Vickie Guerrero barred from ringside" and something else I don't remember. I'm just going to pretend it was "Dance Contest" that way no one would vote for it. The 2 out of 3 falls stup won and well.....

The Green Teabagger: You know.....what's stopping the referee from just tossing Vickie Guerrero?

The Chosen 1: I was JUST about to say WHO THE HELL is voting tonight...... but I voted for 2 out of 3 falls.... obviously, the people who are voting are assholes like me who are just trying to pick whatever the least obvious choice is

The Green Teabagger: Ziggler gets a fall during a commercial. Nice job.

The Chosen 1: Ah come on... why wouldn't they just make that a countout victory?

The Chosen 1: How the hell does the whole "Title doesn't change hands by DQ or Count-out" work in a 2 out of 3 falls match?

wolfchild: Way to make 'Power to the People' power to the pointless, WWE...

Average: I always lose interest in these three hour shows. This gimmick episode isn't helping things.

***
The following match was CM Punk defeating Alberto Del Rio and Rey Misterio in a Falls Count Anywhere match that spent all of about thirty or forty seconds outside of the ring to become No. 1 Contender for John Cena's WWE Title. Well, duh! The snow angels would have been pointless if Punk didn't win, but the aftermath....
***
The Green Teabagger: Punk just out and says it?

He's re-signed. LOL

JohnnyCraze: Punk to TNA with the WWE Championship?

--------The Green Teabagger: Punk's not that stupid.

Average: Punk leaves with the belt and that's the end of the brand split.

The Chosen 1: Great.... I just bought the CM Punk Nexus shirt for $30 on Saturday... I knew this was going to happen,.. this whole "honesty" thing was reeking of him bringing up the contract thing

TheGreatWhiteDope: So here's the thing. I kinda hope that Punk isn't bullshitting. WWE was like "well, we need you to put Cena over big on the way out" and Punk said "i know how to do it." so we're doing "The Summer of Punk: The Redux"

Seriously if on August 13th Punk shows up at ROH I'm going to flip the fuck out. The one thing I never got to do was see Punk in ROH. I saw him at my local indy fed a few times...but never in ROH live.

****
The following matches were Cody Rhodes vs. Daniel Bryan in a No Countout match which spent even less time outside of the ring than the previous Falls Count Anywhere match and then Vickie Guerrero vs. Michael Cole in a Dance Contest-----dammit-----Cole was chosen over Booker T and Jerry Lawler.

Then the uber-team of John Cena, Randy Orton, and Alex Riley against R-Truth, Christian, and The Miz in an elimination match (chosen over 20 minute time limit and some other match, I'm going to pretend it was a "Crabs on a Pole" match since they were in Baltimore) Typical formula, blah blah blah, Cena's team won, Orton was pinned by Christian to further that feud but Orton RKO'd Christian allowing Cena to pick up the win)

We weren't done talking about Punk and his announcement of leaving on the 17th of July after the Money in the Bank PPV where he takes on Cena for the WWE Title.
****
TheGreatWhiteDope: So here we go:

Punk beats Cena at MitB. Grabs the mic...does a speech as crowd chants "Thank You Punk" and "Please Don't Go"

Person X who won MitB comes out and gets the title back.

sprout1883: Punk can't be leaving surely

Why put him in the Title match. I can't think of any logical reason to do it if he was. To me they might as well say don't bother watching.

There is no way they give him a win, unless the MITB winner cashes in. Which face it is too obvious if he did win, and then you can't beleive they have the MITB winner fail

Aaron Wood: here's a thing where I think a little bit too much knowledge is both good and bad for us. We heard he was possibly leaving or at least taking time off, ergo, the Internet mindset is that "HE IS DEFINITELY LEAVING AND NEVER COMING BACK!!!!"

And the WWE knows we that sort of know this and are playing into it. But really, when was the last time WWE did an angle based someone legit leaving the company that wasn't the Flair/Michaels "Legend retiring" deal? Can't think of one off the top of my head.

Frankly, I think GWD had it SPOT ON with his MITB scenario, although I'd go a stage further and have Alberto Del Rio be the MITB winner, so you still get Cena vs. Del Rio at Summerslam. Then I could see Punk taking time off, a la Jericho, be subjected to "when are you coming back?" questions every day of his life and then, after some months, at, say, Royal Rumble, he comes back and it's business as usual.

If I'm being totally wrong, and he is just fucking off with no plans of returning, then the fact they are doing this angle should really been as a huge sign of respect to Punk from the WWE, because this is in no way their MO. Guy don't get a build to their leaving. They just go. Hell, even Batista (& JBL) got no build to his leaving.

****
Now back to what I was talking about earlier about the Evan Bourne-Sin Cara match that WWE wanted but instead we got Evan Bourne-Mason Ryan? Well....
****
Aaron Wood: Well, WWE are saying that because of a technical error caused by Kelly Kelly's votes counting for Ryan, that's why he won thevote, when it should have been Sin Cara.

The Chosen 1: I know Wood brought this up but here is the article: http://www.wwe.com/shows/raw/power-to-the-people-technical-problems

Text Voting Inaccurate in Raw's Power to the People
June 21, 2011

Monday's "Power to the People" edition of Raw gave the WWE Universe the ability to choose what they wanted to see on their television screens. Unfortunately, technical difficulties created by an influx of heavy voting traffic resulted in not every one of the more-than 697,000 recorded votes to be properly counted.

As a part of this interactive event, WWE fans were given the option to text A, B or C to 46993 (GOWWE) in order to decide what they wanted to happen during Raw. Things went perfectly at first when text votes selected Kelly Kelly (option B) to take on Brie Bella for the Divas Championship. However, our vote tabulating provider's system became overwhelmed, resulting in these votes to spill into later polls. This technical mishap soon led to Mason Ryan (also option B) being voted into a match against Evan Bourne — even though, as it was later discovered, Sin Cara had received 90 percent of the total votes in WWE.com's Live Chat poll, and should have been Bourne's opponent.

Stand by for more details to be reported by WWE.com throughout the day.


The truth? or Sin Cara damage control?

Probably the truth, it didn't hit me last night but the whole A,B,C thing really was a horrible idea, because in previous years they gave a WWE.com poll which would be 100% accurate since you're actually picking someone's name... this is th same three choices everytime with no real way to figure out which votes are for which poll

The Green Teabagger: From @WWE Twitter:

"You want it? You got it! Sin Cara will face fellow high-flyer Evan Bourne this Monday night on Raw!"

http://www.wwe.com/shows/raw/wwe-grants-sin-cara-bourne-match

***

Huzzah! We're getting the match 'we' wanted. Now can we correct the whole Kelly Kelly as Divas Champion and have Beth Phoenix snap her like a Slim Jim next week to win the butterfly belt? Please? Please?

So we get Bourne-Sin Cara next week. One thing...it's going to be a gimmick match? Why?

Raw Roulette returns next week as WWE is in Las Vegas, Nevada and Shawn Michaels will be there too. I've only got one thing to say about Raw Roulette.

The only way I want RAW Roulette next week is if we finally get a Capture the Midget match....come on, grease up Hornswaggle or Evan Bourne and MAKE THIS HAPPEN!!!

That's it for me, kiddos. It's 1:30 AM as I'm typing this and I'm really REALLY tired and starting to doze off as I type....oh crap, it's 3 AM now and the infomerical for Mr. T's FlavorWave Turbo is on with Mr. T.

I pity the fool who doesn't get a good night's sleep on a Sunday night. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

THE GREAT WHITE DOPE

It's one of the things we, as wrestling fans, get use to. There is a Monday Night Raw every Monday, Impact is every Thursday, Smackdown every Friday, and two pay-per-views a month. Also, one or both of the Hardy Boys are going to do something stupid. When they do it, it'll be very, very public. Trust me, everyone will see it, they'll make sure of it. This week we get to look at Mr. Matt Hardy. And what did he do? Well Matt Dawgs talked about it this past week in T.G.I.F. and our insanity forums got in on it as well.

ZAH

Surprise surprise...Matt Hardy's causing shit in TNA

I didn't even know there were issues with Hardy and TNA. Anybody got more to the story?

James Guttman

Both Dawgs and Mike Johns wrote about it in their articles this week. He was late to shows and was suspended. He's spinning it like he wanted time off because, well, he's a nutball.

The Chosen 1

I wonder what's going to happen when he's fired..

                Mike Johns

So since we've finally gotten passed something that people expect every few months, let's go on to something no one expects. This week a decent amount of people watched Impact on Spike TV. To add to this phenomenon there were a decent amount of people that enjoyed Impact without having that many problems with the show at all. People are also getting behind the new Sting. What new Sting you ask? Well, I'll let them describe him for you.

ZAH

Sweet Jesus...I can't believe that I'm starting an Impact thread.

Quick question, though...how long as Sting been doing this "Nicholson as Joker circa 1989" schtick? Because I'll be honest...I haven't been this entertained by Sting since...I dunno...EVER.

The Chosen 1

aaaaand you've got me interested... looks like it's time for annual 6 month 20 minutes of iMPACT!

I'm ten mins on the DVR. Nutty Sting is pretty good so far.

Nope looks like Ill have to check this out tomorrow

JT

Wow an iMPACT! thread.

ZAH

I'm just doing laundry and nothing else on tonight, so I decided to give Impact a shot. I gotta be honest...I'm not hating this "Bound For Glory tournament" thing at all. I think it's a pretty unique and innovative idea and, thus far, it's being put across in a pretty decent way.

RDLee

Has Azrieal's match happened yet? I just now found Spike TV on my Aunt's cable.

I hope he does well.
Azzy is a humble and deserving guy if there ever was one.

ZAH

I gotta be honest...he was a bit sloppy. I'm sure it was nerves, but it wasn't a great in-ring performance. In addition, he just didn't stand out with in-ring personality like the other two did.

Sorry...I know he's your friend and all...but I'm just trying to give an unbiased opinion.

T-Dog

After one 30-second promo, I'm already a fan of Dakota Darsow.

"I'm cutting the same 'I'm the best thing ever' promo a million guys before me has cut because I'm the best thing ever."

Yep, a real winner right there.

Remember when an ROH fan kept yelling "You fucking suck Azrieal!" at him? Well he still does.

            ZAH

            It's about the delivery, not the message. He showed promo ability...something not easy to come by.

The Chosen 1

It's really a shame how many times I've been burned by TNA... like an abused wife, no matter how good or okay or above average this show is, there is NO part of me that will believe I can follow this on a consistent basis without pulling my hair out...

Oh and I'm watching the Sting-Eric Bischoff confrontation from I THINK a week ago (maybe it was tonight) and I was writing here and realized that Sting and Bischoff speak with the exact same inflection in their voice and similar accents.. they were talking back and forth and I thought it was Sting the whole time

            ZAH

            Couldn't have been from tonight, then. Sting was insanely entertaining. I'd dare say it was the most interesting promo he's ever done. It was just....out there.

                        TXL

                        Yeah, I'm on board with Sting's Joker-type character. I wrote it after his last PPV match too... he's definitely not just there "earning a check," as some have suggested. As Zah said, it's so out there, it is intriguing and entertaining.

Last night's Impact wasn't as good as the previous week's, but I like the BFG idea. Unlike the Top 10 idea, they're locked into this one through the summer, so they can't just abandon it. Dare I say, they probably even have a gameplan.

The all X PPV should be really solid too.

PeterDawson

The BFG tournament does have some flaws in spite of it being a decent way to build up to what they try to bill as being their Wrestlemania. First off which matches get you points seem ambiguous as it seems it can only be against guys in the tournament, which while I guess it makes sense (prevents the booking of squash matches for easy points) does tend to screw people over who aren't in official tournament matches that week. There's also the fact that a guy that wants to fuck you over can do so by getting a DQ in your favor, causing you to lose 10 points.

Think the whole points thing would have worked better if they'd waited until August.

Now I understand that some people could be kind of turned off by this amount of positive Impact talk. People seem to constantly think that it's either always amazing or always bad. Those who think it's always terrible might be ready to throw up in their mouth a bit over the decently positive amount of fanfare we're showing it right now. But when a show is entertaining, sorry, we're going to give it the props it deserves. Let's just hope it keeps up the steam. For those jaded folks here are a few pictures from the infamous James Guttman's Random Insane Wrestling Pics thread.

Who's That?  Oh...you didn't know?

This Week in WWI Forum History

(EDIT: This particular week of "This Week in WWI Forum History" was essentially 3-4 complete pages from the week of June 19^th-26^th 2007. This, if you were not aware, was the week of the death of the Benoit family. While I could have possibly still posted it, after re-reading the section before it was sent to Mr. Guttman I, in full personal choice, decided to delete the section this week. It's not that it isn't an important part of wrestling history or WWI Forum history. If anything it is probably one of the most talked about items ever on the forum. But after re-reading it and watching this particular section go from the news, to the tribute, to the memories, to the speculation, to the truth, to the instinctual reaction I just didn't feel right having it consume a weekly article like Hot Threads. This is about the hot news of wrestling, but it is also here to show some unique views on wrestling and some comedic takes on things. This column is used to show a sense of community that the WWI Forums has that so many other places on the internet lack. At a certain point in this particular section of this thread that sense of community was slightly lost. The World Wrestling Insanity Forums is one of the best places for a wrestling fan to be. It is an up-to-date news at the ready and people who let you speak your mind and will consider your opinion/viewpoint at any time. It's a great place to be. But with having typed out this gigantic editorial note and knowing it was a big deal. If you would really like to see how our community reacted, reached out to each other, and tried to make sense of it all...join the forums and then click the following link.)

 http://s14.zetaboards.com/Wrestling_Insanity/topic/26872/1/

ROWDY RODIMUS

Ever wanted to be a pro wrestler but without having to search through school after school run by guys that say they spent three years with WWF as TV Champion, trying to find the one place where you can get your monies worth? What about the months and months of training to work indie gigs for no money? Is the dream still worth it? If so, I'm sure you can find lots of information about trusted schools by searching the web or talking to members of this very site and I wish you the best. If none of that "work" stuff is your thing, I have just the thing for you. You can have all the fun of doing promos and working out matches for about the same pay you get in TNA without the crippling "demons" that seem to follow a lot of professionals through their life. The best part? It's absolutely free, all it takes is for you to be a member of the forums (And if you are reading this and not a member, do us Hot Threaders a favor and sign up and post. The more threads and comments we have to go through the more fun we can have with the column. Not to mention that you can live forever in the series of tubes we call the Internet if we use your comment. Think about it, IMMORTALITY.) and try out the World Wrestling Insanity E-fed. Here's just a small sample of what has gone on in the past week.

We begin with promos for the June 21 TNT Show

iPad

Sam and the iPad 2 are in a sports bar in Vancouver watching the sixth game of the Stanley Cup Final, the first intermission has just started

Frank: Sam, GM...

iPad2: You're clean?

Sam: Yeah man what was that stuff Hobo Hank threw on... on second thought... I really don't need to know.

iPad2: I bet you're here to find out what we have on tap for next week...

Sam: Speaking of tap... BARTENDER! A Molson for me and my friend here.

iPad2: Well Sam here has made a match with The Orgy of Violence taking on the new comers The Redneck Wrecking Crew... and we seem to have newly self appointed number one contenders for the WWI Tag Team Championships...

Sam: Congrats to Sugar and Spice by the way.

iPad2: Yes congratulations are in order. So since next week we will be in Anchorage, Alaska... I find it fitting that we will have a four team Goldrush Tag Team Tournament to see who will face the tag team champions at Revolution.

Sam: So next week it will be The Redneck Wrecking Crew versus The Orgy of Violence...

iPad2: And Nightmare versus The MidWest Express.

Sam: The winners of those matches will face off in two weeks in Billings, Montana to see who will go on to face the tag team champions.

iPad2: We will get to see if either Victor Hamilton Pendragon or The Green Teabagger will be able to get back on a win streak when they face off next week.

Sam: And our main event of the night will have the now former WWI Utopian Champion exx taking on the woman who beat Victor Hamilton Pendragon in a two out of three falls match last night Hellsinger.

iPad2: WWI Multiverse... don't miss the next exciting edition of Tuesday Night Throwdown, for Anchorage, Alaska...

Sam: LIVE! On The N.E.T.

Nasty Ned

Aboard the private jet the Ned chartered to ALASKA

Ned- Who the hell is in charge of tour booking.....this must be the Middle of No Where Tour.

The Flight Attendant walks by

Ned- Hey GM...you know why we are the #1 contenders....because we are the only tag team Sugar & Spice haven't faced...lets change things up a little bit instead of the same old same old match we've had for the last 4 months....seriously do you not care about ratings. The Midwest Express haven't been in a ring together in almost a year...and you don't put us in the ring with the tag team champs...hell we would have settled for a non title warm up bout.....which we would have dominated..but that's not really the point... no you are gonna bore the TV audience with another tournament. FINE.

Ned looks out the window

Ned- Bring on Nightmare its time to turn them into a DAYDREAM

Hobo Hank (Who'd like you to know has more posts than the Beatles and Elvis. Combined!)

A WWI camera crew with Lee "Turtle" Marshall are walking down a dark ally in Anchorage

Cameraman: What are we doing here? This place is full of bums.

Hobo Hank pops out scaring the crap out of the cameraman

Hobo Hank: Who you callin' a bum you little shit? I'm a hobo! Get it right before I kick you ass.

Turtle: Sorry Hank... whispering to the cameraman didn't know there was a difference.

Hobo Hank: What was that?

Turtle: Nothing, Just thinking out loud. So someone in the WWI offices recognized you and has offered you a WWI contract... May I ask if you have decided to take the offer?

Hobo Hank: Yes I've decided to take the offer, and I can't wait to teach some of these young punks in WWI a lesson in pain. I'm no refined wrestler and I wouldn't know a wrist lock from a wrist watch... but I do like hurting people.

Turtle: So you said when you met Frank...

Hobo Hank: Who?

Turtle: That interviewer that you threw that liquid on?

Hobo Hank: Oh that little turd, yeah I remember him. What about him?

Turtle: You mentioned you where a great wrestler in your day.

Hobo Hank: And I'm still a great wrestler... well maybe wrestler is to loose of a word, I'm a great brawler... just like the greats like the Brooklyn Brawler.

Turtle: The Brooklyn Brawler was one of the greats?

Hobo Hank: You know I'm fixin' to punch your lights out if you don't shut the hell up.

The WWI is about to see one of the best all around fighters ever...

Turtle: I just have one question... how do you plan to get from show to show?

Hobo Hank: Don't you never mind how I get around, that's none of your business. All you have to know is that I'm gonna school punks like The Green Teabagger... what kind of name is that anyway? Sounds like something I found at the bottom of my shopping cart yesterday... anyway and people like Hellsinger and I don't care if you're a giant like Mason Case or Markus Ramius... you can flaunt your money all you want but it won't save you from a good ol fashion ass whoppin'

Now get out of my face... my rat is almost done and no I'm not invitin' you to dinner.

Turtle looks like he's about to loose his lunch as they walk off

In all honesty, I have no idea what these people are talking about. However, with that said I can't wait to see what is going to happen. See what happens when you get creative people involved in their own characters? WWE and TNA could take a page out of these WWI Members books and see how interesting things can be when you let the talent help promote themselves (without giving the fans the finger when one of them does and gets over by not using said person, yes that is a shot at WWE and how they are treating Zack Ryder) and be involved in developing things?

With last week's sudden and unexpected conclusion to the Canadian Bulldog and Aaron "Suck" Wood saga, what does the future hold for the leader of the iWo? Will he be allowed back in Tijuana? (It's a long story) Will his lawsuit be settled by Binder & Binder? (Another long story) Will he have the #1 Investigative Journalist of WWI.com, Rowdy Rodimus, as a guest on Complete and Utter Bulldog? (The first few lines of Vince McMahon's theme song comes to mind) Whatever it is, I'm sure of two things:

1.      It will be absolutely, balls to the wall hilarious

2.      It will be on a site perfectly named for it

Let's see what America's Favorite Canadian (six years in a row according to the Peeps Choice Awards. Christian was being held back by the promoter of the show) is has planned for us next. But until then we were treated to Bulldog's exclusive Breaking News article:

Hulk Hogan Refuses To Put Sick Child Over In Heaven

http://bit.ly/iM6eRC

Also this week were treated to a rare visit by WWI's favorite Uncle, Ralph who gave us this heartwarming and touching poem that is sure to be looked at as an American Classic years from now:

"I Watch Impact Drunk" - A Poem By Uncle Ralph

http://bit.ly/iLl77X

On a serious note earlier this week Jackass star Ryan Dunn was killed in a drunk driving accident. Now that usually isn't the kind of thing that is covered here on the Insanity, but that's what makes Columnist Dan Crocker's article about the dangers of drinking and driving all the more important for everyone to read. Also, after reading it I wasn't able to say what I felt to Dan afterwards, so I'd like to do it now if no one objects. Dan, I am truly sorry about your loss. I don't know how I would get through if that happened to me but thank you for sharing the story of your brother and know that if anything good can come of what happened it's that it might save a life.

Crocker! A Serious Look At Drunk Driving, Public Reaction, and The Death of Ryan Dunn http://bit.ly/jtzfmL

Well WWI Galaxy, that is about all from me this week. I've been babysitting seemingly 24/7 for the last four days and my internet has crapped out on me about half of that time due to the cable company putting in new lines in the area. However, I do have one more piece of business to finish and that is this weeks Stan Lee Memorial 'Nuff Said Award.

This week the 'Nuff Said Award goes to a man who goes by many names. Most of which can't be printed in a family friendly article. Needless to say, the winner has given a response to someone in a simple way that sums up what many of us have wanted to say for a long time. So congratulations, Aaron Wood for being the latest recipient of the Stan Lee Memorial 'Nuff Said Award for this exchange:

Shooting

Thank god that Punk is leaving. Hopefully someone good takes his place (bring up Jinder Mahal from FCW that would be awesome). Why would anyone think that giving him the title is good idea? The guy is leaving and whatever happens at MitB won't matter in a few months anyway.

Aaron Wood

So, not only still a moron, but behind the times too. Mahal's on Smackdown. Has been for weeks.