WWE One Night Stand Real Time Report: Match By Match Coverage
By Mike Rickard II
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1. Falls Count Anywhere Match: Jeff Hardy vs. Umaga: Umaga is givng Jeff the ol' hairy eyeball before the match. Jeff charges into an elbow from Umaga. Umaga whips Jeff into the corner and Hardy pops out like a pinball. Umaga picks Jeff up by the hair and goes to throw him in the corner. However Jeff counters and jumps out of the corner, hitting the Whisper in the Wind. Jeff tries another move off the top ropes but Umaga catches him and hits a Black Hole Slam, planting Jeff into the mat. Cover but Hardy somehow kicks out. Umaga charges Jeff and Jeff pulls the rope down, sending Umaga out of the ring. Jeff dives out of the ring, hitting a cross body block and covering Umaga (it's falls count anywhere!). Umaga kicks out and throws Jeff into the security barrier. Umaga begins brawling with Jeff outside the ring, taking him towards the entrance. There's plenty of plunder at ringside (the set has a construction theme) and Umaga takes advantage of it, dropping chairs on Jeff. Jeff gets a reprieve when Umaga charges at Jeff and hits a wall instead of Jeff. Jeff grabs a fire extinguisher and sprays the Samoan Bulldozer. Umaga and Jeff wander backstage where Jeff sprays the extinguisher again. Umaga swings a chair at Jeff but hits a wall instead. Jeff climbs a flight of stairs as Umaga follows after him. Jeff slides down the stair's rail and elbows Umaga. Cover on Umaga for a two count. The two continue brawling in the Mezzinine in the arena. Umaga whips Hardy into a garbage can then covers him for a two count. The carnage continues as Jeff and Umaga go outside and begin brawling in ther parking lot. The Samoan Bulldozer throws Jeff into the side of a tractor trailer. Umaga throws Jeff again, this time bouncing his head off of the rear door of a tractor trailer. Showing tremendous resilence, Jeff gets up and throws Umaga's head into the door. Jeff elbows Umaga after a failed pin attempt. Jeff climbs a ladder on the back of a WWE tractor trailer as Umaga follows after him. Jeff knocks Umaga off the ladder, sending him fling onto the pavement. Jeff hits a Swanton off the truck and covers Umaga for the pin.
WINNER: Jeff Hardy (by pinfall). VIDEO: Highlights from tonight's spotfest. SmackDown! announcers Michael Cole and Mick Foley discuss tonight's Stretcher Match between Batista and Shawn Michaels. VIDEO: Pre-taped segment with Mick Foley showing the fans how a Stretcher Match works. To win the match, you must put your opponent on a stretcher and slide the stretcher (with the wrestler on it) across the "finish line". Shawne Merriman from the San Diego Chargers is seen at ringside. ECW announcers Tazz and Mike Adamle discuss tonight's Singapore Cane Match. VIDEO: Highlights of the Big Show making his statement by laying out the four men involved in tonight's Singapore Cane Match. Big Show inserted himself into the match, hoping to win it and get an ECW World title shot. 2. Singapore Cane Match: CM Punk vs. Chavo Guerrero (w. Bam Nely) vs. Tommy Dreamer vs. John Morrison vs the Big Show: Big Show finds himself assaulted by all four of his opponents. Unfortunately for them, the Big Show isn't easy to take out and he lays out all four of his opponents. Tommy Dreamer gets bodyslammed by the Big Show. An opening develops when Show misses an elbowdrop and his opponents a lightning fast assault on the big man. Frog Splash by Chavo Guerrero stuns the big man, giving the other four competitors a chance to grab the canes affixed to poles in each corner. It's a four on one cane attack on Show as he's knocked out of the ring. With the Big Show momentarily out of it, it's every man for himself. It's a wild brawl outside the ring with Chavo Guerrero swinging a cane and hitting San Diego player Merriman. When Merriman gets his bearings back, CM Punk hands him a cane and Merriman blasts Chavo with it. Outside the ring, the Big Show grabs steel steps and goes after John Morrison. Morrison hits a drop toe hold and Big Show falls headfirst onto the steps. Back in the ring, CM Punk tries the GTS on Dreamer but Dreamer counters and puts Punk in a Half Boston Crab. Outside the ring, Big Show is bleeding and he's mad. He grabs a cane and breaks it over the back of John Morrison. There's a garbage cane filled with cans and Show grabs it Dreamer, Punk, and Guerrero face the wrath of the giant as he blasts them with the arsenal of canes. Dreamer tries to slow Show down with a cane shot but gets nowhere. Big Show has Dreamer in the corner and takes his time grabbing a cane. He could take all the time in the world as Dreamer is just about out of it. Big Show blasts Dreamer with the cane then plants a foot on Dreamer for the cover. WINNER: Big Show (pins Dreamer). BACKSTAGE: Kane is seen backstage watching the match. VIDEO: Highlights from the cane match. VIDEO: Hype for tomorrow's edition of Monday Night Raw. BACKSTAGE: Todd Grisham interviews WWE chairman Vincent Kennedy McMahon about his announcement last week that he's giving away a million dollars (of his own money). Vince calls the giveaway McMahon's Million Dollar Mania and tells Grisham he'll explain more tomorrow on Raw. Ron Simmons shows up for his obligatory DAMN! 3. First Blood Match: John Bradshaw Layfield vs. John Cena: Before the match, JBL takes the turnbuckle pad off, Cena follows suit. JBL and Cena start the match off with an exhange of blows. JBL gets the upper hand but Cena bounces back with a clothesline. The action spills out of the ring briefly before Cena throws JBL into the ring. Cena hits JBL with a barrage of punches but he barely slows JBL down. JBL tosses Cena out of the ring then punches away. Since it's a First Blood Match, it's a wise move to land as many punches as possible since all you need is one lucky shot and you can bust your foe open. JBL continues brawling with Cena outside but he hasn't busted him open yet. Cena mounts a brief comeback but JBL stops him cold with a big boot. Cena grabs a chair and props Cena's head against the steel post. JBL swings the chair wildly and Cena manages to duck down. Cena goes after Layfield but walks into a big punch. Cena is down as the referee checks to see if he's busted open yet. Amazingly, he's not. Back in the ring, Cena is down on the mat. JBL grabs a microphone and pounds Cena in the head with it. Still no blood. JBL is standing over Cena and swings the micrphone but Cena ducks it and launches his offense, hitting two shoulderbutts in a row off of the ropes. Bodyslam on Cena. Cena looks like he's going for the Five Knuckle Shuffle. Cena hits the move then goes for the FU on JBL. JBL is close to the ropes and holds on, freeing himself from the hold. Bradshaw clotheslines Cena with the top rope, putting an end to Cena's counteroffensive. JBL throws Cena's head into the ringpost and Cena bounces to the ground. The referee checks Cena's head but still no blood! Cena's head must be made of concrete. JBL grabs the steel steps and throws them at Cena. Fortunately for Cena, JBL misses. Wasting no time, JBL throws Cena's head into the security barrier. The action continues outside the ring with JBL trying a DDT on the steel steps but Cena blocks the hold and JBL lands headfirst on the steps. No blood on JBL so Cena swings a microphone at him. Still no blood so Cena begins grinding JBL's face in the steel steps. The referee calls "No Blood" on JBL. Cena tosses JBL into the ring and grabs a chair on his way in. JBL counters the chair shot and throws Cena's head into an exposed turnbuckle. Cena crumbles to the mat as the referee checks the Chain Gang Soldier. Still no blood! Cena bounces off the ropes and drives JBL's head into a chair. While JBL is down, he grabs a steel chain he hid in a towel. Cena gets hit in the bread basket with the chain. Amazingly, Cena is able to pick JBL up for the FU but his ribs are hurt from the chain to the gut and he collapses. JBL follows up with a boot to Cena's face and Cena staggers back into the ropes, trapping himself in the ropes. Cena's arms are stuck in the ropes, giving JBL time to do whatever he wants. JBL grabs a bullrope and brings it into the ring. Looks like a Texas style whipping but looks can be deceiving. JBL gets too close and Cena kicks him, slipping out of the ropes. Cena grabs the chain and applies the STFU with the chain around JBL's throat. JBL coughs blood and the referee calls for the bell as soon as he sees it. WINNER: John Cena After the match, Cena raises the chain over his head. VIDEO: Hype video for June 29th's Night of Champions PPV. BACKSTAGE: Batista is greeted by Randy Orton who wishes "The Animal" good luck against Shawn Michaels. Batista wants to know the real reason he's there and Orton tells him that they could end up together on the same roster. Orton suggests Batista consider "putting the band back together" but Batista walks away without commenting.
VIDEO: Highlights from the Triple Threat Match on
Raw two weeks ago between Beth Phoenix, Melina, and Mickie James. 4. I Quit Match: "The Glamazon" Beth Phoenix vs. Melina: Phoenix backs Melina against the ropes and starts talking trash. Melina shoves her back but "The Glamazon" puts her in a bear hug, punishing the challenger. Melina gets out only to fall into a backbreaker by Phoenix. Phoenix puts Melina in a Bow and Arrow (an over the knee backbreaker), looking for a submission but Melina knees Phoenix in the face several times, breaking free. Melina applies a Grapevine bridging inverted STF but Phoenix is able to slide to the edge of the ring and slip out. Phoenix puts Melina in a backbreaker but she can't get a submission. Phoenix tries additional submission holds but Melina refuses to give up, frustrating "The Glamazon". Melina is whipped into the ropes but she counters with a flying head scissors, sending Phoenix head first into the turnbuckle. Melina adds further punishment by driving Phoenix' shoulder into the steel post. Melina focuses on Phoenix' shoulder then applies an armbar to the former Woman's Champion. Phoenix looks like she's in trouble with Melina applying the hold in the center of the ring. Phoenix tries to power out but Melina rolls her up and turns the hold into an armbreaker. Melina wraps her legs around Phoenix' head, hoping to immobilize her further but Phoenix uses her strength to stand up and slam Melina down into the mat. Phoenix regroups and applies a seated Surfboard to Melina. Phoenix loses her grip and lets go but she grabs Melina again, this time grabbing Melina's chin, turning it into a modified Camel Clutch . Melina has nowhere to go and finally gives up, no doubt not wanting to risk permanent injury.
WINNER: Beth Phoenix
BACKSTAGE: John Cena is talking to a doctor when Mickie James asks for some private time. James suggests they trade submission holds. It looks like love is in the air when Mike Adamle shows up, fresh out of the bathroom. He greets the two crazy kids and invites them for a night out in Tijuana. The two decline and talk more about working on some holds together. Mike Adamle tells them they make a good couple but the two deny there's any romance. SmackDown! announcers Michael Cole and Edge talk about the upcoming match between Batista and HBK. VIDEO: Hype video for tonight's bout between Batista and HBK. 5. Stretcher Match: "The Heartbreak Kid" Shawn Michaels vs. "The Animal" Batista: HBK charges Batista and peppers him with punches but "The Animal" quickly slams him down to the mat. Michaels gets thrown out of the ring by Batista, bouncing off of the stretcher at ringside. Batista slams Michaels on the stretcher. Michaels puts the brakes on Batista's offense by countering a move and slamming Batista into the stretcher. Michaels follows up by slamming Batista into the steel steps then clobbering Batista with a kick to the head. Michaels takes the stretcher and wheels it into Batista, slamming it into "The Animal's" ribs. Seeing a good thing, Michaels slides the stretcher into Batista's head. Michaels puts Batista on the stretcher and tries to roll him out but "the Animal" knees Michaels in the head repeatedly, breaking free. Batista picks Michaels up for a Batista Bomb but Michaels wiggles out. Batista picks Michaels up and slams his back into the mat apron. Batista keeps his arms wrapped around Michaels but Michaels surprises Batista with what looks like a chokehold and nearly chokes Batista out long enough to get him down on the stretcher and wheel him over the finish line. Batista recover and throws Michaels into the ring, flooring him with a clothesline. Irish whip on Michaels as Batista follows in with a clothesline. Michaels gets powerslammed by Batista. "The Animal" stands over the fallen Michaels, looking to finish him off. Batista underestimates his foe though and when he charges him, Michaels counters and Batista flies into the turnbuckle. Batista is down as Michaels climbs the ropes and hits the flying elbowsmash. Michaels goes for the Superkick but Batista counters and Michaels floors him. Batista goes for the Batista Bomb but Michaels grabs the ropes, blocking the hold. Michaels hits a Superkick out of nowhere, sending Batista over the top rope and onto the stretcher. Batista looks like he's knocked out. Michaels goes to roll Batista over the finish line but Batista falls off. Bad break for Michaels as he looks like he had the match won. Michaels picks Batista up and puts him on the stretcher but Batista knees his way out. Michaels slams the stretcher into Batista then tries again but "The Animal" uses his strength to stop Michaels. Batista uses the stretcher like a see-saw and slams Michaels in the face. Michaels is thrown in the ring and Batista wastes no time, hitting the spear. Batista Bomb and Michaels looks like he's KOed. Batista grabs Michaels by the arm and drags him out of the ring onto the stretcher. Out of nowhere, Chris Jericho shows up and begins jawing at Shawn Michaels. Apparently Jericho is trying to encourage Michaels. The break in the action gives Michaels time to get off the stretcher and he rolls into the ring. A groggy Michaels tries to kick Batista but he's too weak. Batista talks trash (telling him "I don't love you and I'm not sorry") before delivering a second Batista Bomb to Michaels. Batista puts Michaels on the stretcher and rolls him towards the finish line. Jericho shows up and tries to encourage Michaels, inadvertently (?) stopping Batista from rolling Michaels out. Batista grabs some steel steps and gives Michaels a spinebuster on it. No matter how resilient Michaels is, there's only so much the human body can take and Michaels finds himself wheeled over the finish line. WINNER: Batista VIDEO: Hype video for the latest "Stone Cold" Steve Austin DVD. VIDEO: Hype video for tonight's "Last Man Standing" Match between Triple H and Randy Orton. 6. WWE Championship (Last Man Standing Match): "The Legend Killer" Randy Orton vs. Triple H (Champion)-Triple H starts strong by throwing Orton into the steel steps. "The Game" manhandles Orton outside the ring, slamming his head into the security barrier. Triple H throws Orton into the corner and chokes him down with his boot. Triple H continues punishing Orton, choking him on the ring ropes. Triple H grabs Orton and whips him into the corner, sending Orton's shoulder into the ringpost. Triple H repeats the move, slamming Orton's shoulder into the ringpost again. Triple H punches away at Orton, leading to the referee to ask him to back off (why? It's a Last Man Standing Match). Orton hits a dropkick on Triple H but Triple H shrugs the move off and throws Orton out of the ring again. Triple H grabs Orton b the arm and puts him on an announce table. Triple H punches away at Orton. Triple H has Orton on the table and goes for the Pedigree but Orton counters, nearly hitting the DDT. The two continue grappling on the table and Orton beats him to the punch, hitting the rope-hung (or in this case table-hung) spike DDT. With Helmsley down, Orton pulls the protective mat off the ground and goes after Triple H. Triple H manages to counter and flings Orton into the ringpost. Back in the ring, Orton blindsides Triple H with a knee to the back. Orton brings the steel steps into the ring and clobbers Triple H with them. Hunter goes down and the referee begins counting. Orton rolls outside the ring during the count and brings in an extension cord. Helmley beats the count and gets to his feet, slugging Orton. The two brawl with Orton getting the upper hand and managing to get the extension cord wrapped around Hunter's throat. Orton chokes Helmsely with the cord until Hunter isn't moving. The referee starts the ten count again as Orton watches on. Orton stands over Hunter, waiting to see if he will get up. HHH beats the count and Orton goes for the RKO. However Triple H scoops Orton and throws him over the top rope with Orton landing hard outside the ring. The referee immediately begins counting Orton. Triple H breaks the count by going after Orton outside the ring. Triple H knocks Orton down and the count begins again. Once again, Orton beats the count but as the count is being made, Triple H grabs a sledgehammer. As Orton is getting up, Triple H blasts Orton with the sledgehammer. Orton falls down as the referee starts the count again. Orton fails to get up this time though, giving Triple H the victory. WINNER: Triple H VIDEO: Highlights of Triple H throwing Orton over the top rope. After his loss, Randy Orton staggers back to the dressing room. Michael Cole and Mick Foley discuss tonight's main event between the Undertaker and Edge. VIDEO: Hype video for tonight's Edge/Undertaker TLC Match. 7. World Heavyweight Championship (Tables, Ladders, and Chairs Match): Edge vs. the Undertaker-Undertaker starts the match by punching Edge and manhandling him around the ring. The "Dead Man" continues slugging away at Edge, choking him in the corner. Undertaker goes for "Old School" and hits the move on Edge. Undertaker throws Edge out of the ring. Undertaker sets up a ladder but Edge gets back in the ring and hits a baseball slide on Undertaker, knocking the ladder into the Undertaker. That barely slows Undertaker down as he grabs a ladder and drives it into Edge. With Edge down, 'Taker sets up a table next to two tables Edge placed on top of each other. There are now two tables stacked next to each other two high. Edge has had time to recover and he attacks Undertaker, knocking him down outside the ring. With 'Taker down, Edge goes in the ring and sets up a ladder. However "The Dead Man" is able to make it into the ring and stop Edge. Undertaker goes for "Snake eyes" on Edge but Edge counters and Undertaker flies into a ladder set up in the corner. Edge tries to capitalize but Undertaker whips him into a ladder set up in another corner. Undertaker rolls out of the ring and throws a ladder into the ring. Undertaker sets the ladder up and goes for the championship belt hanging over the ring. Undertaker finds himself flying after Edge knocks the ladder over. Edge crawls towards a ladder and sets it up in the corner. He turns to see the Undertaker standing behind him. 'Taker picks Edge up and tosses him into the ladder. 'Taker charges Edge, kicking him and sending him into the ladder yet again. Edge crumbles to the mat and rolls out of the ring. The "Dead Man" follows him out and hits Edge with a steel chair. The Undertaker then puts Edge on the mat apron, draping his head off the edge. Undertaker goes for a leg drop on Edge but Edge has the wherewithall to grab a chair and 'Taker lands hard on the chair. Edge then clips Undertaker's leg outside the ring. Edge sets two ladders up, straddling them between the ring and the security barrier. Undertaker finds himself the victim of a low blow from Edge and he crumbles to the ground. Edge follows up with a steel chair shot to Undertaker's head, flooring him once again. Still, you can never count out the Undertaker out and Edge has wrestled him enough times to know this. Edge grabs the chair and swings it again, blasting the "Dead Man" a second time. Edge places Undertaker on a table and jumps off one of the announce tables onto the Undertaker, delivering an elbowsmash that sends Undertaker through the table. Edge goes up the ladder towards the championship belt. Incredibly, the Undertaker is able to get in the ring and stop Edge but he pays the price when Edge hits the Spear on 'Taker. Edge slams a ladder on Undertaker, continuing to dish out the punishment. Edge sets up a ladder as Undertaker struggles to get to his feet. Edge helps 'Taker back down by delivering a brutal chair shot to him. The Undertaker looks like he's down as Edge stands over him with a steel chair. Fortunately for "The Dead Man", he's able to hit a low blow on Edge, giving himself a reprieve. 'Taker gets to his feet and grabs Edge, chokeslamming him outside the ring and through the two ladders set between the ring and the security barrier. Undertaker looks like the match is his as he climbs the ladder to the championship belt. However Edge's henchmen Ryder and Hawkins show up and stop 'Taker. It's beatdown time as Ryder and Hawkins punch away at the Undertaker, setting him up on a table. 'Taker fights back and slings Ryder out of the ring, sending him through a table. Rinse and repeat as Undertaker sends Hawkins out and through a table. The Undertaker has dispatched of Ryder and Hawkins but Edge has recovered and he hits the Spear on 'Taker, sending "The Dead Man" out of the ring. Edge climbs the ladder and he's in reach of the belt when Undertaker gets in the ring and follows him up. The Undertaker grabs Edge and delivers the Last Ride off of the ladder and through two tables. The Undertaker gets to his feet and slowly climbs the ladder. However the Undertaker's weakened knee slows him down, giving Bam Nely and Chavo Guerrero time to run into the ring and stop him. Chavo and Bam Nely go after "The Phenom" with steel chairs but the Undertaker gets out of the way and Nely slams the chair into Guerrero. 'Taker knocks Nely down and goes back up the ladder. The Undertaker is near the top of the ladder when Edge gets up and knocks the ladder over, sending the Undertaker out of the ring and through the four tables set up at ringside. Edge climbs the ladder as the Undertaker lies outside the ring. The Undertaker lies near the broken tables as Edge makes his way to the top and retrieves the belt. WINNER: Edge (New World Champion!)
After the match,
SmackDown! General Manager Vicki Guerrero comes out to congratulate her fiancee on his championship victory. The rest of La Familia celebrate as the Undertaker is still laying in the wreckage. Alphabetical Listing of Guests You Can Hear on ClubWWI.com : Aaron
Aguliera Christian
Cage Jackie
Gayda Chalie
Haas B.G.
James Bruno
"Harvey Wippleman" Lauer One
Man Gang Diamond
Dallas Page Sylvester
Terkay
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