Based on nothing more than second hand information, vague memories, and complete nonsense, I will review something that I've never seen. Then you can go see it and tell me about it. Then you can go to hell....
My sister-in-law tells me I have a substance abuse problem. I tell her that there's no substance to me at all and I'm actually really shallow. I grab her ass to prove this point and then play this song. ..
So I kept asking everyone at the table, "Who is Mickey Nimage?!
Who the hell is Mickey Nimage?!"
But all anyone said was, "Please, mister, don't hurt us."
Long story short - I walked into the wrong house.
Ever notice how Dusty Rhodes's kids are in good shape for the most part?
Think that's because he ate all the food in the house and left nothing for them but vegetables and beans?
His partner is slimy Wade Barrett.
When Wade Barrett has to grease a cookiesheet, he headbutts the pan.
So UFC 121 - "The Match, The Movie" is on Saturday.
UFC does Saturday night PPVs because they like for people to get drunk, have fun, and watch them.
WWE and the other company do PPVs on Sundays because they like people to watch them when they're all pissed off about school or work the next day.
Over the past five years, you've been touched by our Crazy Uncle Ralph. Sorry about that. The foul mouthed boozehound joined the Insanity right at the start...whether we liked it or not. His original spot on the site involved the most mismatched wrestling roundtable ever assembled. It was October 16, 2005 and the world was about to experience the first ever editon of Sandow, Rickard, and Uncle Ralph...
So Matt Dawgs calls me up, right?
He's had a bad week.
His owner ran away or something and he's all, "Ralph.
Can you do a column or something for me on Friday?
Oh, by the way, I wear pink panties."
I go yeah.
I'm good like that.
Yo. How are ya? Good. Good. Rickard's not here tonight, but I am. I'm here to get Extreme like ice cream on a tamborine. You ready for a little real time ECDub? Me too. Stick witcha Uncle Ralph. I'll give ya the ups, downs, ins, and outs of this crazy little thing called ECW on Sci-Fi Network.
Yeah, so anyway, I had a big welcome home party the other day and James Guttman goes, "Yo. You down with a little TNA?" Like a putz, I figured he was offering to take his uncle to a strip club or whatnot. You know. Get a little sumpin, sumpin. Silly me. He meant TNA. Total Nonstop Action. The wrestling company.