Welcome to WWI's ongoing coverage of Monday Night Raw. This week Raw is live from the Joe Louis Arena in Detroit, Michigan.
Raw is on the bumpy road to Judgment Day, which is coming up in less than a week.
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Last Monday, King William the GM had been a little carried away with the blackout button.
Jim Ross and Jerry "The King" Lawler welcomed viewers to the show as the show faded to black almost immediately. When the lights came back on, Regal was in the ring with Lillian, who was singing "God Save the Queen." That got a lot of boos, although Lillian sang it beautifully.
Regal reacted to the "USA" chants by threatening to throw people out. He called for security to throw out two members of the audience. Mickie James came running down to ringside and protested. It was her brother and a friend who'd been singled out for the heave-ho.
Mickie followed Regal back into the ring and the two argued. Only one problem -- he had a mic and she didn't.
No matter. John Cena came out and Mickie was forgotten and finally disappeared. Cena was cheered since everyone seemed booed-out from the Regal drama.
Cena wanted to talk to Regal man-to-man. He thought Regal was messing up. Regal countered that Mr. McMahon likes what he's doing. Cena said that didn't matter, since Mr. McMahon is insane. Cena had brought along some e-mails from fans angered by Regal's lack of respect for the fans.
A troubled Regal asked if that was how the fans truly felt, then promised not to turn out the lights tonight. Regal felt Cena wanted some revenge and he said Cena would be facing Randy Orton tonight. Cena wasn't buying it and figured that JBL would be tossed into the mix somehow. Regal promised that there were no tricks up his sleeve. (Cena should have looked to see if Regal's fingers were crossed behind his back.)
Regal started to leave and Cena stopped him. He cautioned Regal against continuing to mess up. Cena thought if Lillian sang "Respect" it would make up for singing "God Save the Queen" earlier. It did.
(Commercial break)
**Bagpipe advisory**
Rowdy Roddy Piper headed to the ring and threw the timekeeper out of his chair so he could have a place to sit.
(1) World Tag Team Championship Match: Santino & Carlito vs. Cody Rhodes & Hardcore Holly.
A little pre-match staredown between Piper and Santino. Holly and Santino started things off and it didn't take long for Santino to start with the dirty tricks. Cody tagged in and pinned an inattentive Santino for the win. YAY! Cody and Holly keep the titles and Santino goes home with a headache. Piper got into the ring and celebrated with the winners.
(Commercial break)
Time for Mr. Kennedy, who had something to say. As usual. He acknowledged that he had a big mouth, and then used it to shout his name at the top of his lungs.
(2) Mr. Kennedy vs. Snitksy.
Lawler said Snitsky had "summer teeth -- some 're yellow, some 're brown." After a lot of clubbering by Snitksy, Kennedy managed to pin big old sweaty Snitksy for the win.
(Commercial break)
Todd Grisham started to interview Santino, who had some heavily accented words for Piper. He was going to hunt the Hot Rod down.
Mickie thanked Cena for helping her earlier. She invited Cena to go out with her brother and her friends later. He declined, sounding a lot like "Dragnet's" monotone Joe Friday as he listed the reasons why he couldn't go out. Then Cena said he was just kidding and would love to got out with them.
(Commercial break)
(3) Diva Tag Team Match: Melina & Beth Phoenix vs. Mickie James & Maria.
Mickie had Melina in a pinning predicament and the Beth-azon turned on her heel and walked up the ramp, leaving Melina alone to fight the good fight. One would think that the Beth-azon is still mad at Melina for accidentally hitting her with a boot last week.
(Commercial break)
Chris Jericho came out to a good pop from the crowd. Jericho addressed the issue of Shawn Michaels knee injury. Jericho hadn't believed HBK's injury was real, but last week HBK had super kicked John Morrison to save Jericho from a fate worse than a pin. Jericho apologized sincerely to Michaels and said if he wanted to call their PPV off, he'd understand.
Shawn Michaels hobbled out and threw his cowboy hat to a lucky fan in the crowd. HBK said there was no need to apologize, then admitted to faking the injury. Jericho thought HBK was trying to play mind games and said he didn't believe him. HBK insisted he wasn't hurt. Then Jericho started to get angry, whereupon HBK super kicked him in the chops.
HBK told Jericho to trust him -- he was not hurt.
(Commercial break)
Some new entrance music started and an older and wiser Jeff Hardy came out to cheers, chants and a standing ovation. (It was Jeff Hardy, v2.) Hardy said it was good to be back and that he'd made a mistake and he'd paid for it. But now that he's back, he has a lot of things to do. Suddenly, his mic went dead.
King William came out and said no one wanted to hear his mea culpa. In fact, Regal thought he should be punished for his sins.
(4) Jeff Hardy vs. Umanga.
So be it, seemed to be Hardy's answer. Unfortunately, he was getting bulldozed by Umaga. Somehow Hardy managed to win it with a Whisper in the Wind. J.R. said it wasn't a whisper, it was a roar.
(Commercial break)
Yo, yo, yo…it's Cryme Tyme.
(5) Tag Team Match: Cryme Tyme (Shad & JTG) vs. Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch.
There was a chubby guy in a Hogan costume at ringside and Lawler called him "The Bulk." Lawler was in fine form tonight.
Decent back and forth action, although Cryme Tyme seemed to be a little rusty at times. Murdoch made the winning pin and Cade picked up a mic. He was pleased that the two of them were back on a roll. He thought maybe Trevor's singing had something to do with it. He asked Trevor to sing their victory song. He's good! The audience seemed to be getting into the song, then out of the blue, Cade knocked him out cold, then punched him again as he started to get up. The audience told Cade he sucked. Yes, he does. But I like the feud that brewing.
(Commercial break)
A bunch of divas were standing around "acting" (and I use the term loosely). Melina wanted to know why the Beth-azon had left her all alone in the ring. The response was a beat down from dainty Beth. This segment was painful to watch. Very amateurish.
Grish was attempting to interview somebody again. That never works. Anyway, this time it was Randy Orton, who boasted that the Age of Orton would be on display Sunday night when he won back the title. He was the smartest, the best…blah, blah blah.
(Commercial break)
This was apparently the night for new theme music, since Orton had a new one, too. I like it; it suits him.
(6) Randy Orton vs. John Cena.
The crowd was in Cena's corner for once. Good action, but that's to be expected. These two give nothing less than 100%. The crowd was energized and unbelievably into this match.
(Commercial break)
When Orton was about to give Cena an RKO, Cena was ready to finish him off.
Just as Cena had suspected, JBL found his way into the ring. Regal had made JBL a substitute referee. A quick kick to the face by Orton, followed by the world's fastest three-count, and Orton took the win. At that point, it turned into a bit of a brawl til Triple H's music hit and he headed to the ring to even the sides. Cena and JBL battled into the audience, while Orton pounded on Triple H in the ring. A steel cage began to lower as Orton continued to beat on Triple H. Lots of Triple H chants, and he rallied with a spine buster.
Triple H climbed to the top of the cage and looked down at Orton who was now sprawled on the floor.
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I liked tonight's show. It had an old-school feel to it, with storylines being advanced and personalities being developed. I wouldn't mind a country music gimmick for Murdoch if it meant he'd sing every week.
One other thing I liked--the show ended on time, ya know, like most shows do.