12-15-06

“I'd give you all, and have none.”

Boo-yah, here we go!!

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Item # 1 – Where’s the time gone?

Goddamnit.  Between working 11-hour days and coming home to a wife who’s desperate to get an hour of “escape time”, there’s simply no time this week (unfortunately) for a normal column.  In fact, I haven’t watched a single minute of wrestling all week long.

Crazy...I know.

I loaded-up on Ring of Honor last week and I even downloaded the TNA PPV but I haven’t watched any of it yet nor have I watched any WWE at all.  Needless to say, I can’t talk about much this week.

Sorry, gang.  This is all I’ve got...

Item # 2 – Amy Zidian got let go this week.

Who the f*ck is Amy Zidian?

Apparently, she appeared on SmackDown over the past couple of weeks as Jimmy Wang Yang’s sidekick chick.  I had no idea, actually.  She’s one of a zillion faceless, void-of-personality “Divas” who WWE throws at our television screen every week in the hopes that ratings go up and fans go insane.

They’ll never learn that the lightning that was Sable or Trish Stratus won’t hit every single time.  I guess that’s the point of throwing them all out there, though...just on the hopes that the next Stacy Keibler is in the bunch.  It’s silly, really.

Wait a second...it’s WWE we’re talking about here.  Never mind.  Let the mindless bimbo brigade continue.

Item # 3 – Hey Charlie Haas...

...Randy Savage called.  He wants his gimmick back (although at this point in Haas' career, would that be so bad?).

Item # 4 – ...and his ass, and his ass...

I don’t know why Mr. McMahon’s ass has arms, but this is one of the biggest ego-strokes I’ve ever seen.  Whomever is writing/drawing/producing these vignettes has some serious ass-kissing issues.  This is absolutely ridiculous.  However, the more I hear that song the more I want it on mp3. 

Item # 5 – LOSER OF THE WEEK.

Each and every week, I pick somebody (not necessarily always from wrestling) who has either acted in a dumb way, said something stupid, or generally was an idiot in some way, shape, or form.  This week wasn’t tough at all.  Once I read the story I laughed out loud and pushed all other thoughts to the back.  It was really quite the obvious decision to make the choice for ZAH’s Loser of the Week to be...

William Shatner!!!

What...you don’t know why??

This is how bad my week’s gone, folks.  Not only have I not watched any wrestling, I was forced by my wife during my baby’s feeding to watch Show Me The Money...which is a game show that rips off aspects of Deal or No Deal and Who Wants to be a Millionaire.  What’s torturous about it all is not only the “Million Dollar Dancers” but William Shatner himself.

Now, I’ve always been a big Star Trek fan...but I’ve got no qualms saying I’m a Pickard fan over Kirk, bar none.  The best thing Shatner ever did after Trek was one skit as a guest on SNL.  Good lord...on this show he is just cringe-inducing.  The first contestant showed up in roller-skates.  The second contestant played air-guitar.  Yeah...seriously.  All the while Shatner is dancing around making me long for a rap by Ron Killings just to pass the time.

Therefore, for simply being part of a horrific unoriginal game show that I was stuck watching last night, congrats to William Shatner on being my Loser of the Week!

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Sigh ~~    That’s all I got folks.  Sorry.  Blame Baby ZAH. Thank goodness I've actually got readers who like to do some writing of their own...

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Pillar to Post 

Each and every week I’ll take three statements that you, the WorldWrestlingInsanity.com readers, have submitted on the hot topics du jour and then get two or three volunteers to give their thoughts and insight.  Ladies and gentlemen, this week (and I encourage every reader to throw me an e-mail and volunteer), I was able to find three great World Wrestling Insanity readers in Curse_7781, Peter Wilura, and bmartin121490!

1. Agree or Disagree
The Voodoo Kin Mafia gimmick is working to perfection thus far.

bmartin121490: Agree       

Of course, giving your competitor free advertising and making yourself look like a totally second rate show is a good idea and I must say its working beyond perfection. its making WWE house shows exciting again. Hell Vince made more money not rehiring them then he ever could have with them back in DX. In all honesty I am not the world’s biggest TNA fan but I do wish that they could get bigger so as to pose some type of competition to WWE I truly believe that would elevate both companies. This is not the way to do it.

Curse_7781: Disagree.

Could TNA explain to me what exactly are they supposed to do since Vince never says yes to their challenge? I mean, they spent a lot of time promoting this angle (I doubt this counts as a feud) but none at just letting the company do what it does best. For all I know that, they could rush to the ring on Raw, and Jim Ross & Jerry Lawler could totally blow them off as "a bunch of asses" thus never acknowledging TNA in general. TNA has alot going for them via the videogames and Spike TV still impressed by them. Hopefully they will come to their senses and drop this angle as the internet fans don't seem to like them very much and I doubt the majority of wrestling crowds even cares about the Voodoo Kin Mafia members in general.

Peter Wilura: Agree.

I think that TNA taking this VKM angle is awesome and I think those who are marks for the WWE and DX who are talking smack about this have to remember that this is why we fell in love with the old DX in the first place (especially doing the same thing to WCW). DX was about taking shots, doing parodies and cutting to the chase on some “taboo” wrestling politics. Now the DX is boring and I’m glad TNA and the old DX posse is calling the WWE on it.  We know that the WWE won’t call TNA or the VKM on their challenges but I think it’s only a matter of time before the WWE mentions TNA or the VKM (or even have DX address it somehow).  That anticipation of a potential weekly smack-talk or diss is another reason the Monday night wars were one of the best periods in wrestling.  Hell, the WWE already ripped off Samoa Joe. Speaking of which, has anyone seen the mess-up on one of G4 TV’s shows where Samoa Joe is interviewed and the caption actually says “WWE Wrestler” or superstar?

2. Agree or Disagree
Big Show’s legacy will be a disappointing one of “coulda-been.”

bmartin121490: Disagree

Big show went full circle in his career. This as apposed to many careers is a good thing seeing as big show debuted on top. He came into the business feuding with Hogan. Then midway through his career we experienced him going through silly story lines and gimmicks (i.e. Showkishi amongst others). When he left the WWE he came out looking like an tough monster and the only man to ever hold the ECW WCW and WWE titles. That and he was a fairly good worker unlike many of the big men you see today. Paul White will be missed by me at the very least and i for one hope to see him as a hall of fame inductee in the future.

Curse_7781: Agree.

Big Show is a guy that no doubt had a lot of potential despite winning the WWE title, the crowd never got into him and once they did it was only to put heat on him when he became ECW champion because it ruined the legacy of ECW. Big Show would probably be known for being paid a lot of money (ala Mark Henry), and the crowds could care less about how he's got "it" in the WWE. It just goes to show that big guys aren't a draw anymore, and that's a shame because he had great talent as a wrestler until the idiots gave him the impression that he had to be a "giant" to get over.

Peter Wilura: I have to agree with this one.

In WCW, when The Giant appeared, he seemed unstoppable (just like the NWO at the time). The WWE went for that same angle when he appeared on WWE TV for the first time.  As long as I can remember, I’ve never really been hyped about anything with the Big Show.  They would make him seem unstoppable but then the babyface at the time would crush him. Hell, Big Show lost to some of the worst wrestlers/”superstars” out there. You always knew when The Big Show was going to lose a match, too, so there was no suspense.  Any time the WWE started to get on a role with this guy, whether it would be funny babyface or monster heel, they’d mess it up and then Show would be put on the backburner once again. After Raw, Smackdown, and ECW (where at least they let him seem like a monster again for a bit), the Big Show is taking time off. Hopefully when he returns, the WWE will let him go out as a monster, but with all the rumors of Hogan/Show at the next WrestleMania, it’ll be another J.O.B. for the Big man.

3. Agree or Disagree
The Hardy Boyz should not reunite permanently on RAW.

bmartin121490: Disagree.

I love tag team wrestling. It's why I used to watch wrestling. To be honest I’m not sure I watch wrestling these days besides a few streaks of hope I still have for the business (see. C.M. Punk, Samoa Joe and my boy Shelton Benjamin). I digress, I want to see a credible tag team division again not one based on making the next singles stars. I miss teams like the Dudley’s and LOD. Yes occasionally it’s ok to break up a tag team and have them move on but it shouldn’t be something that happens all the time. We need serious tag teams I was extremely excited to see TWGTT get back together. My thoughts being THANK GOD a tag team that isn’t linked to a comedy act. I'm sick of the Tag division being all about laughs with teams like Cryme Tyme and the Highlanders. Then Haas and Benjamin cut their first promo together... and it ends with Haas saying DY-NO-MYTE and fo shizzle?! It made me want to scream i literally hit myself in the head for getting my hopes up. Thank god they redeemed themselves in the ring but nonetheless. Ok, done ranting about that. The Hardyz can get back together if Jeff drops the IC belt and its a solid tag team for an extended amount of time and not just a month or two thing. Personally I'd love to see the Hardyz vs. MNM vs. TWGTT run a program together for the tag titles. But hey I’m just a dreamer in a Vince McMahon world stuff like this will never happen and the tag team division will always just be looking for a cheap laugh.

Curse_7781: Disagree.

Excuse me but isn't the tag-team situation a mess on the WWE? Show me some real good tag-team people other than recently added Shenton and Charlie Haas. Half of their tag-team division still stinks and they need all the help they can get. Plus its Matt and Jeff Hardy, it would be bad business if they didn't put those two back together. They didn't work as singles so why not?

Peter Wilura: I have to say a little bit of both on this one.

I like seeing the tag action coming back a little on Raw. We got to see MNM. We have The Highlanders and (the actually amusing) Cryme Time (sp). We got to see The World’s Greatest Tag Team do their thing again on Raw. We could even have two out of the four remaining Spirit Squad members form a decent tag team under a different banner. So why can’t the Hardys reunite and be active in the division? Hell, DX and Orton/Edge are basically a tag team that compete in singles matches but act like tag teams on most Raw episodes.  The pluses are that the Hardys take their place as one of the best teams ever in the WWE and that Matt Hardy gets back in the spotlight. The minuses are that Jeff Hardy will lose his IC belt and be placed back into the tag team division instead of being a breakout singles superstar (remember how psyched people were during and after his match against HHH for the championship)? Either way, Jeff will be taken care of while Matt’s future (in the horrible Smackdown brand) is in question. This would be great for tag team fans and Matt’s career while Jeff may have more to lose.

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Great job everybody, thanks!!  I’m looking forward to seeing who gets to join me as a guest columnist next week. 

No problem.  Either e-mail me at Zah@worldwrestlinginsanity.com or hit me up at ZAH Nation, found in the Insanity Message Board and let me know that you’d like to participate.  Also, don’t forget to stop by my MySpace page and add me.

So until next week…

L8R