Hey guys. I’m back and I must apologize for the delay. I was having some technical difficulties. Anyways, Jobber Night Heat rears its ugly head again. Yup the recaps are done and we are back to our regularly scheduled programming. But there is a bright side ladies and gentlemen, the best things about Heat have finally moved to Raw. That’s right, the WWE creative team finally woke up and smelled the coffee by putting Shelton and Haas back together. It was also good finally hear Charile Hass’ voice and I must say the promo they pulled on Raw was actually quite entertaining. But this isn’t Raw. It’s Heat. And we’re not gonna see the world’s greatest tag team or the world’s greatest wrestling but we will get to see something very Heaterrific.

If you remember these two exchanged air time on the 12/4 Edition of Raw. Val was in the ring with the kiss cam and two girls when Eugene came out and wanted some sugar for himself. When he was denied, he proceeded to beat down Val set the stage for this epic encounter.

Val comes out and does his usual towel thing as the camera pans over some unattractive females in the audience. Then Eugene comes out (who I have gained some respect for cause he plays his character really well). He starts yelling “I’m special” at the audience and actually sticks his tongue out at some little kids. The match begins with Eugene scurrying out the ring and screaming “I’m not Ready” only to go back in the ring and run out again. Match finally begins with Venis in total control as he nails a couple of elbows and scoop slams. The only reason he’s got the upper hand is cause Eugene hasn’t gone psycho yet. He’s still the scared little boy that doesn’t know what to do. But then it happens, he goes beserk. Outside the ring he rams Val’s back into the ring apron (it almost looked like a shoot) and lets out some primal screams. Then he drags Val to the ropes and viciously chokes him with it. He applies an abdominal stretch with some help from the ropes. The ref catches him but Eugene pleads his case by once again screaming “I’m special”. This is enough of a distraction for SoCal Val, who catches a Russian Leg Sweep. He gains the upper hand with some punches and then stiff knife edge chops. Eugene catches Valley in a sleeper hold but Val reverses it into a swing-out slam as Todd Grisham called it. Ref counts 2 but damnit that was a three. The audience agrees and boos the hell out the ref. Then the Big Valbowski hits a move that I personally haven’t seen in a long time, he runs with Eugene to one side of the ring (not really an Irish whip cause he never lets go) and knees him in the midsection. But when he goes for it on the other side Gene clocks him in the face and then rolls him up with a surprise cover. Mind you he used the ropes for the win.

It was a well played out match. Eugene started off as the scared little “special person” victim to society’s mockery, but as the match progressed he evolved into a looney bin nutcase willing to do anything to win. I liked it. Kinda like the Incredible Hulk. As Bruce Banner he is a harmless being, but as The Hulk he is a mean, green, ass kicking machine.

Armageddon Promo. It’s gonna suck. Sorry Smackdown fans but that’s what I personally believe. So many gimmick matches. But I guess Kennedy and Taker and Kane and MVP have to have every match there is in the WWE. Next up, tag team bra and panties.

What’s the story with Lance Cade? One week he’s pissed off like somebody slapped his mama and the next he’s smilin’ and profilin’. I guess its cause he got new clothes. Clean white shirt and pants and a nice cowboy hat. Trevor on the other hand is still one ugly son of a gun. Tie-up between Cade and Sampson to start the match off after which Lance takes the jobber down with a snapmare. He is drinking some of the Randy Orton Kool-Aid cause he loves what he just did and climbs the top rope imitating the Legend Killer. Then a weird moment takes place on Heat as someone in the audience catches Murdoch and Cade’s eyes. The Rednecks begin screaming at them and Murdoch gets so pissed that he gets off the apron and actually climbs over the barricade to go beat them up. Fortunately, Cade holds him back. I’m not really sure if it was a work or a shoot.

They get back to the match and Cade whips Static Shock into the apron but eats some boot when he comes in himself for a clothesline. But Static pays for it when Cade slaps the holy high hell outta the poor kid and starts beating his ass up. I mean boots and elbows and punches and just plain out pummeling the jobber. Tag to Mr. Sideburns and they hit Static with that damn great double team (inverted atomic drop by Cade and a huge running boot by Murdoch). I wish they’d come up with a name for the damn thing so I don’t have to describe it every week. Murdoch lays in the punishment as Jason Static gets destroyed on the world wide web. Murdoch is in a fighting mood and since Static isn’t proving to be much of a challenge, the tobacco spitter tosses him to the jobber corner so he can make the tag. Sampson comes in with some right hands but he too gets taken down with a Murdoch left. Then Trevor Irish whips Freddy and almost takes his head off with an elbow. The audience expresses their disbelief with a few OHHHs. Tag to the Jeff Jarrett wannabe who starts laying in some knees and elbows in the corner. Tag back to Murdoch who is whipped by Cade into Sampson nailing a hard clothesline in the process. Then they signal for the High-Low and nail it quite beautifully. 1-2-3 it’s over.

Winners: Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch

Amazing. These guys kicked their ass from post to pillar. They showed no remorse and held nothing back and this was nothing short of a mugging in the street. Elbows, fists, boots and just about anything else they could have hit them with, The Redneck Wrecking Crew did. Awesome ass kicking and all I can say to the jobbers is that’s gonna hurt in the morning.

WWE magazine promo. TNA releases a DVD for its 50 Greatest Moments, WWE just puts ‘em in a magazine.

I really respect Vince McMahon for doing this every year. I know he does it for good publicity but c’mon it’s gotta be more than that. But I’ve always wondered, are all the soldiers wrestling fans or are they just sitting in the audience wondering who the hell is that? Nonetheless, big props to Vinny Mac for doing something right once in a while and don’t forget to see the Tribute to the Troops show on Christmas Night.

Coach hits a good point here. He says that Super Crazy looks a bit like Nacho Libre and I guess he’s right, cause I can see the resemblance. Anyways, the match starts off with Super working on Conway’s arm. He gets on an arm lock which Conway breaks out of by getting to the ropes. Then a tie-up between the men and Crazy takes Conway down with a headlock. Rob counters by locking his head between his legs which Crazy gets out of with a nip up. The same thing happens again and I realize that this match sucks. I’m bored. Match finally gets a bit exciting when Crazy nails a tilt-a-whirl head scissors and two dropkicks that send Conway flying out the ring. The crowd loved it and Crazy gives them something else to cheer about when he nails a springboard moonsault on the Conster outside the ring. Unbelievable stuff from the Luchador so I take back what I said about this match being bad.

Crazy tosses Conway into the ring but Robby Boy shows that he is also a force to be reckoned with. When the former Mexicool goes on the top rope, Conway runs up, grabs his head and hotspots it on the rope. Good stuff right here folks. The crowd even applauds. The wrestlers use this time for a breather cause Crazy stays out the ring for a good while. Then he climbs onto the apron only to be knocked off again. Conway suplexes El Senor Loco into the ring and gets a two count. Rob then locks in a triangle choke but Crazy is able to break out. But Conway gets back in control with a lot of elbows and about 3 covers after that. Mr. Just Look at Me locks in a modified version of the backbreaker but Crazy fights out with lots punches. Conway then whips him into the corner but eats a boot for his troubles and then a spinning heel kick. He sends Conway into the opposite corner and nails him with a monkey flip ala RVD. Then he nails a stiff Inzaguri and a standing moonsault for the win.

What the hell? Where is the Super Crazy moonsault? C’mon Vince I know you banned some moves but the moonsault wasn’t that risky. It kills all the momentum if he wins with a standing moonsault and makes his opponent look like a little sissy.

All in all, it was your average Heat. Nothing too special except for the Redneck Wrecking Crew kickin’ some jobber ass. Everything else was just okay.

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