All Good With Aaron Wood: WWE Year In Review - February 2006
By Aaron Wood
(JG Note: Our resident Smackdown recapper from the U.K., Aaron Wood, will be taking a look back at the past year in WWE. He'll be presenting his retrospective month-by-month over the next few weeks. Be sure to check back in the next day or so for his look at March. You can check out January by clicking here.)
THE WWE IN 2006: FEBRUARY
Rey Mysterio (w/Eddie Guerrero's spirit in his corner) vs. Randy Orton (w/ Pooped-in ladies gym bag in his corner...possibly...)
With only three weeks until that annual no-name of a PPV called No Way out (I suppose it does have a name then, scratch that last part), Smackdown needed matches and quick-smart, so they went to the grand old well that is "Rumble winner puts shot on the line", however, depending on your point of view, it could be said, this time around, it was rather disrespectful...
You see, this year's Rumble winner was Rey Mysterio, who in the build to the match, constantly dedicated his performance to his late friend, Eddie Guerrero, and the little guy duly won, eliminating Randy Orton for that win, and it was Orton who made the obligatory interruption to Rey's victory speech on the Smackdown after the PPV, to say that while Eddie was watching Mysterio, he was looking up from hell, rather than down from heaven. Yeah, they went there. And then, after pinning Rey, Orton said that Eddie had more chance for coming back than Rey did of beating him. Yeah, they went there too. This was enough for Rey to put his title shot on the line at No Way Out.
Orton even took it to another level the following week, when after telling Rey he said what he to get in his head, he then came out to the ring in a low-rider! He went to try and read an excerpt from Eddie's book. However, this made Rey snap, and in the fight that ensued, Rey dropkicked Orton’s head onto one of the ring posts.
Rey's aggression carried on to the show week, when he ripped Sylvan Grenier apart, although Orton would get the last word when he told Rey he had no chance of winning.
Angle's last great feud?
After beating Mark Henry at the Rumble, Undertaker surprised Kurt Angle by destroying the ring, literally. This wanton supernatural vandalism meant a challenge to the Olympic Hero. After Angle told the Deadman to bring it on, Taker found himself on the wrong side of a 3 on 1 attack by MNM and Mark Henry, when who should come to his rescue? Angle, himself!
The following week saw Undertaker & Angle take on MNM and Henry, where the title contenders decided to engage a little show of one-upsmanship. Angle & Taker won the match, heading into No Way Out, but Undertaker went in with momentum, as he impressed Angle with not only hitting a chokeslam on Mark Henry, but also hitting him with a tombstone as well...
Who needs a 7 match series when you have this?
Despite losing a Best of Seven series to a mixture of Booker T and Randy Orton, you'd have thought he'd move on to bigger and better things, but alas no. He stayed feuding with Booker. The show after the Rumble saw Teddy Long grant Benoit a title match, but Booker claimed he still couldn't wrestle, so Finlay, who had yet to actually win a match, was drafted in as a replacement. Benoit had the match won, but Sharmell caused a DQ to keep the title on her husband, who was on commentary.
The following week, there was a Number One Contender match, which Benoit won. Long then told Booker that he would make the defence at No Way Out, and this time, Booker would have to do his own dirty work, otherwise, he'd forfeit the title.
Booker was still complaining as the PPV honed into view however, and watched while Benoit and Bobby Lashley took on JBL & Finlay. That said, the match did wonders for Booker's injury, as towards the end of the bout, Booker got up from his chair, whacked Benoit with a crutch and danced off up the aisle. A MIRACLE!!! A MIRACLE I TELLS YA!!!
Who Better Than Kanyon Helms?
Having defected from RAW and won the Cruiserweight Title at the Royal Rumble, Gregory Helms was on top of the world. In fact, he believed that he wasn't only better than the Cruiserweight Division, but that he WAS the Cruiserweight Division. First up was Nunzio, who Helms defeated easily. Then it was Scotty Taylor. However, after that match, the entire division, babyface and heel alike ran in and attacked the cocky outsider, before Teddy Long made the call to have the whole division, once again, in a single match, the first man to get the pinfall winning the title.
After being on the "staring at the lights" end of the US Title contender match, Matt Hardy was feeling down. His day would perk up though, when he was approached by Melina, who told him that if he scratched MNM's back, they'd scratch his. After defeating Simon Dean, he was once again approached by Melina. However, Hardy had time to think, and turned down her request, but did take MNM up on one of their other offers, as they had made a non-title open challenge to any tag team. Hardy told them he'd have a partner, and he'd see them at No Way Out.
Pirates Of The WWE - The Curse Of The Successful Film Franchise
And as one tag team looked to add to their numbers, another tag team sadly split up. William Regal and Paul Burchill decided they would go their separate ways, since they found it touch getting along, what with Regal coming from royalty and Burchill be descended from pirates and all...
The following week, Burchill would swing into a segment with Teddy Long, Palmer Canon, Ken Kennedy, Kristal and a couple of the members of the Junior Division, saying hello to one and all. However, he was now dressed like some sort of famous pirate character based on the guitarist from the Rolling Stones, from a particular film...
One Way In...No Way Out
The final PPV before Wrestlemania saw:
Gregory Helms retained the Cruiserweight Title, when he pinned Psicosis.
JBL scored the first pin on Lashley, thanks to Finlay.
MNM were defeated in their open challenge by Matt Hardy and his partner...Tatanka...geez...
Chris Benoit finally won the US Title by defeating Booker T.
Randy Orton won the Wrestlemania 22 Title shot after pinning Rey Rey.
Kurt Angle, in a highly under-rated match, retained the World Title after beating Undertaker.
Cena chooses Edge's next feud...
With his title reign having lasted a mere 21 days, a reign ended the previous night by John Cena, Edge wanted more, and so he was damn sure quick to invoke his rematch clause. However, in the match, Cena had Edge up for the FU, when Lita took the title and hit Edge in the head with it. While this granted Edge the win, it didn't give him the title.
The following week, Maria was in the ring to interview him, when the Rated-R Superstar, Edge, and the Rated-XXX gal, Lita, got on poor Ms. Kanellis case, drawing out John Cena for the save. This drew out Vince McMahon who ordered a mixed tag match later won, with the winner getting to choose the referee for a final Edge/Cena encounter the following week. This would be a match Cena won, although it was Maria who picked up the pin over Lita, and Cena chose...Mick Foley!
Foley called the match down the middle, although Edge would fins contention in a slow count Foley made, although he was recovering from a spear at the time, so what goes around comes around, really... Cena won the match, with an impressive move, catching Edge, going for a body press, and hoisting him up for the FU in one movement. After the match, Edge and Lita beat on Mick Foley.
Edge would then challenge Foley to a wrestling match at Wrestlemania. However, when Foley responded, he declined Edge's challenge, decided to make one of his own. But not for a WRESTLING match, instead preferring a HARDCORE match!
The King Of
After Edge lost his rematch, a new official challenger was needed for the big show. Well, not The Big Show, he was one of the potential challengers himself, but the big show of Wrestlemania.
An eight man tournament was created that saw Kane, Chris Masters, Carlito, RVD, HHH, Ric Flair, Big Show and Shawn Michaels compete for the title shot.
The first Semi-Final saw RVD defeat Chris Masters, where as the other Semi saw HHH take on Big Show. However, they would end up wrestling to a Double Count Out! While many fans wondered and possibly hoped that meant RVD would take on Cena (you'd have to wait for that...), Big Vince decided that rather than punish both men for losing, he'd reward them for their aggressiveness, by making the final match a Triple Threat bout.
The final match would be a back and forth affair. After hitting a Frog Splash, RVD looked to have the match won, but Big Show kicked out of it, leaving RVD prime for a Pedigree, giving HHH the win and the match with Cena.
However, Vince would seek to throw something of a thorn in both men's sides as he told them, and the world, that at the resurrected Saturday Night's Main Event, it would be the RAW Wrestlemania Main Event combatants against the Smackdown Wrestlemania Main Event combatants.
The Year Of The Ass, and I don't mean it in the "Chinese Year Of" sense... And "Ass" doesn't mean "donkey"...
After having his son Shane eliminate Shawn Michaels for the Royal Rumble match, Vince was in great form. However, HBK was in a fighting mood, and promptly challenged his boss. However, an angry Vince said he wouldn't only get in the ring under his own terms.
But that didn't mean a beating the following week. Indeed, Vince decided to mess some more with HBK. Having made it through to the Semi-finals of the Wrestlemania Title Shot tournament, Michaels was ready to take on Big Show. However, Vince relieved Shawn from his combative duties (to be replaced by Shelton Benjamin), and that on the RAW that was moved because of the Westminster Dog Show (well, either that or tennis...I'm British, remember!) it would be Shawn Michaels retirement party!
However, the party itself amounted to a "cheer" from the Spirit Squad, and something a kin to a contract signing. Not a single pudding pop was in sight... However, Shawn signed nothing, instead wondering why Vince was doing all of it to him. Vince rationaled that it was because he wanted some of Shawn's "inner peace". HBK took pity and then ripped up the papers. Well maybe "pity" is the wrong word, prompting Vince to tell Shawn he was going to enter his personal hell.
Week 1 of hell saw Michaels in a 5 on 1 match against the whole Spirit Squad. The Squad ended up DQ'ed, but continued to attack until Marty (Freaking) Jannetty made his 35743468th comeback, making the save. Vince decided that he would offer Marty a contract...if he kissed his ass.
However, it wouldn't be the man who went through the Barbershop window who puckered up the following week. It was be the man who sent him through it, Michaels himself. Marty came close, but couldn't, so Vince decided there would be a Masterlock Challenge instead. But when Marty passed out, Vince whipped out his tailgate again, and Marty was inched towards Vince. Shawn made the save there, but was bashed with a chair by Shane McMahon, who then proceeded to press HBK's lips onto Vince's ass!
Momma's dying wish…
The night of February 6th was a bad one for Shelton Benjamin. Not only was he beaten by Big Show in the aforementioned Semi final match, but Big Show also yelled at Shelton's momma, who had tried to interfere, causing her to collapse.
The following week, she revealed to Vince that she had a heart condition and wasn't long for the world, so he gave Shelton an IC Title shot, provided he beat Eugene which he did. Shelton would then go on to win the IC belt from Ric Flair. Bringing his mother to ringside, Shelton found the power from within to...pick up the air tank his mother was using and hit Flair with it for the win!
Mickie gets even nuttier...
Mickie James was indeed getting nuttier by the week. And her aggression was firmly pointed at Ashley. Convinced that Trish helped her beat Ashley, Mickie threw a party for her idol the following night, which Ashley gatecrashed, telling Mickie that Trish, like everyone else, thought that Mickie was a psycho. Mickie was hurt by this and left, although Trish didn't get a chance to say otherwise, only to return and take Ashley down.
Ashley would be able to get revenge though, as she beat Mickie in the resulting match, with Trish as referee again. However, when looking for her muse later on in the evening, Mickie was told Trish had left to go on a date. And it couldn't have been a bad night, as "Jack" showed up the following week, looking to surprise Trish. However, he would be the one surprised as he found Mickie, dressed up as Trish! She began to seduce him, but then started ripping her top and screaming, and when security came in, it looked for all the world like Jack was attacking Mickie! Even Trish was taken in. Silly woman...
Next Month: People pose for magazine covers, beer was drunk, someone got booted form their own (stolen) idea and Animal finally decided to be a singles wrestler, and become a gay biker at the same time…
OR, you can find me along with the rest of the dribbling masses on MY OWN MYSPACE PAGE!
Well, I’ll be back soon enough, but for now, I believe I’ve fulfilled my contractual obligations. For reading this, And continuing to support World Wrestling Insanity, you’re cooler than the other side of the pillow…
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