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Aaron Wood's Smackdown: The Sons of Paul Bearer vs. King Booker and Finlay
By Aaron Wood
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LAST WEEK ON SMACKDOWN: Cena gave away his nuts, The Miz ate brains as if it would give him some, Undertaker hitched a ride and we said goodbye to Joey Mercury's perfect face...
THE SHOW That's what you get when you want a rematch... Before the credits roll, we go straight to Teddy Long's office where King Booker and Finlay are bitching about losing to Batista and Cena at the great Armageddon PPV, wanting a rematch on this week's show. Long isn't going to give them one. However, when Booker remarks that they want the best competition there is to offer, T Lo is more than willing to give them the men who separately set fire to someone and gave someone their last ride at the great Armageddon PPV, Undertaker and Kane. That can't work out well for the heels, me thinks... Batista def. Santa Claus in a "Is Santa from Quebec now? The WWE really does take things too far sometimes..." match It's not all match, as Batista first makes his way to the ring to have a chat. He wishes the crowd and audience a happy holidays, before mentioning how good he's feeling right now. And then, just because he's got all those chimneys to climb down on Christmas Eve, Santa Claus decided to get the jump on the wrestling audience portion of the planet and hand out some free merchandise to the crowd, as JBL ruminates on there Santa being at the "Tribute To The Troops" show (i.e. him...probably) and Michael Cole, although JBL wants to fight him for the Piper DVD. Batista watched on as Santa got in the ring and gave him a box of candy canes, the like of which you only see at Christmas. Like any good babyface however, Batista decided to pass them onto the audience too, at which point, Santa pulled out a lead pipe, and smacked Batista upside the Santa gets the best of the early going, what with Batista recovering from the aforementioned piping, targeting the injured arm. But very quickly Deacon Dave got the best of old St. Nick with some clotheslines and a spear. It was at this point we found out who it really was. Now, if you were thinking it was Ball Mahoney reprising his gimmick of Xanta Klaus, sadly, you were mistaken. If you were hoping that, since he's now taking a beating, that it was Big Dick Johnson reprising his role from the great Armageddon PPV and Santa, unfortunately for you, it wasn't him either. It was, in actual fact, Sylvan Grenier, taking a page from Rene's playbook of interrupting the dominant champion. Sylvan was also sporting a nice sideline in blusher and light blue eyeliner... Suffice to say, the Quebecois ambassador-cum-part time Santa wasn't long for this match after that, as a Batista Bomb scored the champion the winning pin. Thoughts - 4/10 - It pretty much turned into a squash, but it was quite fun. And I wonder if the choice of making Sylvan attack is gonna lead somewhere, because it seemed too random to be random, if you get what I mean... Chris Benoit def. Chavo Guerrero by DQ in a "Will one of these two just get a pair and beat Vicki up properly?" match Benoit started out hot (as did the crowd, it should be noted), but Chavo took control quickly after they teased a Crossface. Chavo stayed on top, but they took a tumble to the outside when Benoit went for a German. We come back from the break with Chavo in control in the ring with a body scissors. However, every time Benoit tried to retake the advantage, Chavo managed to counter out of it, including the Armageddon-finishing Sharpshooter. However, slowly, Benoit started making a comeback with a flapjack before hitting the Germans. Benoit went up for the headbutt, even though he chose the corner very much furthest from Chavito. They went up top, but Benoit was knocked down, but the Frog Splash attempt only got a pair of knees. Benoit locked in the Crossface, drawing in Vicki with the US Title belt. She hit Benoit in the head with it, drawing the DQ. Benoit stared her down but left. When Chavo got up, he complained that he wouldn't be able to win the title if she kept getting him DQ'ed. He started poking her in the chest, with the last, particularly hard, poke knocking her down. This brought back Benoit, but as the Rabid one spoke to Vicki, Chavo attacked from behind, hitting Benoit again with the Title belt. But it wasn't a plan all along, as Chavo left on his own. Thoughts - 7/10 - Once again, this was pretty good stuff, although the main point to be taken from here was the post match stuff, which was quite interesting. Are we gonna have something cut in the UK... For the first time ever, we get a bit called "From the Vault", with the same Vault as the HBK DVD of the similar name, which is the end of a King Booker vs. Lashley match from June earlier in the year. And when I say "the end" of the match, I really mean a good , I mean the last TEN MINUTES!!! I can only apologise, but sometimes somewhere between Sky TV in the UK and the WWE decide that the viewers in the UK shouldn't see something. 99% of the time it's because of gratuitous plugs that are made. Knowing what is in this show, I can't imagine what it will be. It should be interesting to see, but utterly galling as to why it was cut... I'm sure Vince has something stashed away that'll pile on some weight, Gregory... Gregory Helms is in the ring, and tells us that he has a Christmas wish. Some competition. However, rather than urging Johnny Ace to hire some more cruiserweights, Helms said that he would have to get bigger over the holidays and become a heavyweight. How ironic, a cruiserweight gets promo time on TV, and he says he wants to be a heavyweight! However, before he gets too much further with that thought, he's reminded of what he'd probably end up with against if he did...The Boogeyman... Helms attacks when the Boogster hits the ring, but Boogeyman no sells it and hits some offence, which forces Helms to bail. Which is a shame because he didn't see what happened next, which saw Tony Chimel, for no apparent reason whatsoever, other than he was bored and wanted to say something other than a wrestler's height, weight and hometown, decided to announce "He's the Boogeyman, and he's comin' to get ya!". Possibly angered at this breach of copyright, Boogeyman decided that it should be Chimel that takes a "worming". He gets trapped on the announce desk, and gets some worms shoved in his face, sending Chimel sprinting up the aisle. NOT IN THE FACE!!! So far so good on seeing the stuff that should be in this show, then. Joey Mercury comes out to the ring. Slowly. Cole and JBL review Mercury's injury, as I wonder who Mercury looks more like the singer from Korn or the singer from Saliva. Mercury gets a mic and tells of his injury, before sending it up to the TitanTron for some lovely replays of the injury. We see a close up of the injury, albeit in black and white, and when we come back, Mercury even gets a respectful round of applause. He says he holds 2 people responsible. Matt and Jeff Hardy. I was kinda hoping for Rosie O’Donnell and Martha Stewart, but you can’t win them all… Mercury says he's lost half the vision in his left eye, some broken facial bones and a whole number of stitches, losing his "movie star good looks". This draws out a regretful looking Matt Hardy, who comes to the ring, as the announcers debate who was responsible. Matt says no-one meant for it to happen, and that it wasn't intentional, and that it was a dangerous match, and that it was the price you can pay for being in such a match. Hardy goes to leave, but Mercury calls him back, having not bought a word. Mercury says if it was in competition Matt should fight him. Matt doesn't want to but Mercury keeps goading him, but when Hardy point blank refuses, Mercury wonders if Matt will fight Johnny Nitro, who, as if by magic, comes out! Certainly an interesting angle they've got going here, and chances are it could be the making of Mercury. His promo was very competent and interesting. To be honest, it wouldn't surprise me if Vince suddenly decided that bringing the two teams involved back full time. My one gripe with this bit was that while they did a really good jobs of putting over that "it was because we were fighting for the tag titles", and elevating them, not once did they mention anyone else in the match. You'd think that the Hardyz and MNM were the only two teams in the match, especially after a line by Matt. Johnny Nitro def. Matt Hardy in a "Well, at least they gave Jeff a show off for once..." match The match starts out pretty even, hitting various spot. After countering a Side Effect with a neckbreaker, Nitro bailed to the outside, where he reached under the ring and got himself a ladder. JBL proclaimed "payback is a bitch", as we went to break. We come back with both men up top, but no sign of the ladder. We get a recap where seconds after getting the ladder out, Hardy hit a baseball slide into the ladder, knocking Nitro down, with officials taking the ladder way afterwards. Nitro took control when he hit an enziguri with Hardy on the top turnbuckle. However, after missing a springboard enziguri, Hardy began a comeback with a clothesline and knees to the face. A Side Effect and a Leg Drop off the top both get a two count. However, the Twist Of Fate was countered, Nitro putting his feet on the ropes to steal the win. Thoughts - 6/10 - Perfectly decent fare here, as you would expect. It's more about what will happen going forward however, not that I'm against that. Just to tease us with some potential 2007 greatness... JBL is in the ring, with a mic in hand. He says that he was appalled at Armageddon, when he witnessed the Inferno match, saying there is a reason why there hadn't been an Inferno match in almost 8 years. He said that it looks good on paper, but in reality, it was someone getting burned. JBL placed the blame squarely on Teddy Long. After seeing some stills of MVP's ass on fire, JBL calls out his boss to explain himself and apologise. However, JBL gets Sweet F A. JBL threatens the use of lawyers. JBL accepts Long isn't coming, and thus turns on the crowd, saying that when they cheer when they need something extremely violent, despite the workers being on the road 200 days a year. He said Rome fell because of the sick people in the stand. JBL says that the people have embarrassed the US and that they make him sick. God damn, was that interesting! I’m rather pumped to see where this goes. To be frank, is it too late to change any "promo of the year" votes? Ashley & Layla def. Kristal & Jillian Hall in a "When did Jillian turn heel?" match Well, it seems the choreography lessons have kicked in with Layla at least. Ashley & Kristal start out, with Ashley taking Kristal to school. She even works out an interesting double team elbow drop with Layla. Jillian gets tagged in, and starts to work over Layla in a fairly heelish way. Layla makes the hot tag to Ashley who manages to hit a perfectly perfunctory hurricanrana! However, the heels look to take the win, when Jillian tries to use the ropes. However, the faces take back the advantage when Ashley goes up top and hits a top rope elbow drop. Cole even gives it a name (which I missed)! Thoughts - 4.5/10 - They worked really hard out there, and Ashley especially impressed me here, busting out a few good moves. When you read "Ashley & Layla vs. Jillian & Kristal, you may not think much of it, but they did damn well here. The angle they should have taken with MVP? Vladimir Kozlov obviously decided to take in the WWE's show, after having sat through the good three hour RAW. He must have heard about the great Armageddon PPV. Anyway, it's Michael Cole who does the honours with this one, although it's pretty much the same deal here. Kozlov says it's great to be there and then spouts out something in Russian, including confirming he's signed, to an extent. Difference being that this time, he isn't called "Victor" at the end of it. It's interesting to me, because as I said in the title, this is something like the way MVP should have been brought in. For someone who was supposed to be a hot free agent and for someone whose agent was difficult to negotiate with, MVP was only ever seen on Smackdown. And now, we have Kozlov who has now appeared on both shows. I mean, when I saw him on Monday, I was surprised that he was going to be going on RAW, because I thought he'd make a better fit on Smackdown, or even ECW, maybe teaming up with Terkay, given their compatible gimmicks. But now that he's been on Smackdown, I'm really interested to see where he goes. Undertaker & Kane def. King Booker & Finlay in a "Did you expect different?" match Well, as best I can tell, we made it through unscathed! So why in the name of all that is holy did we get 10 full minutes of a Smackdown match in June??? Taker and Booker start off this one. Undertaker hits the Old School early, drawing in Finlay, prompting Taker to go for it on the Irishman, but Booker runs into the ropes, crotching the Deadman. Booker hits a superplex for 2. Kane gets tagged in and gets to work with both heels, dominating both of them. A near 3 count sees a four way brawl. Taker and Kane call for stereo chokeslams, but the heels see it coming and roll out of the ring. We come back from the break with the faces still dominating, as first Booker, and then Finlay take turns at being beaten up by Taker and Kane. The heels only garner a real advantage when Kane tried his top rope clothesline, only to land into a Booker jumping side kick. Undertaker was kept down at ringside while they worked on Kane in the ring. Interestingly, Booker hit Taker with a chair. Well, what made it interesting was that not only was Nick Patrick fully awake, but quite possibly looking at them at that point, as he was facing their direction when the shot cut back to the ring action. Finlay later hit Taker in the head with his shillelagh, although they did a better job of hiding it. Undertaker eventually got up and booted down Finlay. He soon got the hot tag too, and worked over the face by himself. Kane soon joined him and they gave the heels those stereo chokeslams, Taker giving Finlay a Tombstone to finish things off once and for all. Thoughts - 6/10 - If the invincibility of Taker and Kane, along with Batista, is going to continue for much longer, then there could be serious problems for the brand, unless they turn Paul Bearer's boys soon, because if you think the RAW scene is bad, then it's probably best you look away right now. Cena might almost always come through, but at least he doesn't dominate everyone all the time. That said, it was a decent match, and a good story to it, with the heels trying to keep Taker down on the outside. OVERALL - 7/10 (+ 1 on last week) - This was a pretty good show this week, and certainly very interesting when it comes to the Vicki angle and what JBL came out with. As I said, the “invincibility” of the top three faces could be a problem soon, but they can just about get away with it for now. Other than that, a pretty entertaining show. That’s all I got for now, but if you have something to say about this week’s Smackdown, you can e-mail me at dedicated e-mail address, or come hunt me down on the WWI Forums! OR, you can find me along with the rest of the dribbling masses on MY OWN MYSPACE PAGE! Well, I’ll be back soon enough, but for now, I believe I’ve fulfilled my contractual obligations. For reading this, And continuing to support World Wrestling Insanity, you’re cooler than the other side of the pillow… Also, have a happy, prosperous and safe Christmas. I’m out.
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| © 2005-2007 All content contained here Copyright 2006 by James Guttman *** World Wrestling Insanity and ClubWWI are not affiliated with any wrestling promotion. |
