LAST WEEK ON SMACKDOWN:  The referees dropped a collective pair, MVP touched down and Daivari learned that if he had a request made of him, he really should do it…

THIS WEEK…

Batista def. Finlay by DQ in a "Kennedy's timing is impeccable..." match

And once again, no recaps of nothing, as he hit the credits right away.  And we hit the ground running as it went straight into Batista's music, as he came out ready to wrestle.  As Finlay came out, JBL in his genius, managed to go from soccer to getting a dig at the FRENCH army in one fell swoop!  They locked up, but Batista powered Finlay down.  Batista took Finlay down to the mat, working on Finlay's arm.  I ain't lying.  Finlay flicked sweat as we saw some Italian goth girls.  Finlay floored Batista with an uppercut, but Batista got a double leg take down, punching away on the Irishman.  Finlay looked as if he was stalling for time, but he suckered Batista, sending Batista out of the ring.  But outside the ring, Batista hit a bog boot to Finlay's face.  Batista was rolled back in the ring where Batista scored 2.  Batista drove his shoulder into Finlay's guts in the corner, before locking in a chinlock.  Finlay got out of it, but Batista placed Finlay on the top rope and shoved him off to the floor as we took a break.

We came back with Batista bashing Finlay's head off of various outside railings when Kennedy sprinted in and the heel started beating on Batista.  Huh.  It's not very often you come back from break and the end of the match is less than a minute after.  Kennedy hit a DDT before Finlay hit the Celtic Cross.  Kennedy talked smack as Finlay's music played.  Hardly the Abyss beatdown from Impact, but they are hardly going for the same thing.

Thoughts - 6/10 - The first part of the match was pretty decent, and a nice change of pace for Batista.  the beating was OK, and it got some nice heat for Finlay & Kennedy.  I wonder if the DDT is going to be added to Kennedy's regular rotation...

Michelle McCool...the new Ashley!  Only about 100 times better in every way...

Jillian Hall was in the ring to gloat over her beating of Ashley last week, as she sent it to footage.  Jillian said that since Ashley couldn't be there, she was going to give the Italians some opera.  Cat strangling ensued, drawing boos form the crowd, as Jillian lyrics tended just to name Italian stuff.  Eventually, Michelle McCool (sigh...) came out, looking HOT HOT HOT!!!

Michelle dissed Jillian in Italian.  Michelle then blocked a slap laying in some punches of her own, before Jillian run away.  PUT THESE TWO IN THE RING!  PLEASE!!!  FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY!!!  They are the 2 hottest women in the WWE and they can wrestle better than they are generally allowed to show.

Chris Benoit & The Hardy Boyz def. MVP, Chavo Guerrero & Gregory Helms in a "That's it Smackdown, beat on the RAW guy!" match

I know Matt is still technically a Smackdown guy, but having the Hardyz float back and forth irritates me slightly.  But hey, why deny Smackdown?  It's not as if the WWE Tag champions appear on RAW!  And what a shame it is for Gregory Helms to be reduced to coming out to Chavo's music...  And naturally, MVP spied the Ferrari as he came out...

Benoit & Chavo started out.  Chavo hit a knee to the gut on Benoit before tagging in MVP.  MVP stomped on Benoit, but countered a whip off the ropes, tagging in an oblivious Helms.  Hardy came in, with an elbow, before coming off the ropes with a standing elbow.  Helms bounced off the ropes, but ran into a clothesline, before Jeff was tagged in.  Jeff arm-dragged his opponent cruiserweights, but missed a Whisper In The Wind, allowing the heels to take advantage.  Chavo distracted the referee, allowing his buddies to beat on Jeff.  MVP came and locked in a nice armbar, albeit not for long, although MVP pulled down Jeff before he could do anything.  Helms came in with punches to the gut, before choking Jeff on the ropes.  Chavo came in and hit a low dropkick, as they continued to isolate Hardy.  Hardy fought out of a hold, but ran into a nice dropkick from Chavo.  After a few tags, Chavo distracted the ref again, allowing him and Helms to stomp away on Jeff.  MVP hit a suplex for 2.  However, MVP went to cheapshot Benoit, but it was blocked, which allowed Benoit to get tagged in.

Benoit came in with chops for everyone.  MVP escaped to tag in Benoit, who hit the Triple Germans on Gregory.  Chavo put Benoit down, but Matt hit the Side Effect on him before hitting the Twist of Fate on Helms.  Benoit went up top, fought off MVP and hit the headbutt on Helms, before locking in the sharpshooter, which survived a MVP run in, before Helms tapped out.

Thoughts - 7.5/10 - Not quite an "8", but it was a good match, with a really hot finish.

Deuce & Domino def. Paul London & Brian Kendrick to win the WWE Tag Team Titles in a "Well, it was a helluva run.  Now split, feud and never be seen again..." match

Maryse welcomed us back as the Tag Team Champions came out, as Cole announced the run was currently at 334 days.  A pink Caddie then parked up behind the Ferrari as the challengers came out.  Kendrick started off with Jimmy Snuka's boy, Deuce.  Kendrick used his speed to get Deuce into the corner for a splash, London came in with a crossbody, before he tagged Kendrick back in, hitting the elbow on his opponents arm, as is their usual formula.  London came in with a mule kick to the arm.  Kendrick came back with a double armdrag, but Cherry drew the referee, as Domino cheapshotted Spanky.  London went to hit a moonsault off the apron, but Domino moved, London splatting on the floor.

Kendrick, all alone, was dragged into the heel corner, where Domino came in, dropping the elbow, as we saw medics checking on London.  The heels began to take Spanky to school, as it says in their theme song.  Cole & JBL did a good job of pointing how out London & Kendrick needed each other, and how Spanky was currently in a lot of trouble.  Domino put on a chinlock.  Spanky got out of it with a sunset flip, but it didn't take and Kendrick was put down again.  Deuce came in and got a 2 count.  This let Cole point out that the challenger had hot heads, spotting some frustration on Deuce's face.  Spanky missed a counter in the corner, allowing Deuce to drag Spanky out, bringing in Domino.  Kendrick began to throw fists, but was taken down with a hard clothesline for 2, furthering annoying Domino.  A pair of knees to the face brought in Deuce for a fist drop at 2, frustrating Deuce. Spanky fought back, punching the heels off, but Kendrick had nowhere to go.  He went to his corner, but he realised that London wasn't there, as Deuce took him down.  Domino came in, setting up a jumping back kick from Deuce for the three count and their first tag team titles!

Spanky checked on his partner at ringside as D & D celebrated.  Thankfully, Spanky didn't look angry...yet...

Thoughts - 6.5/10 - I can't decide if the finish was well booked or not.  It was because it told a really good story, but it kinda felt like it just came.  Really good story to the match though

Irony, thy name is Orton

This week, just as we hear that Randy Orton was sent home from the European tour, we went back to May 9th of 2002 as we saw Lance Storm came out with a young Randy Orton in the ring.  Indeed, it was only Orton's third week on Smackdown.  However, there was no referee in the ring.  Bob Holly's music then played and he came out with a ref's shirt on, giving Orton a big disadvantage.

It is truly amazing how much Orton had changed.  Not just physically, but his first move was a flying elbow.  As the feud went, Holly slow counted for Orton and fast counted for Storm, as they explained that Vinny Mac's assistant at the time, Stacy Keibler, fancied the pants off of Orton.  Orton hit a BEAUTIFUL flying crossbody with a tight pin.  However, Storm got Orton in the Straight Shooter (a.k.a. the Canadian Maple Leaf).Orton tried for the ropes, but Holly pushed the ropes away, forcing Orton to tap.  The heels beat down Orton.  VAL VENIS(!!!) made the save for the future Legend Killer.

We then cut right away to the following week and a tag match between the four men!  What a sight.  Orton being the face-in-peril needing to make the hot tag to Val Venis...  Orton hit the great crossbody again, before hitting the Playmaker, but they didn't get wins.  Storm hit a superkick, but Orton reversed the pin for the three.

Kane def. William Regal & Dave Taylor by Countout in a "Kane's a pussy.  How could he not finish them off quick style..." match

After a Mark Henry promo hyping his return in a fortnight's time, we saw William Regal & Dave Taylor in the ring.  The heels had to tag in and out.  Regal started for his team, but he was taken over with an armdrag.  Regal raked Kane's eyes in the corner, but Kane just downed Regal.  However, the southpaw came back with a couple of fists, allowing him to tag in Taylor.  Taylor rolled out, but Kane rolled him back in.  As Kane climbed the step, Regal shoved Kane off, his face hitting the steps.  Regal came in, and kicked Kane in the shoulder, before hitting knees to the face in the corner.  However, Kane downed Regal with a big right hand.  Regal tagged out as Cole hit a really crappy segue-way between the Olympics and a Kane punch.  Regal came back in and drove his knee into the back of Kane's head while Kane was down.  regal put a foot up in the corner, but Kane hit a back body drop.  Taylor jumped on Kane in the corner, before locking in a neck and arm hold.  Kane battled back, but Taylor stayed on top with a double axe handle to Kane’s back.  They hit a double suplex, with Regal going for a cover.  Regal tried to maul Kane, but he guarded well.  The exchanged dominant positions on the ground, before Taylor was brought in again with a dropkick and another arm/neck hold.  Regal came back in with kicks and knees to the face. 

Taylor came in and put Kane in a fireman's carry, allowing Regal to hit a knee to Kane's face for 2.  Regal came in, but Kane caught him.  However, the heels whipped Kane off the ropes, only to take a clothesline.  Kane dumped Taylor before hitting a sideslam on Regal.  Kane went up top, hitting the clothesline.  He primed for a chokeslam, but Taylor ran in to take a kick.  The heels went outside and headed for the hills.  Jimmy Korderas counted them out, giving Kane the win.

Thoughts - 6.5/10 - I don't time match, but that went about 6/7 minutes longer than I thought it would when I heard it was happening.  Despite the fairly poor finish, the rest of the match was really good stuff, and not how you'd expect a match like this to go, with the heels actually staying dominant over the monster until a mistake cost them.  This is possibly more how the tag match should have been booked when it came down to a 2 to 1, only with Kendrick getting a bunch of offence before the finish, as this felt like it built to a climax, whereas the tag match just kinda finished.

Oddly enough, it is a more even match for the Brits...

Backstage, Regal & Taylor were complaining to Teddy Long about Kane, prompting T Lo to decree that in London next week they would face Kane, and his partner, The Boogeyman.  Hey, the Brits might have a chance.  Boogey's crapiness surely cancels out some of Kane's goodness...

Kristal then came in to show off some of her shopping, which Teddy just so happened to have paid for.  They shared a kiss though.  Counting down the heel turn in 5...4...

Undertaker def. Ken Kennedy by DQ in a "Don't they realise De Ja Vu is French?" match

Kennedy came out first, calling for his mic.  He said that the people could call him anything they wanted, as he had the MITB case, before calling himself Mr. Kennedy...  before reneging on the second bit.  They then took a break before Undertaker came out.  Kennedy stuck and moved in the early going, but Taker caught him with a choke, but Kennedy fought out of it, only to run into a big boot.  The Deadman worked on Kennedy's arm, but Old School was blocked while Taker was on the top turnbuckle.  Taker pushed Kennedy off, but he went right back up and hit a superplex for 2.  Kennedy took it to Taker with right and kicks, but he was whipped into the corner, where he took a clothesline. The second attempt at Old School worked, with the Italian fans building up their cheer.  Kennedy was dumped to the outside as we took our final break.

Back live, Taker was putting the boots to Kennedy, sending Kennedy shoulder first into the corner, continuing to work the arm.  In the corner, Taker kept working on it, even with a headbutt to the shoulder.  However, he missed a charge, allowing Kennedy to wail away on Taker in the corner, while favouring the arm.  Kennedy took Taker down and began to work the left leg.  In the corner, Kennedy continued his assault with a running boot to the face.  Kennedy put on a top wristlock, but Taker got to his feet quickly.  Kennedy kneed Taker in the leg, but Undertaker shrugged Kennedy off, sending him to ringside.  Taker did his usual work on the apron, although it seemed as though the leg drop had done a bit of damage.  Kennedy countered a whip off the ropes with a swinging neckbreaker.  They had a slugfest, although Undertaker ran the ropes and hit a running clothesline.  Snake Eyes and a big boot followed.  Undertaker called for the chokeslam, and got hit.  But he then called for the Tombstone, as Finlay ran in.  Finlay was about to be chokeslammed, when Kennedy used the MITB case on Taker.  The heels then laid a beating similar to the beating on Batista earlier.  with Kennedy hitting the DDT again, and Finlay finishing it off with another Celtic Cross before Kennedy's music played.  Kennedy & Finlay left the Phenom lying as the show ended.

Thoughts - 7/10 - A good match, if a little similar to the first match, with the bigger face seemingly oddly working the mat and the arm in particular in the early stage.  This was a superior effort though.  Interesting booking with the heels getting uninterrupted beat-downs in too.

OVERALL - 7/10 (- 0.5 on last week) - This was a funny old Smackdown, with some interesting booking going on.  The beatdown of Batista & Undertaker, for example.  I mean, I didn't really expect anyone to make a save, but no-one would have blinked if Batista and/or Taker made comebacks.  And yet they didn't.

If I had to place money on it, I would say that Paul London's splatting will be the catalyst for a split, especially after a rematch where I'd bet something similar will happen.  How am I guessing this?  London's grown a beard.  trust me.  Beards = evil, unless you're Scottish (like moi), where they are statutory.  Chris Daniels came back with one, and he came back evil.

The handicap match was the most interestingly booked match, as it wasn't a squash.  Not at all.  Quite bizarre.  But in a good way.

That’s all I got for now, but if you have something to say about this week’s Smackdown, you can e-mail me at dedicated e-mail address, or come hunt me down on the WWI Forums!

OR, you can find me along with the rest of the dribbling masses on MY OWN MYSPACE PAGE!

Well, I’ll be back soon enough, but for now, I believe I’ve fulfilled my contractual obligations.  For reading this, And continuing to support World Wrestling Insanity, you’re cooler than the other side of the pillow…

I’m out.