After seeing “Impact” on Thursday,
WWE had a tough act to follow, but of the two shows,
Smackdown had the better chance.
The show opened playing up the arrival
of MNM to Smackdown in their “hometown,”
Hollywood. It wa portrayed as a major event with photographers,
press, screaming MNM fans, the whole nine yards. Long
came out and told MNM that they would be defending the
title against Batista and Eddie Guerrero. Their “fans”
cheered like crazy, but MNM seemed far less than thrilled.
Rey Mysterio and Matt Hardy pinned
JBL and Christian (guest referee Hardcore Holly)
This, of course, was Christian’s
last WWE match and he went out like a profession. He
worked hard and put his opponents over. If Matt Hardy
can come back, there’s no reason that Christian
cannot do the same one day. Hardy knocked both heels
from the ring, then dove from the ring to the floor
on them. They caught him, but Mysterio hit another dive
and knocked them all down. Hardy later hit Holly accidentally
and the two got into an altercation. During the commercial,
the heels took over on Rey Mysterio. After a few dropkicks,
Rey took over until JBL hit a clothesline. Rey tried
for a 619, but Christian pulled JBL out of the way.
Christian distracted Holly while JBL took Rey out of
the ring. After several minutes of a beatdown, Rey hot-tagged
Hardy, who got a two count on Christian, but couldn’t
hit a Twist of Fate. Hardy hit a legdrop for a two count.
Hardy went to all fours and allowed Rey to dive off
him onto both heels. Christian tried to use a chair,
but Holly grabbed it. Christian hit Holly from behind
and Holly hit an Alabama Slammer. This set up Rey’s
619 and Hardy’s Twist of Fate for the win as JBL
walked away.
Backstage, Teddy Long said that Eric Bischoff
was on the way to the arena as his guest.
Sharmell came to the ring to her own music
to introduce Booker T, and continued to crow about him
beating Benoit and setting him up. She demanded respect
from the fans. Booker T called the fans “a bunch
of suckers” and “a bunch of fools.”
He also said the fans were colorful and frankly, that
worried me a lot. It’s way too easy to play the
race card here and it’s unnecessary. He said he
knew what Sharmell was doing all along and said he should
have got an Emmy. The two introduced and laughed at
several replays of Sharmell’s interference.
Sharmell alone is annoying enough, but
Booker T joining in to sing his own praises is just
too much. If Booker T thinks that 90 percent of the
fans didn’t know what the payoff was going to
be, he’s the biggest sucker out there. But at
least they didn’t try to put race into it.
Teddy Long came out and Booker demanded
Long shake his hand. Long said he thought Booker T was
an honorable competitor and said that he stopped Benoit
from attacking Booker. He then said that Booker was
going to defend the title immediately against Benoit.
Sharmell and Booker were visibly upset.
Chris Benoit beat Booker T by
countout.
Benoit came out looking almost bored,
but the announcers played up how Booker was unprepared
for Benoit that night. Benoit started off strong, sending
Booker out of the ring until he got a temporary reprieve
by throating Benoit on the top rope. But Benoit came
back quickly for a two count. Sharmell grabbed Benoit’s
leg and distracted him temporarily, but he saw Booker
sneaking up on him. This makes Benoit the smartest wrestler
in history, since no one else ever seemed to figure
out what was coming in that situation.. Booker dropped
Benoit on the top rope and went after his ribs and back.
Benoit fought out of a chinlock, but Booker whipped
him into the corner and further hurt his back. Benoit
recovered and hit Booker with the “hat trick”
of German suplexes. Benoit went to the top rope for
a headbutt, ignoring Sharmell, but missed. He still
recovered and hit Booker with two more German suplexes,
but Booker blocked the third one. Booker grabbed the
rope to prevent a crossface, then just left the ring.
If the point of the match was to portray Booker as a
coward who can’t win without his wife, they did
it. I never bought Booker as a heel before, but now
I can buy into it.
A video recap of Smackdown on Taboo Tuesday.
Great to hear Joey Styles again, and I was thrilled
to not have to see another Edge-Matt Hardy match-up.
I was also pleased to see Batista get put over so well.
Rowdy Roddy Piper beat Cowboy
Bob Orton by DQ
Orton came out and said that Piper put
him to sleep last week. Well, Orton did it to us for
years, didn’t he? He complained that Piper can’t
fight his own battles and that he did Piper’s
dirty work while Piper got the glory. Orton seems oblivious
of the fact that Piper knew how to cut a promo and Orton
counldn’t convince Superman to avoid kryptonite.
Piper’s music interrupted him and Hot Rod came
out. Orton wrapped a belt around his fist while the
referee checked Piper and then clocked Piper with it.
Piper fought back, but Orton hit him with a rake to
the eyes and an atomic drop. Orton stayed on Piper in
the corner and put him in a rear chinlock. Orton followed
with a kneelift and a lousy backbreaker. Piper slapped
on the sleeper, and Orton was going out again until
Randy Orton came out and attacked Piper. He continued
to heat on Piper while Cowboy held off the referee.
Orton the younger grabbed the mike and said that without
his father Piper would have been nothing. He said he
used to look up to Piper, but now he was ashamed of
him. Piper told him to go to hell. Orton said Piper
may be a legend but that he is…all together now…that’s
right…and bragged that he killed the Undertaker
before hitting the RKO.
After a commercial, they recapped what
happened about four minutes ago!
Bobby Lashley defeated Nunzio
and Big Vito in a handicapped match.
Well, I guess some ethnic groups are still
OK to mock. Nunzio and Vito came out as Tazz and Cole
made references to the Sicilian Silencer and piasans.
Because after all, all Italians are thugs and uneducated
criminals and…you know, it’s just easier
to call this stupid, isn’t it? The two started
off well enough, knocking Lashley down but failing to
pin him. Lashley quickly recovered and manhandled them
both. He knocked Vito from the ring and then picked
up Vito into his still-unnamed finisher, even taking
a second to knock Vito back off the ring apron before
finishing him off.
Backstage, Eric Bischoff pulled into the
building in his limo and encountered The Boogeyman.
“Welcome to Friday Night Smackdown, Mr. Bischoff,”
Tazz mocked as Bischoff walked away, obviously thinking
that maybe the situation on Raw isn’t as bad as
he though. Well, actually it’s probably worse,
but that’s beside the point.
Long came out to welcome Bischoff. Well,
what he did was ask the fans to give him an “appropriate”
welcome. He got it, as fans booed him and Tazz dissed
him. Bischoff came out dressed in a grey suit that looked
like it was poured from concrete, with several security
guards. Bischoff said the Raw vs Smackdown feud was
out of control. He admitted that Long took the fight
to Raw, like he brought the fight to WWE when he ran
WCW. Geez, even Matt Hardy would tell this guy to let
it go! Bichoff challenged Long to a Raw vs Smackdown
ten-man elimination match at Survivor Series. Bischoff
called Smackdown the B-show with second-rate talent,
management and fans.
My fiance’s observation of the night:
“Eric, aren’t these the same fans that go
to your shows?”
Long said that Bischoff “B”
talking out of his mind and that he was going to lose
to Smackdown like he did to McMahon. Bischoff got upset
and told Long not to mention that. Then why does he
keep bringing it up? It reminds me of a basketball player
that used to brag that he and another guy combined for
48 points one night, but got mad when people pointed
out that he only scored four of them.
Long challenged Bischoff to another Raw
vs Smackdown match: Long vs Bischoff. Bischoff looked
as if was about to pee himself, but accepted. Long then
told the security to remove the “cracker”
from the show and mocked Bischoff’s alleged martial
arts prowess. Why does Bischoff seem to forget that
he knows karate when people challenge him to a fight?
A promo for the Undertaker followed and
concluded with a verse from the book of Matthew in the
Bible. Where’s the significance, did Jesus dress
in black and chokeslam people?
Ken Kennedy pinned Scotty 2 Hotty.
Kennedy will be one of those guys in the
Survivor Series match, that’s for sure. This was
pretty much a squash, and Kennedy took time to taunt
the fans at ringside. The fans were otherwise dead.
At one point, Tazz said Scotty was about to pull out
the worm. He does and I’ll call the FCC! Kennedy
hit the Magic Bullet and was bleeding from the forehead
after the match.
MNM (with Melinda) defeated World
Heavyweight Champion Batista and Eddie Guerrero to retain
the WWE Tag Team Titles
MNM came out to their typical Hollywood
entrance, and the faces came out in Eddie’s new
lowrider. The announcers marveled at Batista battering
Coach at Taboo Tuesday and said Smackdown has established
itself as the flagship show of WWE. Why do they even
bother to have the World Champion go for the tag team
titles? When the top champion wins another belt, doesn’t
he always have to give it up anyways? Melina tried to
distract the referee, but it backfired and Batista sent
both MNM members over the top rope with a clothesline
while Eddie chased Melina. After a commercial, Eddie
choked Mercury with the tag rope while Batista distracted
the referee in an interesting reversal. Eddie spent
most of the match acting like a heel, which makes sense.
Why do heels always forget all their tricks when they
turn face? Eddie tried a nice trick, hiding the ring
bell hammer in his tights while carrying a chair into
the ring. While the referee was distracted with the
chair, Eddie tried to use the hammer but Melina grabbed
it from him. Eddie almost got Melina, but Nitro hit
him with a bodypress outside the ring to take control
for his team. Up to then it was kind of plodding as
everyone seemed to be killing time between Eddie’s
antics. The interesting part of the match actually happened
at the end when Batista tagged in and took over on both
of MNM. Eddie came back in and went for the frog splash
and crushed Melina, who came into the ring to hand Mercury
a set of brass knuckles, which he used to cold-cock
Eddie for the pin. Afterwards, Batista seemed disgusted
at the result.
Three stars of the night:
Number three star: Booker
T
Number two star: Christian
Number one star: Chris
Benoit
Check me out online at:
http://www.geocities.com/bobbyknightmare/megaweaponsgarage.html,
for “The Starfighters,” which features Congressman
Bob Dornan and the worst line in movie history, and
http://www.geocities.com/bobbyknightmare/ulcbedford.html,
with a tribute to Rosa Parks, a woman who knew when
to stop talking and start doing.
And if you’re in the southern Pittsburgh
area on Saturday, check out the Championship Wrestling
Federation’s November Reign show at the Monessen
Civic Center at 7:30 p.m. For more information, check
them out online at www.cwf-online.com.
Order
the Jake the Snake DVD Set
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