Paul O'Brien
Vince's Donkey Punch
By Paul O'Brien
Oct 14, 2005, 16:57

Vince called him down, bent him over and not only had his way with him, he Donkey Punched him too.

All the better for Vince. Sucks to be JR.

Jim Ross is the best announcer of his, mine, and anybody’s generation. He served his employer well, even calling a UK PPV before arriving home to tend to his own Mothers funeral. He held the clusterfuck know as RAW together for nearly a decade. Simply put, Jim Ross was indispensable.

Or so common sense said.

The last shot of JR was of him holding his marbles while being laughed at by ¾ of the McMahon family. I just hope that he at least got a peek up Stephanie’s dress before leaving. Scant consolation for a man who managed to put together one of the best rosters ever, managed the house show business and turned shit into roses weekly on RAW.

If this is the end for Ross, you have to feel for the man.

Even if Vince does a U-turn, in the face of loosing UFC announcer Mike Goldberg, JR would have to feel like the wife who can come home just because her husband can’t attract anyone prettier.

And that seems like the word of this whole situation; pretty. Ross is and always was un-pretty. His head and body sat in tandem like the loops of a figure eight. He was not employed for his looks and should not be let go for them. It’s the emotion, the skill, the lost art of storytelling, the passion, the connection, the respect, the honesty, the credibility, the means to get across an impossible mix of athletic ability, farce, soap opera, genius, stupidity and wrestling.

Vince may or may not be already after backing out of his initial decision to banish JR to behind the curtain. He matters not. His intent was clear. Nobody goes home till he says so.

If Dorothy had have worked for WWE when she clicked those heels, someone named McMahon would have booted her in the snatch. Take that home to Kansas with you bitch.

Everything changes. That’s fine. We all, as people watching the news, looking out our windows and looking at pictures of ourselves with mullets, understand that. The thing about JR is; he was on his way back up again.

Ironically, it was the burn out from the office that came across to the wrestling audience. Ross made successful moves to fix that, giving up his position as VP of Talent Relations and requesting his ill fated move him to Oklahoma. His work on the mic began to pick up again. JR never slipped too far but now he was top of his own tree again.

Then they recognized that he wasn’t a beautiful man.

Immediately Vince wanted to nail him. What? Ever seen Linda? The script was drawn in crayon by Steph and handed to Daddy.

“Quite frankly, It’s great but not enough embarrassment, go and ask Mom if she wants kick JR in the nuts?”

And so it was. Ugliness ended in the ugliest of ways. Summoned before the boss, kicked in the balls and laughed at.

I hope it’s all after morphing into a work at this stage but I think not.

Get those red shoes on you, JR. I just hope you stop off in Memphis on your way home.

God bless.

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E-Mail Paul at:

Paul@WorldWrestlingInsanity.com