ZAH
Shakin' My Head: Monday Night Impact, Dusty is ECW, the Christian Coalition, the harsh truth about RVD, Loser of the Week, plus much more!
By ZAH
Feb 9, 2007, 06:00

02-09-07

“You live for the fight when it’s all that you’ve got.”

Boo-yah, here we go!!

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Item #1 – Can TNA finally do it?

This Monday marks the first time in years that a wrestling program as gone un-opposed in a 2-hour prime-time timeslot.  USA Network, in all its wisdom and glory, is bumping RAW for the Westminster Dog & Kennel Show (or whatever the hell it’s called).  Spike TV, in a brilliant move, is showing a 2-hour TNA Impact during that timeslot. 

So the question becomes, “Can TNA give RAW a run for their money?”

And the answer is......no.

At least not yet.  Let’s be realistic, folks...TNA is barely pulling in 1.0’s and 1.1’s in their current time slot.  Whether or not you want to blame the time slot is entirely subjective, but the fact of the matter is that Impact hasn’t grown very much in viewers since debuting on Spike last year (regardless of how you spin it, going from a 0.9 to a 1.1 isn’t really that big of a deal...especially when MTV’s Wrestling Society X just pulled down a 1.0 upon their debut).

I would be absolutely SHOCKED to see Impact pull anything higher than a 1.5 for this Monday’s unopposed show.  Why?  They need a consistent 2-hour product...not a one-time 2-hour spot-fest designed to attract new viewers.  The overall product needs to improve...dramatically.

I’m not saying that WWE is awesome or that TNA sucks...I’m saying that TNA needs a lot of work. A lot.  It’s a shame because I’ve been saying that for months now and things appear to be worse now than they were before.  I won’t go into details because I feel like I’ve been down that road too many times already, but the proof is in the ratings and PPV buys.  TNA is too busy cutting costs and trying to be WWE-lite when they should be developing their own unique identity and brand (jeez...out of the gate WSX is already unique and different...Ring of Honor is unique and different...Pro Wrestling NOAH is unique and different...see what I’m saying?  TNA is same old, same old...).

My hope is that Spike sees the potential ratings that could develop from a 2-hour weekly Impact and give the green light.  Otherwise, things just won’t be changing anytime soon.

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Item #2 – It’s doubtful if you believe the rumors...

Well...the rumors going around are that the TNA locker room is a horrible place to be in right now.  At least it’s a horrible place if you’re an “undercard” talent.  In other words, if your name isn’t Samoa Joe, Kurt Angle, Sting, Christian Cage, or Abyss...you’re probably not very happy.  The actual word going around right now is “miserable” so don’t let my sugar-coating fool you.

Who’s to blame?  Well, you could start off with the fact that the upper card guys are now dressing in separate locker rooms from the rest of the crew.  That in and of itself probably isn’t the only reason why there is misery.  I hate pointing fingers but it’s pretty clear by watching Impact that the booking committee is to blame. 

But ZAH...everybody’s getting some television time so why the booking committee?

Ummm...yeah.  The problem is that everybody’s getting about one match per month to display their talents on television (normally on a PPV, not Impact)...otherwise they’re being shown in split-second vignettes that have no beginning and no end...just a ridiculous middle.  These are guys who absolutely love what they do.  Some of them are absolutely great at what they do and are simply not getting the opportunity to do what they love.

No big deal?  You think that they should be happy...y’know, being on television and all?

Well, it was just announced that all TNA employees now must get approval from management before doing any kind of interviews.  Not only that, but if they say anything negative about the company they’ll end up losing the equivalent of their next PPV payoff.

So that isn’t bad enough, you say?  WWE constricts their wrestlers’ interviews all the time?  Fine...how ‘bout this?

They’re getting yelled at for using psychology in their matches.

No kidding.  Seriously.  Get this...they’re getting yelled at for trying to use rest holds.  They’re getting yelled at for trying to tell an in-ring story.  Heck, they’re getting yelled at for working body parts!  Not only that, but they’re getting upset that the Orlando crowd is now only “popping” for high-spots, resulting in primarily quiet matches.

Still not enough to complain about?  Hmmm...tough crowd, you guys.  Alright, how ‘bout the fact that many of the undercarders don’t even know if they’re supposed to be a babyface or a heel?  Even Kurt Angle stated in an interview last week that he didn’t know what he was supposed to be.  The leader of the pack and new star of your promotion doesn’t know how to act because he doesn’t know if he’s a face or a heel.

How crazy is it that some of the under-utilized guys are now looking at WSX as an option?  I mean, this upstart MTV promotion has got “train wreck” written all over it yet some of TNA’s guys are so unhappy that they’re willing to move to California for a couple of weeks per year in order to flip/flop around like a Mexican jumping bean in front of 100 people.

I’ve been saying for months that TNA was stagnant.  I’ve been saying for months that TNA needed to do something to make them stand out from WWE in order to thrive.  What’s happened is that they’ve done whatever they could possible do (***cough***Vince Russo***cough***) in order to look like WWE-lite...and do so in a one-hour format.  Then, in an effort to get everybody on the roster “over”, they threw the undercard guys into 20-second vignettes that made little-to-no sense and expected them to be happy and for ratings to climb.

I’m sorry...but TNA is f*cked-up right now.  As much as I want them to succeed, I’m going with the Lance Storm school of thought and just saying to hell with Impact until they can get their shit in order.  At least with WWE I expect a bullshit show and I’m normally happy when a decent RAW or SmackDown appears on my television.  I expect more from TNA because they’re the underdogs trying to fight the good fight for the fans.  Well...until they smarten the hell up I’m through with them.

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Having said that...I’ll be watching what they can do with 2 hours on Monday.  Just don’t tell anybody because I’m boycotting them, okay?

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Item #3 – They’re doing it again?

Y’know, the last time WWE had a 4-way tag team ladder match, nobody knew about it until the PPV and then somebody got seriously injured in the process.  At No Way Out, there’s going to be yet another train wreck with four teams with the tag titles at stake.

I, for one, think the titles are changing hands.  Yes, London & Kendrick are the longest reigning tag team champions since Demolition (wow...think about that for a second), but their time is over.  Why?  Because they’re not.

Get it?  They’re not “over”.  Jeez...tough crowd.

No...I think MNM’s got the titles wrapped-up at the PPV.  I think it only makes perfect sense.  Storyline-wise, there needs to be some kind of crazy-ass match at WrestleMania featuring the Hardyz and MNM (TLC, anyone?), so for the Hardyz to win and give everybody a warm, fuzzy feeling at Mania you need the heel team to go in as tag champs.  Hence, a title change after this ladder match.

Of course, I could be totally wrong and London & Kendrick could still walk out with the belts.  I’m not normally wrong (don’t quote me on that) so we’ll just have to wait and see.

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Item #4 – Dusty Rhodes + ECW = $$$.

Oh yeah...when you think EXTREME you automatically think Dusty Rhodes, don’t you? 

Well, honestly, before you brush it off you’d better look up Dusty’s history.  He’s been in quite a few hardcore battles in his life (and yes, even before the Steve Corino feud...) so he probably knows the true meaning of hardcore better than most.

But of course, Vince has pretty much thrown out the whole “hardcore” portions of ECW leaving it “extreme” in name only.  So where does that leave Rhodes?  Well, ECW is now being groomed to compete against MTV’s Wrestling Society X (boy...for a 30-minute spot fest it sure has some people’s feathers ruffled, no?).  ECW’s head writer Dave Lagana wanted Rhodes to come over from his SmackDown duties to help him with ideas.

Yeah...Rhodes has been working with Michael Hayes on SmackDown, which is quickly becoming WWE’s star child.  I mean, SmackDown did a frickin’ 3.1 last week (!!!) and the CW Network’s president of entertainment, Dawn Ostroff, recently raved over SmackDown’s performance thus far on the network.

Anyway, the bottom line is that Rhodes is on a hot streak.  Out of anybody working creative for WWE right now, I think Rhodes is probably the best in terms of helping to make ECW something watchable, which it isn’t at the moment.

We’ll have to wait and see, obviously, but I’m actually looking forward to what direction Rhodes & Lagana lead ECW into.  Not only that, but it should be interesting to see if anything detrimental happens on SmackDown in the coming months.

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Item #5 – Long live the Christian Coalition.

I love rumours.  Y’know, whether or not this one is true doesn’t really matter...I’m just loving the idea of it.

Apparently, there are plans to form a new heel stable in TNA.  This new stable would contain Christian Cage, AJ Styles, Scott Steiner, and Tyson Tomko.  Now, I don’t know about you, but I’m actually stoked at the possibilities from this foursome.  You’ve got the natural charisma of Cage (who’s a million times better as a smarmy heel than a cocky babyface), the increasing entertainment from a chicken-shit AJ Styles (who’s developing more personality now than he has in his entire career), the no-nonsense “who knows what he’ll say next” possibilities of Steiner (who seems re-vitalized in TNA), and Tyson Tomko.

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Hehehe...yeah, Tomko’s not too bad, either.  I like him as a bodyguard type and I think it suits him just fine.

Anyhoo, the top priority of the faction will be to keep the NWA title on Ric Flair Christian Cage so they’ll have constant challengers in Samoa Joe, Kurt Angle, Abyss, Rhino, and Christopher Daniels.

I, for one, am hoping that Russo doesn’t muck this up because this really has potential to take off.  It’s an angle like this that can attract viewers.  If you can attract viewers, then hopefully you can then find a way to make them stay.

Hopefully.

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Item #6 – Has RVD given his notice?

Listen...there’s been more rumor over the past week about RVD’s status than there has been RVD on my television screen.  The bottom line is this...if Rob Van Dam has, indeed, given his notice to WWE then all the power to him.  If WWE wants to job Van Dam out to every Tom, Dick, or Harry that ECW throws his way then he’ll get some offense in and then do the job on the way out the door in style.

If, however, RVD hasn’t given his notice and is re-signing with WWE then everybody needs to take a step back and ask themselves why RVD is mired in the upper-midcard and not the main event.  It’s too easy to sit back and blame RVD’s booking on his drug bust while WWE/ECW champ.  I mean, years leading up to his title victory over John Cena he was a multi-time Intercontinental and WWE tag team champion who never got his shot at being “the man”.  Well, he got his shot and whether or not his reign ended early shouldn’t matter.  Once he lost the title, he was going to go right back where he originated.

WHAT???

Yep...I said it.  RVD is an upper midcard talent, at best.  He’s a spot-fest wrestler who couldn’t throw a legit-looking punch if he was in a shoot fight.  His offense, while innovative ten years ago, is sluggish and predictable.  He gets people to pop for certain moves but lacks the ability to carry them through an entire match.  He’s Jeff Hardy without the silly make-up.

ZAH, you’re an idiot!!  RVD rocked in ECW against the likes of Jerry Lynn!!

True, but the genius of ECW was that Paul Heyman constantly booked his wrestlers in a certain way to accentuate their positives and hide their weaknesses.  RVD’s matches (especially the ones with Lynn) were carefully crafted and well-performed...but they were spot-fests.  They were GREAT spot-fests, but spot-fests nonetheless. 

RVD was given the ball and Vince wasn’t overly happy with his performance as champ.  The fact that RVD got busted only sped-up the eventual outcome.  The guy is entertaining, but he’s not a main-eventer anymore.  If they eventually goes to TNA, then he’ll be thrown into the main-event and will probably become NWA champion and will have fantastic matches against the likes of Samoa Joe, Christopher Daniels, and AJ Styles.  Will that prove me wrong and show he’s a great wrestler?  Nope...because they’ll still be spot-fests. 

Sorry, gang...but the truth sometimes hurts.

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Item #7 – Hear this song.

As you all know, I’m a huge 80’s hair-metal fan.  Throughout the 90’s and into the 00’s I’ve learned to enjoy and appreciate almost all forms of music, yet I’ve always been drawn into a great rock’n’roll song.  The first time I heard this one I was immediately taken back to a grander time when bands had more hairspray than talent.  It was a time where a hook wasn’t something on the end of a pirate’s arm, it was something that made a good rock song great.

This, folks, has a ‘hook’.  I’ve never been a big fan of Buckcherry, but this song has taken me by storm.  The YouTube video probably isn’t “official”, but it’s all that’s available until the real video comes out.  While not a great live band, these guys have figured out a way to make a great arena anthem in-studio (think G’n’R during Axl’s early drug years).

Everything by Buckcherry.  If you enjoy the same time of music I do, then you’ll love this song.  Give it a whirl.

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Item # 8 – LOSER OF THE WEEK.

Each and every week, I pick somebody (not necessarily always from wrestling) who has either acted in a dumb way, said something stupid, or generally was an idiot in some way, shape, or form.  This week was easy.  As soon as I heard this story on the radio I knew nobody else on the planet could come close.  Due to the fall-out of last weekend’s Super Bowl, ZAH’s Loser of the Week this time around is...

Peyton Manning!!!

No no no...not that Peyton Manning, THIS Peyton Manning!

Okay, here’s the deal.  There was a guy from Forsyth, Illinois named Scott Weise.  I say “was” because he’s no longer Scott Weise.  Y’see, Scott is a huge Chicago Bears fan.  Absolutely HUGE.  Such a big fan, in fact, that he told his friends that he’d officially change his name to Peyton Manning if the Bears were to falter in the Super Bowl.  To prove how sure he was the Bears were going to win, he actually signed a petition in front of 200 people the week before in a bar saying that he would do it of Rex Grossman couldn’t lead the Bears to the promised land.

Well...the Bears lost the Super Bowl.  On Tuesday, Scott braved a snowstorm in order to head to the Macon County Courts Facility and begin the proceedings to officially change his name from Scott Weise to Peyton Manning. 

"I think I kind of represent all Bears fans," he said. "Not that I'm saying they're all idiots like me, but I represent their passion because I really care about my team, you know?"

Do I really have to go on?

Therefore, it’s with great pleasure that I name Scott Weise Peyton Manning on being my Loser of the Week! 

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Pillar to Post 

Each and every week I’ll take three statements that you, the WorldWrestlingInsanity.com readers, have submitted on the hot topics du jour and then get two or three volunteers to give their thoughts and insight.  Ladies and gentlemen, this week (and I encourage every reader to throw me an e-mail and volunteer), I was able to find three great World Wrestling Insanity readers (and a couple of first-timers, to boot!) in Squeak, liviya, and StraightXEdge!

1. Agree or Disagree
Shawn Michaels should not be facing John Cena at WrestleMania.

Squeak: Disagree.

While the WWE was put in a difficult position because of Hunters injury, they accomplished their goal of putting the two most over people in the main event at WrestleMania. I also like that Rated RKO has dissolved and might subsequently have a good match at WM because of it.

I’m more curious to see who wins the MITB match this year then what the possible Michaels/Undertakers title runs will be like.

liviya: Disagree.

While this matchup does absolutely nothing for me, what other options has the last year of RAW left us with? Shawn Michaels single-handedly defeats the entire roster on any given week and John Cena can beat all of the "unbeatable" monsters that Vince and company throw at him. Who else is there? Edge/Cena has been done to death already. Giving a shot to Orton seems like a huge joke. There's nobody else on the roster that the booking team will allow to have a push for more than 3 weeks.

StraightXEdge: Disagree

Shawn Michaels has proven time and again that when it comes to the big matches he takes it up a notch which is why I see Shawn vs. Cena as the best possible match they could offer. Face vs. Face hasn’t been done for a while and seems quite fresh.

Although Orton-Cena was seen as the big match between the two guys that would take the company to the heights of Rock-Austin, I don’t see that as the case anymore. Although it would also be fresh I don’t think it offers what it would have when Orton was heel the first time.

As for Edge, at this point I would love to see the title on him but at the same time I would like to see him in a fresh feud with someone apart from Cena.

2. Agree or Disagree
WWE’s tag team division is finally important again.

Squeak: Disagree.

Kendrick and London are now the 2nd longest reigning tag champs in history of the company, but WWE would rather book the Hardy Boys/MNM (don’t get me wrong I like the matches) at PPV’s. Deuce and Domino have great charisma and could be a great tag team, but were pushed with the Highlanders formula. Win big in your debut, beat the champs in a non-title match, lose to the champs in a title bout, then try to stay off Heat. Michaels and Cena just won the belts from Rated RKO in a very good match, but they don’t even bother to carry the belts with them to the ring (with the exception of Michaels for the three-way last Monday)

The TAG team CHAMPIONS of the WOOOOOORLD should be the 3rd and 4th most important people on their brand, behind the Heavyweight/WWE and Intercontinental/US Champions. Kendrick and London just seem like a Smackdown afterthought to me. I do think Cena and Shawn will lose the belts, maybe to Benjamin and Haas, to show that they just can’t get along as a team etc… That leaves us a WM match of The Worlds Greatest Tag Team vs. Cryme Tyme.

Sigh.

liviya: Disagree.

StraightXEdge: Agree (for now).

At the moment the tag division on SmackDown! is very strong while I see the RAW titles as something to further the feud between Cena and Michaels, which isn’t so good. Smackdown’s division is strong but only for as long as The Hardy's and MNM stick around, which in my estimation isn’t long. I do see a Hardy's vs. MNM match at WrestleMania so we'll have to wait and see.

RAW's tag titles however have been dead since the reign of Hurricane and Rosie to be perfectly honest. Every time we think a new team can breathe life into the division they are squashed by whoever is over at the time. Cases in point: Cade and Murdoch, the Spirit Squad, the Highlanders, etc. The list could go on and on and I for one am not getting too excited about where the tag titles on RAW are going.  SmackDown is a different case.

3. Agree or Disagree
The New Breed vs. ECW Originals could actually revive the brand.

Squeak: Agree/Disagree (I hate it when people give these answers…so mad at myself right now).

Disagree: This gimmick doesn’t have main event implications because the strap is on someone, Lashley, who isn’t an ECW original and probably won't be turned heel anytime soon. I just feel like this storyline will be used to bury 4 out of the 5 originals once and for all, sparing RVD (if he re-signs with WWE) or Sabu, while getting over newcomers like Burke and Thorn so they can be moved to Raw or Smackdown.

Agree: If Punk joins the originals as a showing of respect, then turns on them becoming the leader of “the new breed”, bringing back the better than you gimmick…then this will work. It would bring some drama back to the ECW program that isn’t related to nights when RAW superstars are coming on the show. Heel Punk vs. Lashley at WrestleMania would be an interesting match...unless we’re all dying for Lashley/Test THREE! Who am I kidding it’s probably going to be Lashley/Snitsky.

Sigh.

liviya: Disagree.

StraightXEdge:  Just kill it and get it over with (disagree).

To be quite honest I remember watching the two One Night Stand’s and I can say that I at that time would have loved for ECW to start again...what a fool I was. While the Originals vs. the New Breed sounds slightly interesting, I do believe the damage has already been done. It would be interesting to see CM Punk possibly turning heel and joining the New Breed and show what he really can do when given the chance to run with the ball, that probably won’t happen though.

ECW as a brand was never really going to succeed with Vincent K McMahon driving it. I think now would be the best time to stop tarnishing such a good memory of such a good company and to end the experiment now.

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Great job guys, thanks!!  I’m looking forward to seeing who gets to join me as a guest columnist next week. 

No problem.  Seriously...it’s not a problem at all.  It’s a whole new year and my waiting list is sitting at one so NOW is the time for you to participate.  Really...RIGHT NOW!!  You can let me know either by e-mailing me at Zah@worldwrestlinginsanity.com or hitting me up at ZAH Nation, found in the Insanity Message Board and letting me know that you’d like to participate.  Also, don’t forget to stop by my MySpace page and add me.

So until next week…

L8R