Smackdown
Aaron Wood's Smackdown - Undertaker Faces Finlay & King Booker On His Lonesome
By Aaron Wood
Mar 23, 2007, 20:26

LAST WEEK ON SMACKDOWN:  Kane needed an errand boy, Hornswaggle looked for love, MVP downed a cup of coffee and Finlay (probably) went WWWWHHHHHHEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!

THIS WEEK…

McMahon Mimics Meanwhile Making Matches...

Kicking things off this week, we have THE BOSS~!  No, not Springsteen.  Vince.  Why would you think it'd be Springsteen?  This is a wrestling show.  Anyway, Big Vince came out (in a God-awful jacket), and he was a little bit proud of himself.  He said he enjoyed last Monday on RAW, sending Trump a message via some memorable footage, sending us to a recap of Eugene's transformation from retard to a doppelganger for Rory from The Highlanders (And what was that white stuff on his head, when they did the reveal?).  Vince said it was fun, wondering how embarrassed Eugene was, and saying that Eugene may "never be the same again"...

Now Vince...WHY IN THE BLUE HELL DID YOU HAVE TO SAY THAT?!?!?!  You see, on just about every wrestling forum I visit, and from some respected commentators, you know what I see advocated?  That Eugene should reveal that he was faking it all along!  Do you people listen to yourselves???  You are advocating that a man who has played a "special" person for nigh on THREE YEARS suddenly drops everything and reveals that he was faking it all along!  THREE YEARS!  Why in the hell would he keep up the pretence for three years and why would a hair cut be the impetus to reveal all?  Do you advocates not realise that this would be stupidity on the level of "Katie Vick"?  I even know a guy who devoted four pages of his book detailing how mind-numbingly dumb it was.  If there ever was a time for Eric Bischoff's nephew to reveal (presumably to his entire family, since Eric believed he was "special", and you'd think the family would have known if Eugene had started faking it!), it was not at all long after he debuted in the first place.  Not three years down the line!  And given how quick the IWC is to rip the WWE or TNA/Vince Russo to shreds for their crappy angles, I can't believe so many people think that a "Eugene becomes normal" angle would be any better in any shape or form whatsoever!!!  Frankly, if they do "go there", and it turns out to be the garbage it can only possibly be, then you have no-one but yourselves to blame, and in my opinion, next time any company does a crappy angle, you have no recourse for complaint then either!  I mean, I can understand why everyone wants Nick "Eugene" Dinsmore to have a "normal" gimmick and be the really good wrestler he is, but now isn't the time to do it and a Samson-like "Lose the hair and lose the 'tard" excuse isn't the way to do it either.  Thing is, they crapped out by doing the reveal, because the one way they could have re-tooled Dinsmore at this point was for him to lose ALL his hair (including the beard), and stick him on another show, with another name in new attire, and I would have wagered money that it would have taken a lot of people a while to notice.

But I digress.  Vince said that if we thought Eugene looked stupid, then Trump would look worse, before reiterating that when he shaves Trump's head, we're all getting crew-cuts.  He moved onto Austin being the referee, but Vince seemed happy, as a couple of weeks ago, he got in Trump's face, and guaranteed that there would be a bald guy.  Vince then talked about the match he made on RAW for Lashley against "his toughest opponent yet", his very self.  Anyway, Vince figured he would have some fun tonight, and that Bobby Lashley should be a part of it.  he brought out Bobby Lashley's opponent.  KENNEDY!  Well, that's a hell of a clue.  Mr. Kennedy came out to the ring, as we saw a big, proper banner in support of Kennedy.  McMahon did Kennedy's "Repeat the surname" bit, before introducing Lashley's OTHER opponent.  Cue Randy Orton.  McMahon then decided to give Orton the same treatment he gave Kennedy, so he wandered over to the turnbuckle and did Orton's pose.  Orton promised not to let McMahon.  Kennedy then took the mic and thanked McMahon for the chance to kick Lashley's ass again.  Vince got a little bit pissy, at this point, since neither man could get it done individually, so they could maybe get it done together.  So it would be a Handicap Tables match.  McMahon left as, well, I suppose you could call them "RKennedyO" shook hands.

Paul London & Brian Kendrick def. MNM to retain the WWE Tag Team Titles in a "If only this were 9 days later..." match

And so, MNM got a title shot after beating the Champions last week.  You'd think they'd have asked for it at Wrestlemania.  I mean, You'd think they wouldn't want to work the biggest show of the year...

Anyway, Mercury and London started this one off, but thanks to Nitro helping Mercury out, MNM isolated London in quick time.  Mercury got in a bearhug, but London reversed it into a roll up for 2.  However, when Mercury pushed London off, he made the tag to Spanky.  However, that wasn't the end game, as Nitro blocked Kendrick’s Sliced Bread #2 effort.  London was tagged in, but MNM almost managed to hit the Snapshot.  However, Kendrick blocked that, taking himself and Mercury out.  Nitro and London headed up top, where London fought Nitro off.  Melina tired to interfere, but Ashley pulled her off the apron, allowing London to hit a crossbody off the top for the win!

Thoughts - 6/10 - Woefully short, but it was good while it lasted.

Jimmy Wang Yang def. Chavo Guerrero in a "Now, please let this happen 9 days from now..." Non-Title match

After what may or may not have been a cut out Kane/Kristal interview (which is a bit weird, since it featured the "See No Evil" hook and right before Smackdown started the UK release of the film got an advert for it's (Straight To) DVD release on Monday, so it couldn't have been for that reason surely.

They traded whips into the corner, which Yang got the better of, when he came off the ropes with a kick.  a couple more kicks sent Chavo to the outside, where Yang hit a baseball slide on Chavo.  Back in, however, Chavo dropkicked a flying Yang, taking control of the match.  A back suplex followed by an uppercut scored a 2 count.  Chavo settled into a top wrist-lock, but Yang fought his way out.  He came off the ropes into a dropkick by Chavo.  A snapmare was followed into a surfboard by Chavo.  When Yang got out of it, Chavo clotheslined Jimmy for 2.  Chavo dropped Yang on the top rope, before working the wristlock again, before switching to an Abdominal Stretch.  A charge was countered, allowing Yang to hit a headscissors before following up with a back body drop and a couple of clotheslines.  However, Chavo ducked a spinning kick, before going for the Three Amigos.  He managed 2 before he was pushed off.  Chavo ran up top and tried a moonsault, which missed, although Chavo landed on his feet.  However, Yang had ducked underneath, followed Chavo and hit a moonsault of his own for the three count!

Thoughts - 7/10 - Again, it felt short, but they did quite a bit in that time.  Chavo wasn't exactly consistent on working over Yang, but all in all it was a pretty decent match.  Thankfully, Yang did the "I want your belt" signal, so there may be a Mania match in the offing...

Cole & JBL then sent it to the classy Arnold Skaaland tribute video, before we took a commercial break.

MVP def. The Lichtensteinian (that's how it's said, folks) Wrestling Champion, Cedrick Von Haussen in a "Next week, I’m calling San Marino!" Non-Title match

MVP made his way out, and after berating TONY THE CHIM~! for his fashion sense, he introduced his opponent.  And by golly, if they didn't look at the map, as they scored with naming the biggest city in the country!  Suffice to say, this one was short, and MVP ended it with the Playmaker.

MVP got on the mic again, and said he was looking forward to his first Mania and his first title.  Porter brought up Benoit's loss to Cena on Monday before saying that when he loses to "Smackdown's franchise player", it won't be a bad thing, as he'll be the first person to lose his title to MVP, and that Benoit would be featured in the highlight reels of MVP's career, and that the fact he lost to MVP would be remembered when Porter got his eventual induction into the Hall of Fame.

Thoughts - 2/10 - 1 for the match which was fine enough in getting a few of Porter's moves over, the other point for the geography major in the creative team...

Bobby Lashley def. RKennedyO (a.k.a. Randy Orton & Ken Kennedy) in a "If at first you don't succeed, edit it in post-production!!!" Handicap Tables match

Of course, the story of this one, if you read the spoilers is that the final spot where Lashley was supposed to put Orton through the table didn't work.  Twice.  So they had to go back and do it again.  Should be interesting to see how this plays out...  For Lashley to win, he had to put both his opponents through tables, while Lashley need only go through one.  And they pimped this as the first tables match for nearly 2 years...

Naturally, both guy went for Lashley, but Bobby managed to fight both off.  He was overwhelmed for a second, but managed to throw out Orton, leaving Kennedy to himself.  Lashley down some clubbing blows and fists.  Lashley and Kennedy got into a stand up fight, when Orton tripped Lashley up in the ropes.  However, Lashley stayed on top.  However, Kennedy pulled Orton out of the way of a corner charge, leaving Bobby to slam his shoulder into the ring post.    This allowed the heels to work over Lashley's shoulder.  As Kennedy held Lashley down for the Orton Stomp, Vince McMahon wandered out.  Orton got himself a table, setting it up in the ring, as Kennedy stayed on top of Lashley.  Orton placed Lashley on the table and got Kennedy to go up top.  Bobby fought his way off, but was taken into the corner by both men.

Kennedy got himself some timber, propping his table up in the corner.  However, in some piss-poor timing, Lashley began to fight his way back into it.  With both his foes in corners, Lashley charged both men.  However, with Orton in the Torture Rack position, Kennedy kicked Lashley's leg out.  However, Lashley powered up, drove/pushed Kennedy through one table, before powerslamming Orton through the other table, winning the match!

Thoughts - 6.5/10 - I think Lashley was a little too dominant here, but it was pretty good stuff.  However, it would have been better if Lashley had been placed in more peril.  There's something of a Catch-22 here though, in my opinion.  If they have Lashley dominate too much, then it doesn't do anything for Orton or Kennedy and just bores the crowd.  If he's dominated too much, then he could be seen as not being good enough, and his comeback would have to be "bigger" than if he were dominant from the off.  As I say, I think he was a little too dominant here though.

And hey, I couldn't see the edit...

No, Dave...GET ANGRY, DAMN IT!!!

Kristal was backstage with Batista, with a rather thick head of hair.  Kristal sent it to a replay of last week, when Undertaker threw Finlay into the Champ.  His reaction?  He felt it was a bit of a cheap shot, but it wasn't about getting angry, but even.  He said that he and Taker would get along fine.  During the match...

Chris Benoit def. Gregory Helms in a "Who's this Benoit guy?  And I don't think I've seen this Helms dude before..." Non-Title match

Benoit comes out, before he hit another commercial.  We come back with the match in progress!  Helms got Benoit in a corner, where he began to lay in fists, but Benoit started with STIFF~! chops!  A back body drop was followed by a suplex for a short count.  Benoit hit a bodyslam before a falling headbutt.  He then hit a suplex, but Helms caught him and pulled Benoit outside, before diving onto him.  Back in the ring, Helms choked Benoit on the ropes before guillotining Benoit on the middle rope.  Helms locking in a headlock with bodyscissors.  However, with Benoit in the mount position, Benoit got a few punches in to break the hold.

In the corner, Benoit laid in some more chops, but Helms hit a neckbreaker.  Helms blocked a German suplex attempt, but Benoit turned it into a Northern Lights suplex, before hitting the Germans.  A diving headbutt connected, before Benoit locked in the Crossface, to which Helms tapped out.

Thoughts - 6.5/10 - This was a good tune up match for Benoit, especially since he hasn't been on TV for a while.  Helms did well here too.

What ECW can do, Smackdown can do better...or at least equal...

And so Smackdown got their own Hall Of Fame inductee announcement!  And this one was The Wild Samoans, Afa & Sika! The "induction" video was very cool, with comments form Rikishi and The Rock (the latter of which, at least, was from a new interview).  After that, JBL said he had something to do, dumping his headset and taking his leave.

Man, they sure do love having Hogan taking a beating or getting beaten in these things, don't they?

And we stay in 2002, a time we have visited in recent weeks in these UK "From The Vault" segments.  I'm almost beginning to have faith in the WWE not doing stuff from 2006 now...  This time, we were in June as HHH was mid-entrance in a rematch of Backlash against Hulk Hogan, for the title shot at King Of The Ring.  And I must note a correction from Jason Barnett, as I got my HHH title reigns mixed up (not tough to do, he always seemed to have the belt at that point...).  It was of course the run from Undertaker to Rock to Lesnar, who stayed on Smackdown while HHH got his own belt.

Either way, HHH managed to get his win back, after dropping the Undisputed belt to Hogan.  After the match, HHH tired to help Hogan up, but got shoved off.  Hogan then demanded that HHH got back to the ring.  But he just wanted to shake hands and hug.  1, 2, 3....Aaaawwwww...

I'm looking forward to this...

Teddy Long was with Kristal, as Long gave her a rose.  JBL barged in, as Long thought JBL should be at his place.  JBL had a proposition for him.  JBL said that he was thinking that next week, he should interview Batista AND Undertaker at the same time.  He said that he could ask the tough question.  Long asked if he really wanted to be in the middle of those 2.  JBL was confident, so he got his wish.

Well, Undertaker's never around to take a beating, so...

As Batista walked backstage, Booker & Finlay jumped him!  They threw him into some steel barrel and laid fists until they were eventually held off by officials and referees.

Undertaker def. King Booker & Finlay by DQ in a "Better VERY, VERY, VERY late than never" match

After the oh-so-happy-with-themselves heels made their way out, Undertaker followed.  Batista?  No dice on that one, I'm afraid.  Taker was on his lonesome...  Booker started for his team while Undertaker started for his...well, him. Taker was backed into the heel corner, but he fought his way out and looked to go for Old School on Booker.  However, seeing Finlay coming, Undertaker jumped from the top turnbuckle, turning it into something of an armdrag, albeit not a pretty one.  But he then took Finlay by the arm, hitting Old School on him.  Things spilled to the outside, as Taker sent Finlay into the steel steps, as we took our final break.

Back from break,  Undertaker was going for his leg drop on the apron, but Booker saved Finlay from a fate worse then leg dropping, but clotheslining Taker off the apron.  Back in, Booker punched away at Taker before hitting a standing side kick.  Finlay took over the work, in his usual smashmouth style.  Booker came back in, laying in forearms to Taker's back.  Finlay same back in, as he continued to work on Undertaker's back, first ramming him into the corner, then with knees to the back, to some sort of half crab.  Undertaker came back though with fists-a-flying.  However, the numbers game caught up to him, as Finlay took him down again.  When the King came back in, the teases finishers, before Booker got the advantage with a headlock.  However, Taker suplexed out of it, before locking in a Triangle Choke on him, which JBL recalled being saved from by WWI's very own Orlando Jordan.

Undertaker began to mount a comeback after hitting a DDT on Finlay which drew a 6 count while both men were down.  Taker squashed his opponent between corners.  Snake Eyes and a Big Boot were reserved for Booker.  Finlay went for a shillelagh shot, but got caught.  Taker had his opponents set for a chokeslam, but Finlay used the weapon for the DQ.  The heels began a beating, but Batista finally made his way out.  They set up for stereo powerbombs.  However, as Undertaker lifted first, that allowed Batista to toss King Booker into Undertaker, knocking the Deadman on his ass.

Thoughts - 7/10 - Pretty good match, with Undertaker being worked over just the right amount, as compared with the earlier Handicap match, anyway.  And Batista, once again, got "even".  I'd still have preferred "Angry" though.  Hopefully, that comes next week...

OVERALL - 7/10 (- 1 on last week) - And so completes the trifecta.  That is to say every show this week has been solid-to-good, but unspectacular.  It only re-affirms my belief that this was the “calm before the storm”.  They were giving the RAW hype the proverbial “beans” on this show.  But this show was fully watchable, and pretty enjoyable.  But not unmissable.  That should be next week, with JBL interviewing Batista & Undertaker…  If JBL talks anything like he did on RAW on Monday, that segment should be gangbusters…

That’s all I got for now, but if you have something to say about this week’s Smackdown, you can e-mail me at dedicated e-mail address, or come hunt me down on the WWI Forums!

OR, you can find me along with the rest of the dribbling masses on MY OWN MYSPACE PAGE!

Well, I’ll be back soon enough, but for now, I believe I’ve fulfilled my contractual obligations.  For reading this, And continuing to support World Wrestling Insanity, you’re cooler than the other side of the pillow…

I’m out.