ZAH
Shakin' My Head: "The Explanation", steroid stuff, WWE HOF thoughts, bein' Savage, Loser of the Week, plus much more!!
By ZAH
Mar 24, 2007, 06:00

03-24-07

“Oh please god, wake me.”

Boo-yah, I guess.

***

Item #1 – The explanation.

I’m separating from my wife.

I don’t want this to sound like I’m whining.  I don’t want this to come off like a sympathy plea.  I don’t want your sympathy...I don’t want your pity...I don’t want any e-mails or PM’s telling me how sorry you are to hear about my situation...whatever.  I just need to vent and my column is where I’m going to do it.

I’ve been living in marital problematic hell for months and months now, but only recently was the decision made to end it.  Over the past week I’ve been unsure which way was up and haven’t had the opportunity to really talk to anybody about it until now.

Now?

Yeah...like I said, I just need to vent.  Basically, the marital problems are primarily my fault.  I’ve got a short fuse so I lose my temper quite often.  Not in a physical way, mind you...I’ve never touched my wife in that type of way nor would I.  The thing is that I’ve got low self-esteem issues (let the violin begin playing) so I always feel like she’s attacking me.  Once I feel like my back is against the wall, I come out swinging verbally and start getting overly defensive.  She’s got a low threshold and she jumps right back at me.  It’s stupid all around but that’s what happens.  A lot.

I also spend too much time on the Internet.  To some, a half-hour per night may not sound like much but I’ve got a 6-month old baby so even spending that much time is too much.  I was working 11-hour days and coming home exhausted, wanting just 15-30 minutes to change-over from “work” mode to “daddy/husband” mode.  That was a selfish move on my part.  I guess now I’ll have all the time in the world to think about it.

Am I completely to blame for my marital collapse?  No.  But I’m not gonna sit here and bash my wife before the separation papers are even dry.

I guess the bottom line is that I really take my readers to heart and when I get e-mails and PM’s asking why I’m not writing like I normally do then I feel like I owe them an explanation.  I appreciate those who take the time out of their day to drift off into 5-10 minutes of nonsense written by me.  I don’t take that lightly.

So there you have it.  I don’t know if I feel any better or not (for Chissakes...if I'm not listening to Metallica or Iron Maiden I’m listening to Phil Collins songs!!!), but I hope you understand that my columns simply haven’t been at the top of my priority list over the past month or so.  I hope you also understand that unless I unintentionally go off on a tangent, the quality may not be too great either for awhile (if they even that great to begin with).

Just to re-iterate, I’m not writing this for attention.  I’m doing this to vent and explain to you what’s been up on my end. 

Let’s move on.

***

Item #2 – So...something happened involving steroids this week?

Listen, I’m not going to start bashing the shady journalism or the pill-poppin’ wrestlers because of this story.  I think this can be summed-up quite simply.  It happened before the WWE Wellness Program and, unless the authorities want to press charges against the individuals mentioned, it should be left there.

Should we turn a blind eye to it?  No, I’m not saying that.  Too many recent wrestling deaths can be attributed to past steroid/drug use and abuse.  What I’m saying is that as surprising as it may seem to be, the Wellness Program appears to be working.  People are being released or sent to rehab or taken off the road if testing positive.  While Vince is still dead-set on pushing untalented muscle-bound freaks of nature as his primary champions of choice, he’s not willing to risk their lives or the financial well-being of his company in order to do it (especially when there is a bigger federal "eye" on the situation).

Not for one minute do I believe that Vince McMahon is against steroids...quite the contrary.  But I think he realizes the publicity nightmare that can come from all of this and, due primarily to Eddie Guerrero’s very public death, he knows the Wellness Program needs to be in place.

Now having said all that, I think the article may have been so quick to glorify certain names that it forgot to actually look into the situations and conditions surrounding each and every case.  Yes, everybody declined comment initially...but who’s to say how they were contacted?  I mean... “Care to publicly comment on the story coming out on you taking steroids illegally?” could be a shocking thing to hear at first.  “No comment” would be the immediate response until you had some time to let it sink in.

Some of the names brought up by Sports Illustrated?  Randy Orton (accused of getting eight prescriptions for six drugs like oxandrolone and testosterone), Edge (accused of receiving HGH), Rey Mysterio (stanozolol & nandrolene), Gregory Helms (HGH), Kurt Angle, and Eddy Guerrero (stanozolol).

Is this all a huge illegal big deal?  Well, not if you believe the blogs of both Edge and Helms:

If you are reading this blog and it sees the light of day, than that means that an article has been written by a Sports Illustrated writer that states I received HGH from a pharmacy in 2003. So, I'll cut right to the chase like I always do. It's true. However, it's not exactly breaking, earth shattering news. It's actually old news. I admitted to this on national television in Canada in 2004 on Off The Record. When host Michael Lansberg asked me if I'd ever taken steroids, without consulting me before the show, I was perturbed, but answered without hesitation, "Yes, I have." In hindsight, I'm glad he asked the question. It got it out in the open and anyone who follows my career or supports me already knows this information about me. I won't try to defend my actions. I took them when coming back from my spinal fusion neck surgery when I was told by doctors that it would help the bones grow back around the screws and plate that were now inserted in my neck. I'm not glorifying. I'm not condoning. Just telling you why I decided to take them. I took blood tests, consulted doctors, read up, studied them, got prescriptions, and decided to do it. That's pretty much it folks, but I wanted you to get my response straight from me and not through the words of another writer.

-          Adam “Edge” Copeland, Wednesday, March 21^st

So anyway, here's the story, several years ago I had hurt my knee and was advised by 2 different doctors to undergo this particular therapy. I didn't ask for it, hell, I didn't even know about it, all I knew is that I didn't want to have to have surgery. Not to mention that I would like for my life after wrestling to be as painless as possible. I won't be able to wrestle forever and I would hope that I'm entitled to the best quality of life available to me when that time comes. I would like to think that it's well in my human rights to take whatever a doctor tells me to if it helps my condition and relieves my pain. Isn't that what everyone goes to a doctor for? Shane Helms committed no crime and did absolutely nothing illegal. And that is a FACT!!! Trust me, there are a million ways to get any kind of legal or illegal medicine/drug you want. However, I was under the assumption that going thru a doctor, getting treatment and therapy for a totally LEGAL medicine was the right way to go about dealing with this particular injury. And this injury that might have led to surgery had I not taken the therapy that I did. It's strange how that part of the story was conveniently left out! Besides, look at me! I'm not 300 lbs of muscle, the biggest I've ever been is 215, I'm not abusing ANYTHING other that the abuse my body takes doing the job I love. Hell, I didn't even drink alcohol until I was 27.

-          Shane “Gregory” Helms, Thursday, March 22^nd

Well...take those for what you will.  Believable?  Sure.  Fact?  Who knows for sure?  And does it really matter now?  Should this be beaten into the ground?  Does somebody like Jim Rome really need to shoot his mouth off on things like this when he knows absolutely NOTHING about each individual’s situation?

No...but that’s the media for you.  I think this should all blow over soon.  If you see somebody like John Cena get caught for using illegal, un-prescribed steroids in 2007 then yeah...it’ll be a big deal.  Until then, steroids are going to be part of the wrestling business...right or wrong.  Deal with it.

***

Item #3 – Chris Hero is living a dream.

To somebody’s who is a die-hard life-long wrestling fan who loves all forms of the art (including Lucha, sports entertainment, puro, etc), having the ability to go over to Japan and work with an absolute legend like Misawa is something that really cannot be put into words. 

Over the past year, I have put over Chris Hero’s ability both in the ring and on the mic.  It is nice to see he is continuing to make a living doing what he loves to do.  Is he WWE material?  Probably not.  Is he capable of making a very good living on the independent circuit?  Absolutely. 

Keep up the great work, Chris.

***

Item #4 – Please stop the insanity!  Ohhhhh yeaahhh!!!

I was a HUGE Randy “Macho Man” Savage mark growing up...especially before his babyface turn and run as WWF champ.  I absolutely marveled at the spectacle that was Savage entering an arena and wrestling the way he did while all the while being the bad-ass heel that I used to love watching (I was a big mark for heels back as a teen).  Hell...I even thought the initial Jesse “the Body” Ventura & Savage tag team had a legit shot at tag team gold.

So, as entertaining as it was to see Jay Lethal do a Randy Savage imitation once on Impact, I really must plead with TNA Creative (whoever the f*ck is in charge...Mantell, Russo, Jarrett...I don’t care anymore) to please STOP this nonsense. 

I mean, Lethal is a guy who has shown absolutely ZERO mic skills over his initial few years in the sport.  His ROH promos are some of the most cringe-worthy drivel I’ve ever seen come from a professional wrestler in my life...absolute GWF-quality horrible.  In TNA he has developed a modicum of a personality but he’s still as stiff as a board.  Now...now he gets to become somebody else and he comes “alive”.

It’s not like he’s Austin Aries...who’s as talented in the ring as anybody in the world today but looks absolutely stupid in his current gimmick.  Seriously...each and every time I see Aries I see a guy who’s trying to be different, but I just don’t buy it.  The opposite-looking tights?  The bugged-out eyes?  The awkward way he tries to strut?  His “wet hair look”?  The one boot with straps on them?  I just don’t buy it...his personality simply doesn’t resonate enough to be seen as credible in his current role.

So now we’re throwing yet another X-Division in-ring performer to the WrestleCrap Hall of Fame.  Apparently TNA management is very high on Lethal’s impressions, but how in the blue flames of hell do they expect him to get over pretending to be somebody else?  They want him to continue this charade in an effort to get over with the fans and become a “personality”.

Good lord...at the last tapings it was reported that Kevin Nash and Jeremy Borash actually had to bribe the audience with offers to donate money to charity if they would cheer Lethal when he came out.  How sad is that?

The good thing?  At least Lethal doesn’t have to act as f*cking pathetic as Ron Killings in order to get on TV.

***

Item #5 – Wait a second...

Vince McMahon will put the Sheik into the WWE Hall of Fame but refuses to seriously consider Randy Savage or the Ultimate Warrior??

Sheik never was a mainstay for WWE, AWA, or NWA during his career.  He made his mark as one of the most famous independent wrestlers of all time (along with the likes of Bruiser Brody and Abdullah the Butcher, who at least made appearances in NWA & WCW).  Vince hated that fact so much that he refused to allow anybody to mention his death in any way on WWE programming.

But because his nephew, the soon-to-be-fired Sabu, is on the roster and will break kayfabe once again to induct him, McMahon has felt the need to place him in the Hall before MANY other more deserving choices.

I dunno...if McMahon and Hart could come to an agreement and even shake hands, could McMahon and Warrior?  I mean, even if Savage did bang Stephanie when she was a teenager (which is the rumor...unsubstantiated and not realistic if you look at the timeframes involved), hasn’t enough time passed for Vince to move on and make the right business decision?

Christ on a cracker...you give us the AWA and Von Erich DVD’s but you can’t bite the freakin’ bullet and give us a 3-DVD Randy Savage set??? 

Bullshit, I say.  Shenanigans.  Hockey puck.

***

Item #6 – Jarrett’s comin’ back.

For all of you Jarrett haters out there...just be patient.  The focus of all your scorn is set to return very soon.  Oh...but this time you’re gonna have to cheer him.

Yeah, I know.  Apparently Jarrett is banking on his absence being turned into “we miss you” heat and also playing off the reason why he left in the first place (to tend to his sick wife) to turn any potential boos into cheers.

I bet you can’t wait, can you?  I say he’s NWA champion by year’s end at least one more time.

***

Item # 7 – LOSER OF THE WEEK.

Each and every week, I pick somebody (not necessarily always from wrestling) who has either acted in a dumb way, said something stupid, or generally was an idiot in some way, shape, or form.  This week is a pick by default.  ZAH’s Loser of the Week simply has to be...

Me.

Again...not looking for sympathy or anything...but I’m separating from my wife after less than two years of marriage.  It doesn’t take long to realize this simply wasn’t my week.  Sucks to be me, I guess.  Therefore in a first, I am my own Loser of the Week!

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Item #8 – World Wrestling Insanity FANTASY BASEBALL!!

We had a smaller group last year so I’d like to see something a little bigger this year.  The live draft is WrestleMania weekend so sign up now!!!.

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Pillar to Post 

Each and every week I’ll take three statements that you, the WorldWrestlingInsanity.com readers, have submitted on the hot topics du jour and then get two or three volunteers to give their thoughts and insight.  Ladies and gentlemen, this week (and I encourage every reader to throw me an e-mail and volunteer), I was able to find three great World Wrestling Insanity readers in WWI columnist Aaron Wood, SpandexMonkeyMan,& fireman718239!

1. Agree or Disagree
The new WWE steroid “scandal” will adversely affect the 2007 financial bottom line.

Aaron Wood: To be honest, I don't think it will.

You see, while the debate has pretty much raged on the superbulous, fantasticoso WWI Message Board, I've stayed out of it. Why? Because while I'm concerned, I'm not surprised nor shocked. You would have to be foolish if you thought Angle would be the only one implicated, and let's face it. Steroids and the like are to modern day wrestling as apple pie is to America.

Also, the time period being talked about is a while ago now, and they have a wellness program in place. And for all the debate as to whether the Wellness Program is "real" or not, at least there is one. And it's more than TNA has, and with apparently 5 wrestlers still unnamed, you can't count out 1 or 2 of them to be from TNA. The WWE can (and already have) say that they've instituted one since that time and conduct tests and work around those findings.

We've heard about people being disciplined for breaking the program in some way, and we've heard about times they've done testing. So overall, I don't think it's going to hurt as much as some people think and/or hope it will.

SpandexMonkeyMan: Disagree.

In a few weeks people will doubtless have lost interest in this story, or something bigger will have turned up. Plus, the E is looking at a really solid WrestleMania card at the mo, so if they can maintain momentum their product will be strong enough to keep people watching. And, in all honesty, the WWE's bottom line comes from PPV's, DVD's and merchandise, and who's gonna stop buying them just because of all this?

fireman718239: Disagree.

There's no "scandal". I don't see how performers being on steroids or any other type of enhancer comes as a shock to anyone. All you have to do is look at them. They're on the road far too much to spend enough time in the gym to get those bodies. They use enhancers to maintain their weight and also it helps injuries heal faster. The thing is the people who are investigating this could care less about who's taking the steroids; their main focus is to take down those who are supplying and prescribing them. So, WWE doesn't have much to worry about in terms of legal problems unless they’re helping supply their performers with this stuff like they were in the 80s and 90s. That wouldn't surprise me in the least and if that's true than WWE is in a lot of hot water. One only needs to take one look at Vince McMahon, you know if he's taking them, and he most certainly is, than the performers have to be too since they're the ones that are actually wrestling.

2. Agree or Disagree
Bringing back Jeff Jarrett as a babyface is a terrible idea for TNA.

Aaron Wood: I have one MAJOR worry with Jarrett coming back as a babyface. The Champion is currently a heel. I've alluded to the comparison a couple of times on the message board, but I truly do believe that Jarrett thinks this will be like when HHH returned in 2002, and will book himself (since he is on the creative team, no matter what the current spin is on who is writing what) accordingly. That means he will expect (and probably get) a big "Haven't seen you in a long time" pop, before settling into a title reign within 4/6 months to which the TNA public, such as it currently is, will grow apathetic.

Also, on the babyface side of things you have Samoa Joe, Rhino, Kurt Angle (allegedly), Sting (again, allegedly) and Abyss (Well, he's supposed to be getting there...). While on the heel side, there's Christian Cage, Scott Steiner and AJ. I'm not sure there needs to be another face in the equation, especially if Jarrett does win the title, because he's going to lack proper heels to work with, although with almost everyone able to swing one way or another at the drop of a hat that point may be moot.

All in all, I don't think Jarrett as a face is the worst thing TNA could do, but he has to be booked VERY carefully.

SpandexMonkeyMan: Disagree.

I'm not convinced it will work, but I don't think it's a terrible idea. Jarrett is a strong wrestler, has good mic work and better in-ring psychology than a lot of the TNA roster. If they push him right (let's face it, TNA would not exist without this man), it could work. But the Orlando fans are too petty to let a couple of slightly overlong title reigns go, so I don't know if they'll let it work.

fireman718239: Strongly Agree.

I think it'd be a mistake to bring back Jeff Jarrett at all. He adds nothing to TNA but a problem. I still don't think he's a main eventer, he's always been a decent midcarder at best. The problem here lies in the fact that he books himself like he's the top act in the company. I've said it before and I'll say it again, Jeff Jarrett is not a star. He never was and never will be. For TNA to bring back Jarrett at all would be shooting themselves in the foot. If they do choose to bring him back, I don't think that they'll last too much longer.

3. Agree or Disagree
WWE is putting misguided efforts behind their push of Bobby Lashley.

Aaron Wood: Yeah, because a 5-time national amateur champion is SO not worth anyone's time and money...Jesus H... I mean really, I have to ask myself "What is wrong with you", when I read guff like, "Lashley can't wrestle". HE CAN! Either that or the mid-late ninties completely sucked ass at the amateur level.

I think Bobby's biggest problem is that he isn't Brock Lesnar. People look at what happened with Brock Lesnar, and how he got to the level he did at super-speed, and are, frankly, expecting that of Lashley, when they look and see so many similarities. Yes, he was very green to it when he came in. But he's only been a face in WWE, whereas he was a heel for most, if not all, his time in OVW.

He is improving. He is going to be money, I have no doubt. Personally, I wouldn't have taken him off of Smackdown, because with good heads like Finlay, Booker, Undertaker and Benoit (oh, for a Lashley/Benoit match...) on there, he had more scope to improve rather than having to front up ECW as Champion working fewer, less talented people. However, I think he's the right man for the Trump/McMahon match. I think he was the right guy to break the Masterlock and I think the WWE's efforts will pay off, with Lashley being one of the biggest stars in the company in a year or two. I would like to see a heel turn at the end of the year though.

SpandexMonkeyMan: Strongly Disagree.

Lashley is a future star. His ring work is coming on leaps and bounds, and he's being let down more by a sub-par title scene in ECW than by his own work. If he works on his mic skills he could be a major star in years to come (don't forget, he's still young, and has time to improve). The main reason I think people aren't behind Lashley is because they perceive him as being pushed over the head of CM Punk, who is the darling of the internet. But, in my opinion at least, Lashley could be twice the star Punk is. He's not there now, but in a couple of years with some better opponents, he really could be.

fireman718239: Disagree.

He's in the most publicized match of the year, he's being pushed exactly the way he should be. He needs to be made to look unbeatable for fans to believe he can beat Umaga. Actually, this is what they should have done before he became ECW Champion. He needs to be made to look as unstoppable as possible, similar to how they booked Batista before he won the World Title. I feel this match could put him over big time. The one thing I don’t like is that he's booked on Raw next week against Vince, I thought they should've saved any physical contact between Vince and Lashley until Mania so it could get the big pop. Other than that though, his push is going perfectly.

***

Wow...great job gang!!  I’m looking forward to seeing who gets to join me as a guest columnist next week. 

No problem.  Seriously...it’s not a problem at all.  Really...let me know RIGHT NOW!!  You can let me know either by e-mailing me at Zah@worldwrestlinginsanity.com or hitting me up at ZAH Nation, found in the Insanity Message Board and letting me know that you’d like to participate.  Also, don’t forget to stop by my MySpace page and add me.

So until next week…

L8R