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Canadian Bulldog's Breaking News: DX Invades White House

By Canadian Bulldog
Sep 5, 2006, 14:41


...

Above: Triple H and Shawn Michaels, up to no good in the nation's capital.

By Canadian Bulldog, World Wrestling Insanity News

(Washington, DC) - Are you ready?

D Generation X, wrestling's favorite group of rogue thirty-somethings, invaded the world's most famous address today.

DX'ers Triple H and Shawn Michaels arrived at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue this morning in a camouflage-detailed tank. They surprised nearby protesters by shouting out patented catchphrases on a megaphone, whilst chopping their crotches.

"What an awesome idea," said Josh Hillman, who was organizing a rally that day to support the decriminalization of marijuana. "We totally should have brought a tank to this, too."

DX then took their shtick to the throngs of protesters and White House employees that had gathered, trying to get them to say that the U.S. government was handing out free passes "to make the place look full on TV."

Then, while White House security guards were responding to a bomb threat (which, sources suggest, was called in by DX alumnae X-Pac), the two former World Champions allegedly spray-painted their logo over the front of the building.

"We're not entirely sure why they're doing this," White House spokesperson Scott McClellan told reporters. "Honestly, it's not even all that funny."

Later that afternoon, DX returned to the White House lawn, with Triple H dressed like President George W. Bush, and Michaels as Vice President Dick Cheney.

Oh, DX: Is there anything you WON'T do to make us laugh?

"My name is George Dubya, and I love Bush!" Triple H said as part of a hilarious 90-minute skit. "I wonder if my VP loves Bush, too?"

"No way, Dubya. I love Dick!" Michaels continued. "Because my name is Dick. Get it? Ahahahahaha! And we're both a bunch of poopy-heads!"

"Hey, stop stealing my material!" shouted WWE superstar John Cena from the audience.

Following the sketch, which also featured rooster noises aplenty and a request for Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice to bare her breasts, the real President Bush showed up, angered by the day's events.

"That damn DX!" said Bush, his face turning red. "If they think they can get away with this, well, I've just got two words for ya: Security, safety, and prosperityism of the American people."

-30-

Canadian Bulldog is a borderline journalist who writes weekly for World Wrestling Insanity and Online Onslaught and has published his own book of nutty e-mails to wrestlers. See his obscenely expensive Canadian BullBLOG for more details. He welcomes your comments at CanadianBulldog@worldwrestlinginsanity.com


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© 2005-2007 All content contained here Copyright 2006 by James Guttman *** World Wrestling Insanity and ClubWWI are not affiliated with any wrestling promotion.